Is an 11-year-old old enough to...

[annettemarie]

drop off at the movies with a friend? He really wants to go see Diary of a Wimpy Kid, and I would rather lick the floor then sit through that. But I could maybe drop him off with his buddy, do a little shopping, and then pick him up when it's over.

[chfriend]

Unless I had concerns about irresponsibility when combined with that friend, I'd drop off pretty close to the start of the movie and be there for pick up 5 minutes before it let out without worry.

I'd also lend my kid one of our cell phones.

[zinemama]

Well, if my 10-yo can walk 9 blocks to and from his guitar lesson by himself, I feel pretty confident that your 11-yo can be trusted to sit on his tush in a theater for an hour or so.

[philomom]

Yes. No problem.

[Sharlla]

I would feel comfortable with that. I would probably leave a cell phone with him just in case.

[annettemarie]

Thanks, all! Growing up I had very unreasonable expectations placed on me at a very young age-- at 8 I stayed alone with my sister who was three years younger until 2 or 3 in the morning-- so sometimes I like to check my expectations against others just to be sure I'm on target.

[eclipse]

I was around that age when my mom started dropping me at movies with friends, and we never got outselves into any trouble.

[Ornery]

Yep, I'm pretty sure it was around that age or even a little younger that I started dropping my ds off with his friends to watch movies. Always with a cell phone though and with an understanding of where I was going to pick them up after the movie and that they were to come straight out.

[CarrieMF]

He really wants to go see Diary of a Wimpy Kid, and I would rather lick the floor then sit through that

lol, my 11yo wants to see it too. If it weren't for her younger sisters(who also want to see it) I'd drop her off.

She has her own cel. I'd definitly go over the rules of being in the theatre though.

[ollyoxenfree]

Generally, I'd say it's okay.

It really depends on the child - and his friends. He may be trustworthy. If the friends are disruptive though, and get into trouble, he may find himself guilty by association, even if he's behaved well himself.

[Oubliette8]

I just wanted to say to make sure you check with the movie theater first. One near me has a rule that no one under, I think its 18, is admitted without a parent. To ANY movie. Its really unpopular rule, and its been in the paper several times over the rule, but thats how they choose to do business. Apparently they were having problems with disruptive teenagers. I would check before dropping him off, I'd hate for him to be disappointed if there is some sort of age restriction imposed by the theater that you didn't know about beforehand. Otherwise, if he's a responsible kid, I think he should be fine.

[karne]

Actually, some of the theaters here have the same rule. Shopping malls too-I think large groups of kids can't roam unattended.

My 11 y/o doesn't have a cell phone, and I haven't wanted to go down that road yet. At the same time, I'm not comfortable dropping her anywhere without a way to reach me. Personally, I'll probably wait another year before doing this. 11 is still young, and I worry about other people.

[enkmom]

When mine were 10 and 11 I let them go to movies together, back in the days before everyone had a cell phone. I went in with them and bought their tickets, and checked exactly what time the movie would be over. Then I would be back to pick them up 5 minutes before the movie let out. There was never, ever an issue, and they knew if they misbehaved this freedom would be taken away.

[nextcommercial]

I would go up there and buy them the tickets. (To be sure they can get in) Then, I would leave and enjoy my shopping trip.

[wemoon]

Originally Posted by karne

Actually, some of the theaters here have the same rule. Shopping malls too-I think large groups of kids can't roam unattended.

My 11 y/o doesn't have a cell phone, and I haven't wanted to go down that road yet. At the same time, I'm not comfortable dropping her anywhere without a way to reach me. Personally, I'll probably wait another year before doing this. 11 is still young, and I worry about other people.

What we have done for the cell phone situation (because I'm with you... I don't think my kids need their own personal cell phone), is got an additional line and the phone is essentially the 'house phone' since we don't have a landline. Then if they do go somewhere alone they can take the phone with them, but otherwise, it stays at home. It has worked out very well for us.

[aussiemum]

I have recently let my 11 year old go to the movies on her own with her 'boyfriend'. It's all very sweet & innocent, really they are just friends & have had that friendship since pre-school, so it's not a big deal. She even took her little brother to a movie he really wanted to see on one of these movie 'dates'. I drop them off at the theatre, they buy their own tickets & i am there to pick them up in the theatre lobby about 5 minutes before the movie ends. She feels very responsible & trust-worthy, which is age appropriate for her level of development. I also know the lad & his parents very well, & we are all in agreement that going to the movies together is okay. hth.

[mamazee]

Absolutely. By before that age we were walking with no adult blocks and blocks away to a movie theater on a regular basis to watch movies. It's sad to me that our society has gotten so paranoid that we even question whether a pre-teen can handle watching a movie without a parent.

[annettemarie]

Originally Posted by mamazee

Absolutely. By before that age we were walking with no adult blocks and blocks away to a movie theater on a regular basis to watch movies. It's sad to me that our society has gotten so paranoid that we even question whether a pre-teen can handle watching a movie without a parent.

In case you missed my above post, it's not that I am paranoid. My mother was extremely neglectful as a child and allowed me to stay home alone with my young sister until two or three in the morning when I was only 8. I had a lot of unreasonable expectations placed on me as a very young child, and one of the reasons I am thankful for the internet is that it allows me to doublecheck my perceptions against the norm. Please don't be sad for me, but also don't assume that I am acting out of paranoia.

[annettemarie]

Additionally, to be clear, I am not worried about their behavior-- they're both great kids-- or the movie content, although I'm sure it will garbage, LOL! My biggest worry (and it's not keeping me up all night or anything) would be other people being weird or rude or whatever.

Nextcommercial, I think that's just what I'll do-- go in with them to buy the tickets and then have a blissful hour and a half at Target and Borders.

[aussiemum]

Well, I know in our case there was a bit of concern that prior to now DD wouldn't know what to do if the movie didn't show as planned or some other unforseen event. Now I am sure that she would just ring home to be picked up early. I just didn't want her wandering out of the movie theatre & down a city street with no idea what to do or how to get home. Now I am sure she would be fine with sudden changes. I do still worry a bit, of course (what if the movie theatre catches on fire? What if the movie she wants to see is sold out & they go to a different one? What if, what if?!?) but I know I have to let go in small ways to let her grow, kwim?