help? need research support for DH. he thinks i'm nuts for wanting to HS!

[BabyCrazy]

hi mamas,
i am just starting this journey. i want to HS and DH thinks i'm completly crazy. i was hoping that some of you great mamas could point me in the direction of research based articles?
thanks,
elizabeth

[Lillian J]

Here's the best collection of research I've seen: A legal abstract that was published in the Widener Law Review - Evidence for Homeschooling: Constitutional Analysis in Light of Social Science Research. The authors were careful to include only objective research and analysis rather than depending on opinions and anecdotes from homeschoolers.

This thread, "DH is *really* concerned about socialization*," has links to lots of other good ones in which a lot more than just socialization is discussed.

You'll find lots of references in those threads to two particular books that have helped others facing the same challenge you're dealing with:

• David Guterson wrote Family Matters: Why Homeschooling Makes Sense when he was teaching in high school while he and his wife homeschooled their own children.
• John Taylor Gatto, who was NY State Teacher of the Year right before leaving the system, wrote Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling.

And for a little fun, here's a good thread: Common misconceptions about homeschooling.

Also, take a look through this resource from the HomeSchool Assn. of California: A Professional's Guide to Working With Homeschooling Families. It has essays on:

• History and Philosophy of Homeschooling
• Socialization and the Homeschooled Student
• The Whole Child and Homeschooling
• Programs and Options in Homeschooling
• "Am I Really Qualified to Teach my own Children?": Some Thoughts on this Common and Provocative Question
• The Legality of Homeschooling
• Transitions to and from Homeschooling
• Home-Based High School
• Homeschooling the Special Needs Child

This doesn't seem like a good time to try to just give them to your husband to read, but a time to read them yourself, leave them lying around, and be able to talk to him with assurance and enthusiasm about what you've come across. I'd really drop the discussions until you're in a position of being able to articulately relate your ideas and findings on the subject with relaxed confidence. Otherwise, it can start out with arguing rather than open discussion, and then you'll be dealing with extra tension in subsequent discussion.

Lillian

[limette]

Have you asked him to research his opinion on this?

That's how I got dh on board. He couldn't find anything (research) to support his anti-schooling stance.

[kittie313]

What about suggesting a one year "trial" to see if homeschooling will in fact work for your family? I know that in my area, as long as we do a little math every day and read a little daily that really they don't miss much until they are in upper middle school or so. Then it would give you an opportunity to prove that it does work well and it isn't going to harm them.

[Reebekah]

would he be willing to read a few books on the subject? there are SO many good ones out there.......maybe get The Well Adjusted Child: the social benefits of homeschooling.................and one of the many books that are compilations of homeschool family stories (what our day looks like kind of stories)......and maybe just a good general book about homeschooling so he can see just how normal it really is. just search "homeschooling" on amazon.com and take a look at some of the many books available.

[starlein26]

What helped cement our committment to homeschool were John Taylor Gatto's books: Dumbing Us Down and Weapons of Mass Instruction.

[happy1nluv]

we're going thru the same thing here... so we have a date night planned in 3 weeks and we both need to have a 1 page writeup of reasons/research on our side (me pro hs, him pro public school) ... and we'll see where it takes us...

[karemore]

When DH suggested to me that we homeschool, I was the one who said he was crazy!!

Once I did some reading I was hooked. It also helps if he can talk to some people who are similar to you and your family who homeschool.

[BabyCrazy]

thanks

thanks mamas,
i'll start reading,that is info packed and i really need that. also love the date night idea(good luck to you). i do hate to start a conversation because i don't have much to talk about except, "i think it will be better", lol.....
he never blinked when i wanted homebirths (but i am a CNM).

[akichan]

I can't recommend the book Homeschooling: A Family's Journey by Gregory and Martine Millman. It is current, with references to major studies in recent years, and written beautifully. It is the first book I read about homeschooling and totally had me hooked. They are eclectic homeschoolers, and very inspiring. Seriously, I want my children to be as well-rounded as theirs. They make it sound idyllic to homeschool.

I'm totally writing down all these suggestions because I'm going to have to go to court to get permission to homeschool from my ex-husband.

[Momma Aimee]

subbing

[Curlyfry7]

also subbing

[4Blessings]

Originally Posted by Lillian J

Here's the best collection of research I've seen: A legal abstract that was published in the Widener Law Review - Evidence for Homeschooling: Constitutional Analysis in Light of Social Science Research. The authors were careful to include only objective research and analysis rather than depending on opinions and anecdotes from homeschoolers.

This thread, "DH is *really* concerned about socialization*," has links to lots of other good ones in which a lot more than just socialization is discussed.

You'll find lots of references in those threads to two particular books that have helped others facing the same challenge you're dealing with:

• David Guterson wrote Family Matters: Why Homeschooling Makes Sense when he was teaching in high school while he and his wife homeschooled their own children.
• John Taylor Gatto, who was NY State Teacher of the Year right before leaving the system, wrote Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling.

And for a little fun, here's a good thread: Common misconceptions about homeschooling.

Also, take a look through this resource from the HomeSchool Assn. of California: A Professional's Guide to Working With Homeschooling Families. It has essays on:

• History and Philosophy of Homeschooling
• Socialization and the Homeschooled Student
• The Whole Child and Homeschooling
• Programs and Options in Homeschooling
• "Am I Really Qualified to Teach my own Children?": Some Thoughts on this Common and Provocative Question
• The Legality of Homeschooling
• Transitions to and from Homeschooling
• Home-Based High School
• Homeschooling the Special Needs Child

This doesn't seem like a good time to try to just give them to your husband to read, but a time to read them yourself, leave them lying around, and be able to talk to him with assurance and enthusiasm about what you've come across. I'd really drop the discussions until you're in a position of being able to articulately relate your ideas and findings on the subject with relaxed confidence. Otherwise, it can start out with arguing rather than open discussion, and then you'll be dealing with extra tension in subsequent discussion.

Lillian

Highly recommend Family Matters

[Lillian J]

Originally Posted by Proud2BeAnAmerican

Highly recommend Family Matters

Yes! He wrote it in response to all the flack he was taking from colleagues and whoever... So it addresses the common criticisms people run into and then some. Lillian

[mum21andtwins]

Tell him to prove that PS will be better for your family than HS.I would not try to convince him I'd have him convince me and I bet he'll find nothing compared to what you can comeup with

[Harmony08]

Hold On to Your Kids by Gordon Neufeld isn't technically about homeschooling but it really makes it seem necessary.