Need help with blessingway ideas

[jennmiller]

I would like to have a very brief blessingway with just a few friends. Since I don't know anyone who has ever had a blessingway of their own that I could ask to lead it for me, I'll be doing it myself. I need some ideas for a non-pagan ceremony, as I don't subscribe to any particular religion, though I do meditate and practice mindfulness.

Here are some things I'd like to do during the ceremony but don't really know how to go about doing them. These aren't really in any particular order.

1. Meditate
2. Have each guest light a candle that will be used at the birth.
3. Have each guest share her favorite memory of giving birth.
4. Tell each guest why I thought it was important to invite her.
5. Invite guests who brought written blessings and/or beads to share them.
6. Discuss my fears surrounding giving birth again, the post-partum period, and transitioning into being a mother of two. Hopefully they can offer some wisdom here.

I am a bit nervous about leading this myself, but if I want this to happen I don't really see another way. So I need some really clear direction. Here are some questions I can think of now:
1. How should I open the ceremony?
2. What should the focus of the meditation be?
3. How do I lead the part about discussing my fears?
3. How can we close the ceremony in a way that doesn't introduce any particular religious philosophy?

TIA!!

[athenalove46]

I found a cool link with some ideas: http://autonomousbirth.blogsome.com/58/

http://www.birthbeads.com/Blessingway.html

Good luck!

[kimlynn]

is there anyway for you to split up your wonderful ideas and have each of your invitees lead an activity? i only suggest this because as i was planning my blessingway, i had one friend who pointed out that this ceremony was meant to nurture me...and how could it be that way if i was the one tasked with organizing and leading the ceremony?? my girlfriends ended up pooling together and hiring a facilitator who does blessings so that i/we can be fully present.

[isras1]

Good advice Kimlynn. It is great that you are taking the initiative and planning your ceremony. With it all planned out, you can then clearly explain how each friend can participate/lead in the ceremony. I think that by having your friends facilitate the party will enhance the bonding and sacredness of the event. I highly recommend this book, Mother Rising: The Most Complete Guide to Blessingways/


You could open and close the ceremony by using this idea:

~ "A ball of beautiful string (hemp is durable and works well) is used to connect each woman's wrist to one another's in the circle - a web of womanhood. When the cord connects all of you, explains that this unites you all as sisters and represents the circle of sisters and the circle of life. Then you cut the cord, leaving enough length to tie the ends into a bracelet. Explain that though it appears we were then separate, the bracelet reminded us as women, we were all cut from the same ball of yarn. You may suggest that the women wear the bracelet until the birth as a reminder of the strength a group of women can hold for a birthing mother."
http://thebirthsource.homestead.com/blessingway.html

We did this for my friends blessingway, it was lovely. We all wore the string bracelet until she gave birth. One friend's string broke and she immediately called the pregnant friend, inquiring if she was in labor. She wasn't, it was funny.


After the ceremony, some of the activities we've done at friends Blessingways were: belly cast, maternity photo shoot, henna drawing on momma's belly, foot washing, massage, and of course eating good food (potluck style) and cake (we had one made into the shape of a pregnant goddess).

[zinemama]

Just FYI...you might want to retitle this, calling what you're planning a Mother Blessing. Blessingway is the term for a Navajo ceremony, which it doesn't sound like you have in mind.

Your ideas sound very nice. I went to one where we ate a cake shaped like breasts and a belly!