What do you do when you are just over it?

[amberskyfire]

I don't mean my child, I mean doing childish activities I am SO not over my baby girl!

What do you do when you are just so sick of doing things with your little one and everything gets so boring that you want to rip your hair out? I suspect that the first thing people will say is to leave my daughter with someone else and go out somewhere alone for some "me" time, but I live out of state and don't have anyone here who can watch my child.

I'm a WAHM and lately I just want to things I'm interested in. I want to work on one of my own projects for hours at a time and just not think for a little while. I feel like if I have to take her outside, get out those darn paints, color with crayons, make up a new game, bake cookies with her, take her somewhere, play with her toys, or read her a book ONE MORE TIME, I am going to lose my mind!

I feel so bored the entire time lately and I usually sit and daydream about doing things I want to do like read or write a book or start a website or study to be a midwife.

Of course I know it's normal and there's nothing wrong with it, but it still makes me feel pretty crappy when I'm trying to entertain my daughter and it's really just going through the motions and I'm not enjoying it anymore at all

[WyattsMom2008]

Could you pay somebody to play with her while you do something? Do you live near a college with an education or nursing program? Maybe there is a nursing or education student who would love to play with children who could come into your home and play with your daughter. You might also see if your local hospital has a babysitting class. Sometimes hospitals will teach babysitting classes to teenagers.

[amberskyfire]

Originally Posted by WyattsMom2008

Could you pay somebody to play with her while you do something? Do you live near a college with an education or nursing program? Maybe there is a nursing or education student who would love to play with children who could come into your home and play with your daughter. You might also see if your local hospital has a babysitting class. Sometimes hospitals will teach babysitting classes to teenagers.

That is a really fantastic idea, but I am unfortunately penniless.

[kdtmom2be]

wish I knew...

[OTMomma]

The trick is to find something you enjoy doing that your child can do with you- or at least be along with you while you do it. Let your little one color while you work on your book idea, or plant a garden and let your little one be there with you.

I am giving you permission- you may do things for yourself, even if your child is right there with you. You may not be able to do it for hours straight, but you can do it. Your child doesn't have to have your full attention every moment of every day- as long as she is safe and clean and fed, its OK if you give her a pan of water to wash her doll in while you sit near by and read a grown up book- or knit or whatever makes you tick. I know when I take time to be Me, not just Mama, but ME, I feel happier, and can feel better about spending some time playing tea party later. Oh, and don't forget about nap time- nap time can totally belong to YOU. If that works best, use nap time to write or read or whatever, and let your little one help with the house work when she's up- tell her she's playing cinderella- its OK.

Motherhood is all about finding a balance. I find myself out of balance regularly, its hard to be a mom and not loose track of how to be yourself, but I pick myself up and try to do better tomorrow.

Peace,

[Breeder]

Yes ma'am, and amen OT Mama! That is exactly what I was going to write.

Being a mama does not mean being a constant playmate.

With my toddler I can still read, write (short spans of time obviously), hula hoop, study, make grocery lists, knit, draw etc etc etc.

As Tim Gunn says, I make it work!

[amberskyfire]

Ahhh...I should probably expound on my original post, then.

I work from home which means I am busy on the computer most of the time. I have to be. I really have no choice. We have to eat. This means that I don't get a lot of time to spend with my daughter, so when I'm not on the computer working, we do activities together. When I'm busy, she plays with her toys or colors or makes up new games. I just wish there was a minute of "me" time in there somewhere. Okay, more than a minute. I'd love to have time to not work or play kids' games. I do get a few minutes here and there and end up spending it watching birth videos on YouTube or something.

I've been getting a little bit of book reading in while nursing and I check out one child-safe movie from the library each week (like Little Women or Pride and Prejudice, something like that) and we watch it together, but I get so sick of it near about ten minutes in when she just hasn't stopped asking nonstop questions about the film.

Arrgh! I need a vacation! I guess, like they say, this too shall pass.

[almadianna]

The asking non stop questions about the film will only get worse so get used to that sorry.

I think wanting some "me" time is a constant thing that all parents want... sigh... however at her age she still needs you, especially if you spend so much time on the computer and not playing with her. Do you have a partner that can help? Family? Friends?

[MeepyCat]

I have, on occasion, allowed DS to spend hours - which is like a million years in toddler time - standing on the lid of the toilet and splashing in the bathroom sink, while I hang out in the kitchen (which is right outside the bathroom door).

If you drop your standards on movies, you may be able to find ones that she doesn't feel the need to ask you questions about. I love the Laurence Olivier Pride & Prejudice, but it does take some explaining (why do they all have to get married? what's everyone so upset about? aren't those the sets and costumes from Gone with the Wind?). Try something like <i>Babe</i> or <i>Kiki's Delivery Service</i>, or <i>Top Hat</i>. And when she does ask questions, give short, simple answers in an unexcited tone of voice. I have bought myself time to cook by letting DS pull all the measuring cups, a bunch of chop sticks and the ice cream scoop out of the drawer. I have amassed piles of small objects that DS can be asked to bring to the recycle bin one at a time. I have encouraged hiding (which DS is terrible at, but very amused by).