Pre-K peer "pressure": chocolate milk

[staceychev]

My daughter just started at the public school Pre-K last week. Up until then, she had been at a private preschool/daycare, but I went on maternity leave and switched her to this.

I need some ideas for helping her cope with the fact that most of her classmates are getting chocolate milk and she's not. (Chocolate milk gives her stomach aches pretty much without fail.) She doesn't like the regular milk they serve, which is fine with me, because she drinks organic whole milk at home. I've offered to get her organic milk boxes to take, or even Honest Tea juice pouches, but she can't seem to move past the fact that "the other kids all have chocolate milk." I've even offered to have her get plain milk at school (if it's the coolness factor), but as I said, she doesn't like it. Her old preschool just had labeled cups for all of the kids and a water cooler that they could access whenever they wanted.

Any ideas for helping her move past this disappointment? Talking to her about her stomach aches, or organic milk doesn't seem to work. (Although she accepts that that's why she doesn't like the plain milk at school!)


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Mods: put this here instead of nutrition because it seems more about the peer pressure... thank you!

[zinemama]

She understands that the chocolate milk give her stomach aches. You have offered her alternatives. I think at this point it's just time to table this topic.

In your shoes, I would just stop engaging with her about it. If it were my kid, each time she brought it up I'd say, "We've talked about that, you know why you don't have the chocolate milk, and it's not something we need to talk about again." And swiftly move on to something else.

[Cascadian]

Is there a soy/carob alternative, even home made, that you can give her?

It's hard at this age when 'everyone else' gets to do something 'fun' and you don't. Instead of outright telling her the issue was 'over', I would try to find a midway point. Don't underestimate the power of peers at this age, or learning how to fit in and feel comfortable in a group. Sometimes I think we expect too much of wee ones, forgetting what it was like. Choose your battles - there will be others. Good luck!

[Llyra]

I agree with maybe looking into substitutes.

I'm no big fan of chocolate milk. My kids don't drink it at home, and I wouldn't offer it to them. But I also wouldn't let it be the hill I make my stand on.

DD1 flirted with a few types of junk food when she first started school, because of what the other kids brought with them, and I allowed it in moderation, and eventually she reached the conclusion that the foods I made are better, and now she gets the flavored milks a few times a month "for a treat," self-regulating all by herself.

I know they make flavored soy milks-- is it the milk, or the chocolate, that bothers her, do you think?

[hakeber]

Originally Posted by Llyra

I know they make flavored soy milks-- is it the milk, or the chocolate, that bothers her, do you think?

That's what I was wondering, because I know Silk makes a chocolate version, and I believe I have seen chocolate rice milk.

Maybe she would rather have a rumbly tummy and feel part of the gang, have you thought of letting her try it again just to reaffirm she hates it.

I'll tell you ds went through this exact same thing. he hates chocolate milk, but when he saw the kids at school have it, he was pretty sure he'd love it. i figured it couldn't hurt to let him try it once, so he tried it again with his classmates...yep, still hated, but he had plenty of takers for the rest which made him pretty popular for a moment.

Maybe another flavor milk, like strawberry or banana? or those yogurt drinks maybe?

[staceychev]

Unfortunately, it seems like the problem is milk+sugar, because she gets tummy aches from flavored yogurt too, so I don't know that the other flavors would work. And, we don't really do soy in our house, so soy milk isn't an option. I think I may have to take a hard line like Zinemama suggested...

[bobandjess99]

my dh is allergic/sensitive to cocoa, it gives him extreme stomach upset. Maybe you could put something else in a chocolate milk box?

[madskye]

What about going down the road that it's OK to not drink what everybody else is drinking? Is it really the choco milk she's bothered about, or that she's got something "different"?

[onthemove]

my dd's take strawberry or banana milk that we make at home, or if she can have almond milk at school the chocolate one is delicious!

we also like ovaltine cold but that still has sugar in it so it my not work for you.

[staceychev]

Well, I sent her with apple cider today in a bottle that she likes. There were some tears when I reminded her that she couldn't have chocolate milk, but she was happy to show her dad how she can pour the apple cider container by herself now.

Crisis might be averted (until peer pressure rears its ugly head next time)!

@Madskye: I think that's exactly the problem. She's in a new school and I'm hearing now about "all the other kids." Her old school provided snacks, but all kids brought their own lunches, so there wasn't as much of an issue.

[eepster]

Have you tried alternative brands of chocolate milk? Ceaper brands (which I'm guessing the school tends to use) can have odd ingredients like guar gum. It might be one of the odd ingredients that are causing the issue, not a simple ingredient like sugar. Flavored yogurts often have these ingredients as well.

Horizon, Trader Joes and many others make organic chocolate milk that come in little boxes with straws.