Feeling like financial misfits among peers/friends/etc.. - Page 2

[ArtsyMomma]

Those little expenditures REALLY add up. A few years ago I tracked my spending for a few months, without really paying attention to what I was spending. At the end of a few months I went over the little notebook - I was spending roughly $400 a month on little things. I also realized that I didn't get $400 worth of satisfaction from those purchases. I now live off of roughly half of what my income was at that time, in some ways it is much harder but I'm so proud that I'm not digging myself deeper into debt. If I had $400 today....it would go straight towards debt. I'd get more than $400 worth of satisfaction from that.

[doubledutch]

i can totally see how that would be tight. i think our income is similar (i calculated your dh at 40 hours and you at 15 hours per week) although maybe you guys earn a bit more, but your mortgage payment is $400/month higher than mine, you have credit card payments, you may have a car payment, your student loan payment is probably higher than mine - i can't wrap my head around how i would manage all that on my income. so i don't think you're a financial dunce. you just actually do have high expenses for your income.

can you write up a budget? start with the things that are a set dollar amount each month. then for the things that are more flexible, like gas and groceries, don't write down what you think it is or what you want it to be. look at your bank account online for the past few months to figure out what you actually spend. it's a project, but you'll end up getting a way clearer picture of what your situation really is, and you'll probably be surprised at the money you could scrape together if you made an adjustment here and there.

[MommyDOK]

op, I am with you!!! We have the cheapest house in an above middle-class area. My neighbor's house payment is 1,000 more than mine...that's a lot of cash. We just refinanced to save 100 dollars a month and we are all thrilled bc that 100 bucks will be used very well.
I don't have much new advice. You've gotten some great ideas already. I would ditch the cell phone or get a pay as you go for emergencies only. I am doing that and I figure I will save quite a bit.

Eating out is tempting, but that was the first to go for me. I'd rather have a new sweater or a book than a meal I forgot about a month ago.

Hang in there. Have you read Dave Ramsey's books? Dh listened to it on a cd from the library and enoyed it.

I don't know what kind of car you drive, but we drive old and paid for cars. That helps. A car payment would be too much for us.

Dh says we need poorer friends bc it makes us feel better.

When I am feeling sad about money etc, I read old pioneer biographies or missionary autobiographies to foreign countries. When I see how these people lived, I am so amazed. Heck, just read LIttle House on the Prairie books.
Two things that I ask myself to help me NOT spend money: How did I survive without it? Do I really need it?

[claddaghmom]

OP, ignore your friends, tighten that belt buckle and start a budget! You can do it!

Since we got married, we got really serious about our finances. And then we got even more serious about finances when I was preggers w/ DD, b/c I wanted to SAH. It's meticulous, it requires planning and craftiness, but it does not have to automatically equal missing out on what you want in life. I think people assume we have a lot more money than we do, but they don't know all the careful planning and frugal steps we take to make things happen (e.g. house, new car, vacation...).