I hope I am cut out for this!!

[sugarpop]

Today was bad, yesterday was bad...the bad is what I can remember. I know there have been good days, but the bad are soooo bad that they seem to cloud my vision.

I have always hoped and dreamed of staying at home. And now here I am with my first child, Sophia, 5 months old and staying at home...a dream come true, or so I keep reminding myself.

I have a new found respect for SAHM. I always respected them...but now I ttruly get it.

Teething is awful. The crying relentless. Then I get frustrated and say things to my angel like "I can't take it any more, that's enough, stop crying". What a jerk I am! I feel like an awful mother. My sweet girl is in pain...and I am frustrated? ! what gives me th right!

Noone else will care for her like I do...I am the best for her. I just hope my best is good enough!

Thanks for reading...I just needed to get my feelings out.

[LoMaH]

Originally Posted by sugarpop

Teething is awful. The crying relentless. Then I get frustrated and say things to my angel like "I can't take it any more, that's enough, stop crying". What a jerk I am! I feel like an awful mother. My sweet girl is in pain...and I am frustrated? ! what gives me th right!

Yes, it can be hard some days.
Try to forgive yourself.
Sometimes going for a nice long walk or car drive calms baby. Also, would you consider trying something like Hyland's teething homeopathics to see if it helps little Sophia (pretty name)?

http://hylands.com/products/teething.php

[K-Mom3]

Just want to lend you some support.



Those days of endless crying are really hard. I agree, going outside helps my kids. Also baths sometimes helped. Or a bottle of cold water--One of my kids liked that and it is nice because they can chew on the nipple of th bottle instead of your boob.

I really can relate to the feeling "I hope my best is good enough." I feel like that often.

[Reebekah]

i also have a baby around the same age (born sept. 09).....i know what you are going thru.....and i also have a 2.5 yr old and a 4 year old. i too have days when i hope my best is good enough.....i too wanted this more than anything....and i too say or think things that i regret when i'm frustrated and overwhelmed. nobody is perfect....it IS very hard to take care of kids....all you can do is try your best.
for my little guy, i try to divert his attention and keep him occupied...usually that keeps him more content. as we go about our day, i move him from bouncy seat, swing, bumbo seat, floor, high chair, and lots of time cuddling in my arms in between of course. i give him different toys, sit him in front of a mirror, etc. i put on music and dance around for him while i wash the dishes or cook or whatever. it seems that a constant change of scenery interests him. i also make sure that he is well rested, so he isnt nearly as fussy....he takes a short morning nap, a long mid-day nap, and a short early evening nap before going to bed around 8pm. i still nurse him about every 2-3 hours, but this week we started him on some rice cereal and that seemed to make him more content as well. as for the teething, he loves to chew on baby toys, and i put a little bit of orajel on his gums at night if he seems to be crying in pain.
coming from a mom that has done this 3 times in the last 4 years, i know that it DOES get easier........shortly she will be talking and telling you what she wants/needs, and playing with you, and you will be on a much more predictable schedule.
hang in there, and dont be too hard on yourself.....

[Autumn C.]

Also chiming in with support...

Going outside was the only thing that worked for my littlest. Going outside in a sling (do you baby wear?) was the only thing keeping me sane sometimes. You don't have to go anywhere in particular just walk the exercise, air, rhythm will defineltly be good for you and might help with the kiddo.

Good luck!

[sugarpop]

Thanks mamas! Today, so long as the rain holds off I will go for a walk with her. I worry about the cold, but I will bundle her up, she does like being outside...or did before it got cold.

Last night, after she woke up the first time, I climbed into bed with her and was nursing her. She was in between sleep and awake in a state that appeared to be bliss. She looked up at me with her big beautiful slate blue eyes and they said it all, everything I needed to hear. "I love you, thank you" . Made it all worth it, I would do an awful day again if it ended with that look!

Thanks for your support, I needed it. Good to hear support and not get people telling me I am awful. Good to know others have rough days too, and also good to hear this will pass. I am not wishing away this month, just the pain she feels, the misery she seems to be stuck in.

ETA: Oh and she woke up at 11:30 for 2 hours last night, I was so tired and not amused. So then she thought we should play a game, which I refuse to do in the middle of the night. We play I'm going to eat you. She kept leaning over and attacking my face, I thought hmmm she is hungry...nope just wanted to play. She did it like ten times, I couldn't help but laugh and promise to play games today. She is fun!

[Beauchamp]

I know what that feels like, for sure! One day I am on top of the world, the next I am crying. I make sure I get my vitamin every day. Sunshine helps, depending on where you live. I hate hearing "this too shall pass", especially when I just want something to *work* and I don't want to just *wait*. Babies are VERY long days, VERY short years, if you know what I mean. It's a struggle. A beautiful, exhausting, rewarding, painful, wonderful struggle. Keep on posting here when you get down or feel overwhelmed. This forum has kept me from the edge more than a few times.

[sugarpop]

The first tooth broke through!!! The light...I hope I see a light and not that kid with a the candle again...at the end of the first tunnel.

(My mom has often told me just when she thinks she see the light at the end of the tunnel she realizes it is a kid holding a candle, running from her just as she gets close. lol)