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First time parents thread - Page 6

post #101 of 135
Are there things you and your partner don't agree on as far as parenting goes, and how are you going to handle that?
I am so happy/thankful that we agree on nearly everything. And not just parenting-related.

How do you expect this baby to change your existing relationships?
I am afraid, very afraid, that it will push our relationships with our families to a breaking point. I worry about this more than anything. DH and I are very different from our respective families, and while there have been some blowouts over it, mostly they've been content to just let it go, drop the subject, etc. I am afraid they won't take that approach any longer once a baby is involved, since, in their minds, we will be possibly endangering another human.

Are any of you in maternity clothes yet?
I would be in maternity pants, if I wore pants. Since I mostly just wear skirts, I am still able to fit in my normal stuff. I did wear jeans the other day, though, and definitely needed the belly band!

What have you bought so far for the baby?
Nothing, since we got the +. We have collected a few things over the past couple of years, though. Since we loathe 95% of baby clothes we have picked up random things we liked on sale and also some discounted wooden toys.

Anyone have any news on the movement front?
Maybe? I am so unsure. Like someone else mentioned, I feel something but as soon as I focus on it, it stops. I'm 16wk4d today, so, soon, please!

Anyone getting any child raising advice yet?
Not really, no. No one has gotten past our crazy ideas about pregnancy and birth to even dare to contemplate what ideas we might have about actually raising the kid.

Anyone have a stranger notice your expecting?
Not yet. I am just now starting to show a bit, and only if you're looking for it, I think.

Whats everyone craving?
Refried beans. For a while I thought it was Mexican food generally, until I realized, no, cooking Mexican food at home doesn't work. Why? Because my refried beans suck. I am thinking of going to my favorite restaurant and just buying a half gallon or something. Yum!!! I mean, protein, right? lol
post #102 of 135
Welcome APBTLover! I'm just one day ahead of you(16w5d today!)
post #103 of 135
Quote:
Originally Posted by APBTlover View Post
[B]

Whats everyone craving?
Refried beans. For a while I thought it was Mexican food generally, until I realized, no, cooking Mexican food at home doesn't work. Why? Because my refried beans suck. I am thinking of going to my favorite restaurant and just buying a half gallon or something. Yum!!! I mean, protein, right? lol
I cheat on my refried beans at home but they are so yummy. I buy a can of fat free refried beans at the store (they have the least amount of crap in them), then at home I cook them on the stovetop and mix in massive quantities of good butter. You will be amazed to watch a stick of butter be able to disappear into a can of beans but it's SO GOOD.
post #104 of 135
Quote:
Originally Posted by mesa View Post
Thread crashing for a moment (sorry )....but I just had to chime in and agree with this. I STOOD for 2 hours the other day, coming home from Seoul, next to the "mothers with small children, pregnant mothers, and elderly/infirm" seating, which was populated with 4 business men, none of whom fit the requirements for the seats. I held my 2 year old daughter in her Ergo the entire time. People are INCREDIBLY rude about giving up their seats here.
I once stood up to give an obviously pregnant woman my seat on a streetcar, and as I tapped her on the shoulder to show her the seat, a teenaged boy squeezed in behind me and swiped it.

I could. not. believe. it. He even tried to pretend like he didn't understand what I was saying when I said "I got up to offer her my seat, you need to move and let her sit." He was all "No, man, it's my seat now."

He did get up, she sat. I hate people some days.
post #105 of 135

Not quite feeling like a mama yet...

Ha--glad to hear that I'm not alone in NOT feeling like a mama quite yet. I was talking to my partner a couple of weeks ago about how I don't feel super attached to the fetus yet. I would be devastated to lose the pregnancy, but more because of the loss of potential. I mean, I am really excited about having a baby, and I know I'll love the baby, but I don't have this idea of the fetus as a separate, autonomous person with a personality at this point in time. I'm sure that will come later. But in the meantime, sometimes I feel like I'm missing some baby-lovin' gene that would allow me to talk about "the baby" instead of thinking about it clinically as a fetus. I'm sure it doesn't help that I'm a nurse practitioner and so I tend to look at a lot of what my body is going through with a clinical lens.
post #106 of 135
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redheadnurse View Post
I mean, I am really excited about having a baby, and I know I'll love the baby, but I don't have this idea of the fetus as a separate, autonomous person with a personality at this point in time. I'm sure that will come later.
I call mine "my fetus" or "my baby" but I don't see that as a reflection of how much personhood i have endowed it with.

At this point, regardless of whether we call it the baby or the fetus, it ISN'T a separate, autonomous person with a personality. It isn't. It's a very efficient parasite that is totally part of me and that I love very much, but we're not separate.

I don't know if I already feel like a parent. I don't know what that feels like.

I am very much convinced that having an outside baby is very, very different from having an inside baby, and I'm along for the ride. It will be what it will be, and I have every confidence that it will be wonderful and terrible and the most amazing and the hardest thing ever, all at the same time.
post #107 of 135
Anyone have any news on the movement front?

I would like to change my previous answer to "Yes!" This Friday while sitting in class I was finally able to focus on the little nudges while they were happening. Definitely not gas or peristalsis. I think I can safely say the little booger has legs and/or elbows!
post #108 of 135
Thread Starter 
Bump

Yay for movement outlier!! None yet for me.

We have another midwife appt on Monday and will get to hear the heartbeat, hopefully. That should be fun!

How's everyone doing? Anyone know the sex yet?
post #109 of 135
Definite movement now!
Just today I had the first movement where it seemed to be related to something, my bff and I got real cherry lemonade(Ive been craving cherries since day one but have only seen them once, which was at Whole Foods and they were outrageously priced so I didnt get any.) and Im drinking it and suddenly its like someone was rolling a marble on my insides! Obviously Im going out tomorrow and buying some cherry juice and lemons so i can see if it was a fluke or if I have found hir first fave food!
post #110 of 135
How's everyone doing? Anyone know the sex yet?

We just found out Friday that it's a girl! We're so happy and excited to meet our DAUGHTER this fall!!!

As far as movement, I definitely have been feeling her, but nothing more than subtle, intermittent flutters at this point. Hopefully will get more substantial and consistent soon. DP is dying to feel her from the outside!
post #111 of 135
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lyndzies View Post
How's everyone doing? Anyone know the sex yet?

We just found out Friday that it's a girl! We're so happy and excited to meet our DAUGHTER this fall!!!

As far as movement, I definitely have been feeling her, but nothing more than subtle, intermittent flutters at this point. Hopefully will get more substantial and consistent soon. DP is dying to feel her from the outside!
Congrats!

I've been feeling a lot of movement for the last week. I keep feeling it change positions throughout the day. I felt it doing a lot of rolling a few days ago which was very fun to feel because it felt a lot stronger than the other little kicks and jabs and turns I'm feeling this week.

Ok, here's another question for the group.

Which aspects of your parents' parenting would you like to to replicate or avoid?
post #112 of 135
Quote:
Originally Posted by macy View Post
Congrats!

Which aspects of your parents' parenting would you like to to replicate or avoid?
Even though my mom was definitely the "parent" and I was the "child" in the relationship growing up... she did a lot of things "with" me as a child... we roller skated together... colored together... watched musicals and sang together... cooked together... and talked about which boys were cutest when I got to be a preteen (although she never agreed with me)... to the point that I had more fun doing "kid stuff" with her than even my friends my own age... Even now I prefer to go to lunch and shopping with my mom to my own girlfriends. I really hope to have that kind of close relationship with my children.
post #113 of 135
Thread Starter 
Which aspects of your parents' parenting would you like to to replicate or avoid?

I loved how my mom parented me. She was very open and friend-like, but was still the parent. I knew so much more about "stuff" than all my friends. I was never scared when I started my period and knew about sex from a very young age. I taught all my friends about it, with real information. All my friends loved coming to my house because she was so great to hang out with and they could all talk to her more than their own parents. She was their little therapist half the time. I could talk to her about anything and everything, without judgment. I want to be like that.

My dad was great, too. He was more strict but would do these special little rituals with me that meant a lot. He would have a coursage delivered to school on my birthdays. He was always the one to take me special dress shopping for recitals, school dances, prom, etc. He had/has great taste in clothes (he's very much a metrosexual!!) and it became a special ritual for us. He would wake me up at 5am everyday before school to watch the news with him. Sometimes he would explain something I didn't understand and we would talk about news stories. I usually fell asleep leaning on his arm. It was our special alone time, like a secret from the rest of the family. We never talked about it outside of that time. It was our secret. He was also the one to wake us up for school every day, but he would do it in the sweetest way. He would sit on our beds and talk to us gently and sweetly, kiss our cheeks, tell us how happy he was to see us this morning, and then check back in every 5 minutes until we gently woke up by the time to get up. There was no throwing back the covers, turn on the lights and "get up!" stuff. I loved it! I still to this day set my alarm about an hour before I need to get up so I can wake up gently.

Dang! I love my parents! And that makes me think...this Sunday is the last Mother's Day I'll have that I won't be celebrated in some way.
post #114 of 135
Is anyone doing anything special this Mother's Day?
post #115 of 135
I'm making a special dinner for my adopted mom, whom I live with, on Saturday, then heading over to my own mother's house on Sunday to visit and love on her. Unfortunately hubby is still gone in Texas (coming back the 13th--yoohoo!!!) so I doubt he will be able to do anything special for me
post #116 of 135
It's a secret. I'm not a mom, so I'm planning some specialness for a friend who is. Maybe not ON mother's day, but around then.
post #117 of 135
I got the most fantastic Mother's Day surprise ever yesterday! My little blueberry was kicking and moving around lke crazy! Until then I wasn't sure if the little movements I felt were the baby or not because they seemed a little high. It was really cool!
post #118 of 135
I got the same Mother's Day surprise! We could feel kicks on the outside! I felt two and then my DH felt one! It was pretty awesome!
post #119 of 135
How exciting! I hope DH gets to feel the kicks soon too!
post #120 of 135
On the subject of Mother's Day... my MIL sent me a Mother's Day card "from the baby". My first Mother's Day card ever! Very cute I feel so... grown up.
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