worried about friend's baby...

[Oliver'sMom]

I'm not sure if I should say anything to her, but I'm really starting to get concerned about her baby's health.

Her baby was born weighing nearly 11 pounds. He's 6 months old now and weighs over 33 pounds! I know this because people are always asking her how much her baby weighs. He's alarmingly large. She exclusively breast feeds him...just started giving him avacado and sweet potato a couple of weeks ago.

What concerns me most is that he seems very behind developmentally. He couldn't hold his head up until he was 4 months old. He can't sit up. He honestly can barely move. He isn't interested in playing with his hands etc.

I know there is a very wide range of normal. Is there any cause of concern here? His parents and older brother are all of average height and weight. My friend thinks that since he's breast fed he must be fine.

What would you do?

[alfabetsoup]

Does she do well baby checkups? If so, she has probably discussed any concerns with her ped. I wouldn't say anything unless she mentions it and then I would just let her talk about it and make encouraging noises.

[marisa724]

My DS2 was nearly that big at 6 months, also exclusively breastfed. He was only 8.5 pounds at birth.

He did eat a few tastes of solids here and there starting at 5.5 months, but nothing that would affect his weight either way. His dad and I are dead average for height and weight, as is DS1 (now that he's a little older).

He was slightly later to meet his milestones than his older brother (who was several pounds lighter at 6m). However, he did do everything he was supposed to, well within the range of normal. I imagine that it might be a little harder for a baby that chunky to get around as easily, but believe me once he gets going he will slim down and stop gaining quite so quickly. My giant DS2 is now almost 2 and he's still right around 33 pounds -- I still wouldn't call him slim, he's still in the 90th percentiles for height and weight, but he's only gained about three pounds in the last 18 months.

If he is going to well baby visits the dr. will go over a full checklist of what the baby is supposed to be doing, and will check for things like poor muscle tone. Otherwise it sounds like a fine, healthy boy -- nothing to be concerned about!

[eepster]

It really could be absolutely nothing. There are some rare disorders that sound kind of like what you are describing. Two that happen to pop into my mind are Sotos syndrome and Weavers syndrome (just b/c I happen to have been talking to someone about those two recently, not b/c I'm convince your friends baby has those.) There really is no way that any of us can properly dx or rule out something just by looking at what you see when you are hanging out with you friend. This is what well baby visits are for, so the pediatrician can keep an eye on any unusual development. As you say there is a huge range of normal, and the pediatrician is in a better position to say if the baby is just at the high end weight wise of normal and the low end of normal for physical milestones, or if this all adds up to a need to look deeper.

[Oliver'sMom]

No, they don't do well baby visits. I forgot to mention that. They go to a naturopath if one of them is very sick, but this baby has never been seen by a doctor or naturopath. He was born at home (UC).

[Drummer's Wife]

We don't do WBV, either... But, if I had any concerns that my LO wasn't developing normally, or had any other heath related questions I'd be doing a check-up, just to check-up! For me, that would include a baby who was way off the charts - in either direction. As far as developmental milestones - I would go with my gut, I guess. I have four kids who were always ahead wih gross motor activities - so delays in a future baby would likely have me worried.

Have you voiced your concerns with your friend? Other than that, I'm not sure what else you can do.

[InMediasRes]

I had a cousin whose baby weighed that much at 3 MONTHS OLD. He was FF, but he was totally healthy. He took forever to roll over and sit up and crawl, etc. But after 3 months, he just didn't gain hardly any weight for a long time. He is 2.5ish now and he's big for his age, but he looks well within the range of normal and is right on track with his milestones.

[RiverSky]

I once knew someone who's baby was like that at 15 months, then she took her to a pediatric chiropractor and voila, like that the baby started moving. Perhaps you might suggest that?

[ambersrose]

Do you know a good ped. in the area you can refer her too if you decide to express your concern? It is more helpful to come to someone with sources to help with the concern or problem.

[Learning_Mum]

DS1 was a big baby and he's now a big pre-schooler. Not fat but much taller than the other kids his age. He took longer to do things, but still within the 'normal' time frame. I think it's just harder for big babies to do the physical things - they have alot more weight to move around.

The only thing I would find concerning is that he's not interested in his hands. Has he never been interested or has he lost interest? Does he pick things up and mouth them? Reach out and grab things?

[KempsMama]

FWIW, DS#1 was 9 pounds at birth, and 26 pounds by 6 months. He is now 36 pounds at 2.

He was a little slower on his milestones, although he held his head up pretty early-but he didn't sit up well until 7 1/2 months, didn't crawl until 10 1/2.

He's tall too, although I don't have a height right now, but he's a beefy kid. And perfectly healthy.

The ONLY thing that concerns me about your friends babe is that he didn't hold his head up until 4 months. That seems WAY off to me. But the weight in and of itself doesn't concern me at all, especially since he's EBF.

[peaceful_mama]

I'd be concerned about the fact that he didn't hold his head up till about 4 months. That seems REALLY late.

Other than that, I used to work in a daycare, and I remember it seemed like the chubbier babies took longer to start rolling over and moving. Also, I remember a couple of fairly tall babies who were on the later end for walking. *That* wouldn't strike me as particularly unusual. *but* they all held their heads up....

[dogretro]

The head and the hands thing sound weird, but not the sitting up. Most babies are just starting to sit up w/ help from an adult at 6 months. If he's ebf, what is there to do? Maybe mom makes a lot of milk! Sounds like a check up would be good, but, again, what is there to say if he's ebf, unless they would want to test for something wrong.

[sapphire_chan]

It can take longer for bigger babies to do things, what concerns me is that from what you know he doesn't seem to be trying to do things.

[ameliabedelia]

Yes, that would concern me, a lot. Since, the baby has never seen a doctor, yes, I do think you would be "justified" in saying something. Now, the trick is how to do it tactfully and kindly. Maybe showing her a growth chart or some developmental milestones.

Here is the WHO chart for breastfed babies.
http://www.who.int/childgrowth/stand...boys_p_0_2.pdf

33 pounds =14.9 kg. At age 6 months, this puts him way, way, way, way, way off the charts

Plus, it is *very* late for a baby to now hold their head up until 4 months and it is pretty unusual for a 6 month old to *not* be interested in their hands, grabbing stuff, holding toys, etc.

My first baby was a big baby and later on the developmental milestone. At 6months she was about 21 pounds, which put her right at the "top" of the chart. She didn't sit unassisted until over 7 months, crawled at 10 and walked at 15. Yet, she was holding her head up well before 4 months certainly grabbing toys and playing with her hands and other objects at 6 months.

[ameliabedelia]

Also, when you say he is ebf.....do you mean "exclusively breast feed ONLY from the breast" or exclusively breast MILK fed but he does get some milk in bottles?? It IS possibly to *overfeed* a bottle, yes even if it breastmilk in a bottle.

[marisa724]

Originally Posted by ameliabedelia

Here is the WHO chart for breastfed babies.
http://www.who.int/childgrowth/stand...boys_p_0_2.pdf

33 pounds =14.9 kg. At age 6 months, this puts him way, way, way, way, way off the charts

That was my son! My doctor actually drew him his own line, he was essentially like two lines above the line for 95th percentile. What can I say, I make heavy cream or something! She remarked at his 18m visit, "hey, he's finally ON the chart!"

But back to the topic at hand, the fact that no one else is looking at this baby would concern me. We are relaxed about WBV (as is our doctor) and sometimes skip them entirely, but it's important to me to have another opinion, a second set of eyes to pick up on something I might have missed from being 'too close' to the situation.

[bobandjess99]

My dd was nearly that size..she was 31 lbs at 8 months, so i know the kind of hige you are talking about. she too was exclusively breastfed until solids and she was just huge. hoeever, her motor skills were all early, which is atypical. usually very heavy babies are a tad behind. If they have a naturopath they like and trust, I'd see if maybe they would just go ahead and do a "well baby" visit. Can't hurt for a second pair of eyes to see the kid, but yes, it very well could be he's normal.

[meemee]

i am kinda torn on this.

do you know if the naturopath has not seen the baby? even just going with the mom to see someone else in the family?

depending on how your relationship is i would be hesitant to talk to her. how do you show concern without sounding meddlesome. plus as a mother she should have a good idea of what ebf babies look like and the fact that her son is so big must stand out for her. i mean other bf babies around dont look quite that large.

[mbravebird]

Does she have oversupply? Sometimes babies dealing with oversupply will have to drink a lot of the foremilk in order to get to the hindmilk, where the fats are, which their body knows it needs. They will nurse until they get enough fat, even if it takes a huge amount of foremilk first.

I think this is part of what was going on with my first son. Both of my babies were big, but my first son nursed every hour and half around the clock and was 24 pounds at six months. I had big-time oversupply. Then I got acupuncture, and my breastmilk calmed down a bit, and he stopped gaining so quickly.

This time around, I found out that low magnesium can cause oversupply, so I supped with extra magnesium during pregnancy and postpartum, and I saw a huge difference. If I started getting oversupply-ish, I would dose with mag and within 8-12 hours it would be more manageable. My baby is big (I and my husband are very tall), but he grows at a much more normal rate than his brother did, and he is not all fat rolls. He's 21 pounds at 8 months.

If you'd feel comfortable asking about oversupply and suggesting magnesium, you could try that. I can't speak to the developmental milestones, although not holding his head up does seem significant. It could just be a combo of low muscle tone, which some babes have, and lots of fat, but it's hard to tell without an evaluation, of course.

The mag I used was Natural Calm (you can get it more affordably at iherb or vitacost). I also saw similar results from using nettle infusion, which has lots of mag in it. But when I hadn't made the infusion, I would just take the NaturalCalm.