1 year old and attachment... is this normal?

[Erdbeer]

My DD just turned a year old a few weeks ago. From the very beginning, she's been pretty fixated on me, but in the past 3 or 4 months it's been getting progressively more intense. I can't move out of a 2-foot radius of where she is before she starts to screech. That is, if I can manage to get her to sit alone at all... If I sit down with her on the floor to play, she will want to be on my lap. She will not let my husband hold her if I am in the room. If I am nearby, she will stiffen up, arch her back, and try to squirm towards me, or throw herself onto the floor and scream nonstop. I've tried everything to get past this... reassuring her, progressively moving away while keeping verbal contact, letting her cry... nothing works, and every day it seems a bit harder to get anything done. I am starting to really feel stifled. She also wants to nurse 4-6 times a night. I feel like I am starting to resent her.

My son was not like this... he was a lot more independent and easy-going.

Does anyone have any advice?

[Mamabeakley]

That sounds really hard to cope with for you.

Have you tried wearing her pretty much non-stop? I'm wondering if some reverse psychology (you can be right on Mama all the time until you just can't take it and WANT to get down) might help.

It sounds to me (I'm not an expert) like a possibly extreme case of separation anxiety - she's right at that age of learning to move away which can really freak some kids out.

[Erdbeer]

Yes, I've tried her in the sling... she used to love it but now she wants to get out after 5 minutes. She likes to be carried on my hip, but it's so hard to get anything done one-handed and my knee on the side I carry her on is starting to get wonky. Often if I take her out in the stroller for a walk, she wants to get out of the stroller and have me carry her. She just started crawling 2 weeks ago, so maybe you are right, and this has to do with it getting worse.

[Katie T]

I think as some kids get mobile they can become more clingy as they want to explore but the fact that they have to leave mama's loving arm's is a bit scary.

It is a tiring thing to go threw, but hopefully it will start getting better soon. If you can take it (trust me I know the feeling of never having empty arms) just keep following her lead and she will trust that you won't go far and is safe to explore away from mama.

[Erdbeer]

Thanks for reassuring me... my husband keeps telling me this is not normal and often I think he is right. As soon as I am out of sight she is fine. I'm really looking forward to this situation improving.

[spmamma]

DD was like that from birth. She simply needed me more than my friends babies needed their mamas. That being said, she seemed to start wanting a bit more independence by 18 MO and really started to blossom by age 2.

I'm sure that's not what you wanted to hear, but by honoring her need for a little extra security you are doing the right thing.