PPD? Questions....

[highlandmum]

Hello there mamas:-D
I had pretty minor ppd (mostly anxiety) after having my first, 4 years ago. When I had my second, I felt AWESOME, 2 years ago. I had my 3rd 5 mos ago, and I just feel so......I don't know. I didn't think it was ppd because it isn't how I felt after having my first. But I feel slightly depressed, kind of like I can't get out of a funk. But the thing that makes me worry I have ppd is that I worry about really insane things. Like, the world's going to end in 2012. ( I can stay up all night worrying about this ), that someone is going to kidnap my children (again, all night worrying), that someone is going to hurt my children, that my daughter's friend's dad is going to molest her if I let her go over there without me, that my son will stop breathing in his sleep, that someone is giong to hurt my children if I let them watch them(the kids). That there is a sniper on the roof and he is trying to kill me. Ok, I knew that one was crazy...but I serisouly worried about it. Tonight my husband is working till really late, and I am just worried that someone is waiting for this opportunity to come to our house and kill us all.
I mean, I know this stuff isn't logical. But I really worry about it. I am getting all worried sitting here writing it out....especially about tonight.
What is going on here?
**editing to add....I'm so embarrassed writing this out. I just know that something isn't right and these worries shouldn't be ruling my life, but they are. I just can't stop worrying about this crazy stuff!!!

[K-Mom3]

Those pervasive, irrational thought processes were a part of my ppd. It was the thing that most convinced me that something was wrong, actually. It felt so different from my normal thought processes and I couldn't get it to stop.

So yes, it is crazy to worry about that stuff. But no, you don't need to be embarassed about it in this forum because you're not alone! If you're still mostly functioning, *some* people might not diagnose you with ppd. But you can still do something to treat it. I haven't had good luck with doctors--the ones I have seen just want to write a prescription and do nothing else to help you. I had better luck educating myself with books.

Here are a few of the most helpful. I was able to find them at the library:
The Mood Cure--treating mental illness with supplements
The Natural Guide to Pregnancy and Postpartum Health--treating with diet, explains why your body and brain are more vulnerable after 3 pregnancies
Women's Moods--explains what is happening in your brain, presents a self care method to protect brain health

I also read books about women's individual experiences with ppd and those were helpful as well.

[Mosaic]

Postpartum Anxiety (PPA) is not as well-known as PPD, but it is common and definitely real.

http://www.healthyplace.com/anxiety-...rs/menu-id-69/

http://postpartumprogress.typepad.co...english-1.html

http://www.mothering.com/discussions....php?t=1203737

There are tons of resources out there about this, but it's important to know that you're not alone and there's no need to be embarassed. I certainly can't diagnose anything, but I would strongly encourage you to talk to your doctor because you know something isn't right, and you don't have to feel this way.

[highlandmum]

Thank you both for your replies. I ordered a couple of those books from the library, and just emailed my local (ish) chapter of POEM. We'll see how it goes! I'm just sure that I shouldn't be having all these crazy worries...not normal....ugh....

[otxena]

Having been through it, I wouldn't hesitate for a minute to get professional help were I going through it again in any form, anxiety or depression. Your children need you at 100%.

Good for you for getting on top of it. I wish I had.