How do you gently offer support for BFing?

[justKate]

Let me preface this by saying that I'm not a confrontational person and don't want to attack anyone or lose any friends over breastfeeding, because I do believe it is a personal choice.

That being said, how do I offer support to friends/acquaintances who are all too willing to "give up" on breastfeeding?

Example: Huz goes to school with a woman I've met a few times. She mentioned to him that she was stopping breastfeeding her 2 month old because it was "just too hard." Huz was concerned enough to mention it to me, but really, what can I do/offer? Is it any of my business, anyway?

[It doesn't surprise me that she mentioned it to him, because he's very in to babies and strongly supports our parenting decisions, like extended BFing, cosleeping. And he's just the kind of person that people talk to, for some reason. ]

Other example: My best friend is TTC and is strongly opposed to BFing any babies she has, I think due to abuse/trauma she experienced as a child/teen. How do I lead her down the road to BFing? Or should I just leave it alone? I dont' want to jeopardize our friendship...

Any thoughts are appreciated!

[doubledutch]

i would say, "that sounds like a tough decision. if you want to talk about it, i'm here!" otherwise, i wouldn't say/do more than that unless they ask for help to be able to breastfeed.

it's a difficult position to be in. on the one hand, there is this potential for you to be able to support either one of these women in a succesful breastfeeding relationship. on the other hand, she has to want that herself - and if she doesn't, your offer of support is not going to come across that way to her. try to support the woman, herself, rather than supporting the outcome you would like for her and the baby.

[amydiane]

I don't have any advice for you, but I've been thinking about this a lot myself, lately. I'm not sure how to be encouraging without being pushy (not to say that it can't be done, just that I don't personally know how to do it). So I'm interested in suggestions, too.

[jillmamma]

I would just say something like, "those early days nursing a newborn are tough, right?" or "It sounds like you have given your baby a great start." and leave it at that. I figure I don't want people giving me crap for nursing my kids for 4.5 YEARS each "too long", so I don't want to do it to them for not doing it for long "enough". I figure, at least they TRIED, and I know different people have different experiences, and not everyone has as easy of a start or as much determination to keep going at it as I do.