Feeling scared...

[Freedom~Mama]

Just in need of some reassurance today. Feeling kind of sad and lost. I have two LOs and have them 90% of the time. I am going to school and have about 5 years left to go (am set on getting my Masters) and I am just feeling overwhelmed and doubting myself. Any of you have days like that? How do you get through it?!

[JunipersMom]

Yup - no words of wisdom.. time is the only thing working for me right now. I keep waiting for all this to get easier ~ it just doesnt. Hopefully it can help to know you're not alone..

[sparklefairy]

"just keep going" is all I really have to offer. I'm sorry :-(
It takes time, seemingly forever when you're in the thick of it.
I'm on my fourth of six semesters for undergrad (I already had a year when I started this time) and want to get a Master's also. It's starting to feel like the end will come someday!

[Theia]

On those days I do the bare minimum as far as taking care of the daily mundane things. I try to find something fun for DD and I to do. A special treat for dinner, or a no cook meal like nutbutter and jelly sandwiches. You are on your own now. If you leave dirty dishes for the next day, it sucks that they will still be there in the morning, but at least no one but yourself is fussy about them.

I hope you know this is normal and it will pass. You can do this, and your LO's will thank you for it.

[josybear]

i'm in a nearly identical boat (except my babies are boys, not girls) and what's mostly worked for me over the past year is having days where i let myself feel the sadness, the overwhelmed-ness, all that. i read smutty paperbacks and eat chocolate and despair, but then the next day i get up and get on with it.* i can't be strong all the time, and i don't need to try. i'm doing well. my kids are happy and well fed, my house is less of a disaster than it could be, i'm getting through school one semester at a time. in the end it will be ok, but it's ok to have a day of wallowing now and again.

*when i get bcak on my feet and get on with life i have to work extra hard for a little while to compensate for my day of uselessness, but it feels a little easier. it works for me.

[justmama]

Originally Posted by Theia

On those days I do the bare minimum as far as taking care of the daily mundane things. I try to find something fun for DD and I to do. A special treat for dinner, or a no cook meal like nutbutter and jelly sandwiches. You are on your own now. If you leave dirty dishes for the next day, it sucks that they will still be there in the morning, but at least no one but yourself is fussy about them.

I hope you know this is normal and it will pass. You can do this, and your LO's will thank you for it.

yeah me too. I have 3 little girls and sometimes it's so completely overwhelming. Like right now. I have poison ivy and it's that time of the month. Plus my 2 year old is cutting molars and my 9 year old is getting 2 teeth pulled this week plus an appt for ADHD diagnosis. And the 5 year old is just a daily challenge as it is. Plus their dad won't see them all week until the weekend because of work obligations. So I'm overwhelmed and frustrated and so I am making chili for myself and my oldest is 9 and contributing her famous chicken noodle soup for the 3 of them for dinner. I plan on leaving dirty dishes in the sink, leaving diaper laundr until tomorrow, and watching a movie with them tonight and a hot cup of chai tea. that's all I can manage right now.

[Super~Single~Mama]

Being a single mama in school is so hard! I'm just taking it one day at a time. I try to get things done that must get done that day, and then I go to bed when the little one does. Its so hard, but you can do it!

And, one thing at a time. Don't think 5 years till I have my masters! Think, 3 years till my BA! Don't stress yourself out over needing a masters until you have your BA - then you will apply for your masters, and once you get into a masters program stress over that. One step at a time. You'll get there!!

[Freedom~Mama]

Thank you. I have been having a really hard time lately and I just feel so stressed and burnt out. The tough thing is that I am staying with my parents and they expect their house to be immaculate at all time so it really isn't an option to let anything go and I know that is why I am getting so stressed because it is hard to handle that, the girls, and school. My oldest is at least in pre-k for a half a day 4 days a week but my youngest is with my all the time and is very busy. I knew going into this (single motherhood) that it would be really tough but I am just feeling overwhelmed and exhausted.

[ArtsyMomma]

hang in there.

When I'm overwhelmed, I stay up really late and read a good book, have a cup of hot cocoa. Or I take a hot bath and just veg. It's a bummer to be tired the next day, but it's great to get some time to relax.

I'm a bit of a planner. Making lists eases my stress, so I'll make lists of the things I need to do, I'll update my day planner. Once something is written down I don't have to worry/think about it anymore.

[Theia]

Oh, that's right. You are staying with the parents. Maybe you could talk with them (are they supportive generally?) and let them know you are just a bit overwhelmed and need them to understand/remember what life is like with LO's. Actually I am sure you are beyond a little overwhelmed.

Can I suggest you be more proactive with the place you are seeking to go to next? Call them and bug them a lot. Let them know you are scared and need services. That is what they are there for. I would suggest calling them minimum 2x week, but 3 or more would be better. Don't fade into the background "waiting" for them to have a slot available. Advocate for yourself mama.

[LorenaAZ]

I'm also a full time student and I have a 1 yr old. A few things that I do when I get overwhelmed are: call my dad and tell him about it (just telling someone helps, perhaps talk to a friend?), I clean, I go out alone (just a few minutes is enough), go to the movies. I have no family around and have my little one all the time. I adore her, but when exams and deadlines roll around and she demands my undivided attention it can get stressful. Can your parents babysit for you? Maybe you can go to the movies, out for a little walk?
Also, taking it day by day helps. If you think you have 5 years 'till you are done with school it seems like so far in the future! Think of how long you have left of undergrad? Or for this semester to end? And think of how much you've already accomplished!

I hope you feel better the rest of the week.