night time ec -- i'm so tired

[fiikske]

Hi all,

here I am, a couple of months ago posting about my worries of EC'ing a little boy, and actually, the EC'ing went very naturally.. but now (DS is 4 months old), I'm kind of worried about our nights...

Let me first picture the previous weeks, because I think they are relevant...

- Daytime EC went fine (I always offered the potty at night, but he wasn't into it) until DS got a bit of a cold... fever and alike... and he was really not into in, so I dropped the EC for a couple of days...
- But then I wanted us to get back on track, and I noticed that he was usually going while nursing...
- so I decided, what the heck, and started nursing him while sitting at the edge of the bathtub, and cueing whenever I noticed he was peeing/pooing...
- In the meantime, we're truly back on track, and also during the night.. so he drinks, and I know he has to go, so I offer the potty (at the same time... without potty, he will fuss, and not do anything)...

But, the problem is, when he has to go during the night, he drinks, and he drinks quite a lot... so even though he has just peed, an hour later he has to go again, because he really really drank a lot... but then he drinks again, and wakes up soon later, again, for urgent peeing... and this is ok for one night, two nights, but now I am really really getting tired... ;-( and I don't know how to break this circle... when I offer the potty, without nursing, he gets angry... so what can I do?

The thing is, I have also the feeling that this nighttime nursing is also a bit of the age of 4 months thing. During the day, he starts to be more interested in what happens around him, than really drinking... so I think he drinks more at nighttime now to compensate...

I don't know..
the thing is, I'm getting tired... and the curse with EC'ing is that once you start listening, once you start hearing your baby making clear to you "MOM, I HAVE TO GO!", it is very very hard to stop listening... ;-(

warm regards,
Fiikske

[zoebird]

it's really not about "not listening." the whole thing is about figuring out what works for both of you.

when we were in a similar spot, i simply decided to stop night time EC. but, my baby did not like to be wet, and so i decided to use a high quality disposable diaper at night.

often, he would wake 1-3 times during the night, and i would potty him. but sometimes he had little pees in between those 1-3 times and those would be caught in the diaper, yet the diaper felt dry, so he was ok with that.

after a while, he would wake to go and be dry all night. today, he still wakes 1-3 times per night at 18 months. we now use cloth as a back up at night--his trainers. he's still dry all night this way.

it just works itself out. you'll find a way that works for you. this is not meant to be stressful or more difficult on anyone. it's meant to be easier. so if this part isn't making your life easier, find a way to make it easier.

[hrsmom]

Night time EC can be so rough!! Well, night time in general! You may have to try some different things before you find out what works for you and your LO. My dd was ok pottying at night, to a point, and then she wasn't. For months I would just change her diaper, like four times a night (she didn't pee each time she woke up, just some of the time!) My dd didn't want to pee in her diaper OR pee in the potty!

I would say this, if you are able to find a way for your baby to comfortably pee in a diaper at night, or pee on a loosely worn prefold diaper and you can switch it out (I'm assuming at four months that he doesn't flop all over the bed, but I could be wrong about that!) I would go for that.

[LCBMAX]

My exhaustion was such that I couldn't do ANY ec at night til after 15+ months I think. My son would just get so woken up from any toileting attempts that our nights would get worse than their usual awful. Cloth diapers leaked, which also caused a big wake-up so I used disposables for nights.

Then, one day, I realized that the disposables were regularly dry in the am - maybe one lightly used disposable per week, and that's a wake-up I can live with. At the same time, he started really refusing the diaper (having realized that diapers are for "babies".) We tried a naked sleep, but he peed more often that way. Same in the daytime - less misses when wearing underwear. At 2 now, we've gradually transitioned to cloth trainers at night. On the weekly occasion that he gets wet (no clear night signals, still!) I just pull them off, toss them toward the laundry, and we sleep naked for the rest of the night with no more wetting.

I think you're right on target about the 4 month old sleep thing - it is what it is. One trick that might work for your son to soothe him while peeing at night without nursing is a quiet dim light up toy. We have a ball that gently flows from soft red to blue to yellow etc, and this works as a peaceful distraction for my son when I need to leave the bed to pee myself, which would otherwise cause a tantrum.

I guess it can go any way with any kid, but when I would make myself feel badly for not doing ec at night, I would reassure myself with others' posts which all confirmed that each kid will do it when they can, and each mama must take care of herself first. Another big worry for me was that I would ruin or damage our daytime ec routine - not so. Even babies can distinguish between daytime toileting routines and nighttime toileting routines.

I really second the idea above that not doing ec at night is not not-listening. As a chronically sleep-deprived mama of a toddler, I applaud all methods that increase your sleep time!

Cheers.