more income, same budget

[jeteaa]

A few months ago we increased our monthly income by $1000 by renting out our "MIL suite". We now have the advised 6 months of living expenses in our savings and such things as a good retirement account, life ins etc. I feel we are in a healthy financial place right now. Plus, I'm a HSing sahm, so if things ever got rough, I could always use PS as child care and get a job if need be. THE ISSUE is with any extra money we have I don't want to spend it. ex: I really want a vacation, but the thought of spending even $1200 for a 2 week vacation on a beach (which is a good deal) makes me nervous. Funny thing is, we have never been in the position to do anything "extravagant" like a nice vacation, new car, new clothes, home decor etc. This issue probably should be in the mental health forum???? any thoughts on this?

[VisionaryMom]

We are approaching a similar place, though you are much more financially secure. DH's income (starting this month, so haven't received the first check yet) will be going up by $23,000 a year (and it was already pretty good to begin). He's also getting a $1200 bonus in April. We've thought of things we'd like to do (nothing more than about $500), but then we completely freeze up. It's an odd (but good) problem, but we're probably going to go at it gently. For example, we never stay in hotel rooms. We always camp, but we're going to do one weekend in a hotel or b&b (can't stomach more than that). We're just trying to approach things rationally.

[Youngfrankenstein]

What will you feel good about in the future? What do you "never have a chance" to do? For me, I'm all about buying something nice or fixing up a room. DH would travel, hands down.

Also remember that a beach trip can be done for the price that's a "good deal" but sometimes there are many more expenses on top of that. Is that okay with you? (eating out, rentals, gas, etc)

[Denvergirlie]

There is nothing wrong with spending money, especailly in your case where you are in a good set up for the future. You have the FFEF, you have retirement addressed. If you want to take a vacation, go for it!
I understand the issue with spending once in the place, it can be hard to "let go" and have some fun with money, it can be a mental health issue. We still have a lot of goals to pursue even thou we don't have debt and have money in the bank. We are also working on buying land and having money to outright build a house, we will need a car replacement soon as well as a few other big ticket items. With all of that looming on top, it's very hard to just "spend" even thou we have a good deal of positive cash flow.
Perhaps you could start sinking funds.... sink $200 a month into a vacation fund, and other funds (car replacement, mortage pay down, furniture replacemnt, etc, etc). When the money is there and given a name and you've saved for it, their is no reason to not proceed with having some fun. Fun is just as important as saving, quaility of life stuff and all that.

At least it's a good poistion to be in, congrats.

[tinuviel_k]

I absolutely get what you are saying. Sometimes once we get on the right track financially it is hard to let go and relax a little. But it sounds like you are in a great, responsible space money-wise, and it is a good thing to remember that in addition to saving for the future it really is important to enjoy life now. We should all plan responsibly like we are going to live till age 90, but the fact is that there are no gaurentees. We could have sixty years left, thirty, fifteen or less than one. Save responsibly, but also have fun now, enjoy life now, and build up some good memories! If you want to go vacation on th beach and have saved for it in a responsible way... then go and have fun!
You have good insurance, six months expenses saved, retirement building (and I am going to assume no consumer debt). It is okay to take a little extra money at this point and go enjoy.

I really recommend budgeting for an annual vacation fund. That is what we have started doing. Every month (after setting aside money for our budget, savings, etc...) we put $200 into a special "vacation savings account." After 12 months there is $2400 in there. That is our guilt-free money to use on an enjoyable vacation or two every year.

Budgeting for it monthly has made all the difference for us. We went from:
"Oh my God, I can't possibly take $1500 out of the next two pay checks to pay for a vacation, and I sure as heck am not going to digging into savings!!!"
to
"Ok, it looks like we have $1500 saved up in the vacation fund right now. Let's go ahead and plan on taking that Thanksgiving Disneyland trip that we were talking about a few months ago. We can buy the airfare and hotel now, and by the time the trip rolls around we'll have put enough money back in the vacation account to plan to visit your mother over spring break."

If you think about it, $200 isn't that big a chunk of your surplus $1000. While you would get $2400 to go on vacations with every year you would also have $9600 to put into savings every year. Sounds like a good deal to me!

[mtm]

You're in a great financial position and I'd go ahead and give yourself permission to start spending. You'll create great memories for your family.

[cristeen]

I completely understand where you're coming from. We've been in the "save, save, save" place for so long that when my DH offered to take me to Hawaii last year (after me wanting to go for years), I didn't take him up on it because of the $, even though we could have afforded it. Of course now we have an LO, so a trip to Hawaii is out for a while. Afraid I don't have any practical advice for you - just wanted to tell you that you're not alone.

[EmsMom]

You might want to ponder whether that beach vacation is really what you want. Maybe there are other things that are more compelling (me - I'd be crazy bored hanging out on a beach for more than a few hours...). Maybe a trip to Europe? Or Africa? Or a new hobby? Maybe $1200 might not go that far towards a trip to europe but if you wait a few months it will be more. I would suggest that so many people get caught up in the grind of spend, work at something they don't like, then vegetate so they can start up again. When you move out of the cycle, it is hard to know quite what you want. If you liked camping, $1200 might mean lots more weekend camping trips instead of one longer vacation. Or be able to invite some friends to come with you, your treat... you don't have to live like everyone else... you can decide what is best for you... and you will, once you get used to being able to make that choice.

[elbow]

You could always add to your food storage. I think food storage is a great way to save and prepare for the unknown.

[nudnik]

If it's because you're feeling guilty about spending on yourself, maybe you and your fam can decide on a charity to give something to ($50, $100 or even just $10) monthly. Once you're giving to others you might feel better about spending on yourself.