Our son is due in just a few weeks now, and though I've known we wouldn't circ, I still wanted to have more of a "final" discussion with dh about this so it wouldn't be hanging over us and causing tension at the hospital.
Dh admitted that there really wasn't a reason to do it, and that if I said I didn't care at this point, he's not sure if he would be able to go through with it anymore. He did point out how hard this is for him, because the whole discussion forces him to think for the first time in his life about this being done to him, and that it wasn't right (he still uses the asinine argument that he doesn't hurt anymore, so it can't be that bad, right? I guess that is a defense mechanism in his head because it makes no sense!). He still can't quite admit that it is a "wrong" thing to do, but then I didn't expect that. He said it feels like a tribal custom that we are not participating in. While that is no reason to do it, to me, all the medical/cleaning/locker room stuff is garbage. THAT is the real argument in a nutshell. I asked him how he felt about that and he said it mainly just feels like a huge paradigm shift... something that just was is now something he has to question, and it is uncomfortable. I am proud of him though, that he has come far enough from being totally for circ and not thinking about it to at least admitting it is unnecessary surgery.
Dh admitted that there really wasn't a reason to do it, and that if I said I didn't care at this point, he's not sure if he would be able to go through with it anymore. He did point out how hard this is for him, because the whole discussion forces him to think for the first time in his life about this being done to him, and that it wasn't right (he still uses the asinine argument that he doesn't hurt anymore, so it can't be that bad, right? I guess that is a defense mechanism in his head because it makes no sense!). He still can't quite admit that it is a "wrong" thing to do, but then I didn't expect that. He said it feels like a tribal custom that we are not participating in. While that is no reason to do it, to me, all the medical/cleaning/locker room stuff is garbage. THAT is the real argument in a nutshell. I asked him how he felt about that and he said it mainly just feels like a huge paradigm shift... something that just was is now something he has to question, and it is uncomfortable. I am proud of him though, that he has come far enough from being totally for circ and not thinking about it to at least admitting it is unnecessary surgery.
