Another sleep issue thread....help?

[melon]

my son is almost one, and he will NOT stay asleep.
The only way he falls asleep is nursing (or in the car sometimes).
We get up around 9 am...he's been taking one 45-90 minute nap a day, around 3-4 pm, and then he's up sometimes till midnight. I finally nurse him down, and 15-60 minutes later, he's awake. He usually nurses right back down, but some nights (like last night), he wouldn't sleep without my boob in his mouth (not necessarily nursing, just boob in mouth). I had to stay in the same position all night...every time i rolled over, he woke up, whining.
He will not take a pacifier. We've tried introducing comfort items, a lovey, etc...they just don't stick. he's completely uninterested in them.
During the day, he is happy and active, until seemingly, the switch flips and he's tired...at which point he asks for milk, and usually nurses to sleep fairly quickly. It seems like he gets enough sleep.

i hope this makes sense. please forgive me, i'm a bit sleep deprived.

any advice is appreciated!
TIA....

[majormajor]

is midnight to 9 am a typical night's sleep? and then a 45 to 90 minute nap? it sounds to me like he might not be getting enough sleep. i think at this age the average is 12 hours. ok i just googled it and apparently the normal range is huge, anywhere from 8 to 16 hours a day. well that's no help!

can you try putting him down for a nap earlier? i'm a big fan of keeping our bodies' clocks in line with the natural day, and i think it's important for kids too. so if i were you, i'd be aiming for an earlier bedtime, earlier nap, and earlier wakeup. that way your son will get the most natural light possible, and that might help his internal clock out.

in our house, we do only dim lighting in the evening. my girls don't have a curtain in their room, so they get help waking up from the sun. they go to sleep between 7 and 9 and wake up around 7 - 8 in the morning. the little one takes about a half hour nap at noon-ish (she's 21 months, and she's never been much of a napper).

all that said, neither of mine have been great sleepers! so i totally feel your pain. the younger one wakes up a lot at night and until recently (like 2 weeks ago) could sleep with my nipple in her mouth all night. she also likes to sleep on top of me. i am constantly exhausted too. i drink a lot of coffee! i'll be watching this to see if you get any advice that i can use too!

[melon]

thanks for your response...
It also seems to me that he's not getting enough sleep....but he doesn't act sleep deprived....his dad needs less sleep than i'm used to, so maybe it's heriditary?

these times are pretty typical for him...we usually try to start getting him down around 8-9...he just won't.
a couple of nights a week i work and grandpa brings him home around 8-9....he falls asleep in the car and we leave him sleeping in his bucket seat, but he wakes back up for daddy by 10 ish, and is usually still up when i get home at 11 ish, sometimes later.
i also try for an earlier nap, but he won't have it. he just FIGHTS sleep. if he's in the car he will sometimes nap earlier. but it doesn't seem to make a difference at night. occasionally, if nap is earlier, there will be a second nap around 4-5.

just a bit more info: his 4th tooth just came in...teething hasn't been too bad.
...he is walking a lot now...and starting to communicate more with pointing, and an occasional sign, and lots of babbling.
and the past few days we've spent a lot of time outside--i thought the fresh air would help....nope.

argh!

[majormajor]

my older daughter was more like your DS. she usually went to bed around 10 at that age and woke up 8 ish, with one 48 minute nap (i swear, you could set a clock by it!). by 18 months though she was actually sleeping better. now at 4 she sleeps 12 hours at night and only sometimes wakes me up. haha! my mother tells me that by kindergarten she'll stop waking up.

[marispel]

What is your daily routine look like? If you DS is falling asleep when Grandpa is bringing him home, that sounds like that would really mess up with his bedtime.

As far as only sleeping w/boob. Have you tried different types of pacificers? My DS ONLY wanted the paci that he got at the hospital. We tried so many other kinds...but only wanted the Gumdrop.

[spmamma]

Originally Posted by melon

we usually try to start getting him down around 8-9...he just won't.

Have you tried getting him up early as well? It may help to start waking him up at an earlier hour so that his body needs to go to bed earlier each night. I'm sure you'd have to do this for several days/weeks as you work to change his routine.

That might at least get him on an earlier routine... not that it solves your nursing/holding the boob in his mouth all night long problem. But it might help with getting him to bed earlier.