Originally Posted by almadianna
or it could be both.
my daughter got a great deal from being part of her brother's birth. she remembers it, talks about it, and it helped her understand a lot about where babies come from and being comfortable with her body. We still talk about how she was in the pool with mommy.
It is totally a personal decision and every family sees value in different things. i know some mamas really value alone time. my births were like a state fair!
That's kind of what I'm thinking. Lots of five year olds sometimes tell stories from when they were two and even relate details. Babies aren't born every day, well, YKWIM. It would be nice to have the true story of how little sister or brother joined the family be part of how he remembers our family story.
Dh had to leave town when ds was born. Ds was almost one week old when they met. Dh couldn't adore ds anymore if he caught him in the delivery, which was our birth plan.
In my case I'm not weighing the "bonding" factor of ds being there as heavily as I'm weighing the "life experience" factor for ds. To know exactly how, all of the sudden there's another person here. They don't need to know where babies come from at that age. I don't know if there is any real benefit. But it is a real life experience.
I just don't know if labor's going to take longer than he can handle being there, and if so, if he'd be comfortable sleeping in a strange place with that much action happening. I might ask someone else to go with us and watch him and leave if necessary so dh is free to stay and attend this birth. Last time it took four hours. The midwife said that second babies come faster.
I just don't know. Those waterbirths with the toddler in the pool and the dad there just look like such a memory. I've been debating this back and forth with myself every day.