"sneaky" and "mischievous" behavior

[seemfrog]

DS (4 1/2) has always been very curious and into learning about his world and figuring out how things work. He needs a lot of stimulation to keep himself entertained and therefore has been getting into lots of "naughty" situations that captures his interest.

This happens frequently throughout the day when we are at home, usually when I am doing something else like cooking, or trying to do a little work on my computer. Same thing when DH is home.

His twin is the oposite, entertains himself very easily, gets out puzzles or games or plays pretend, or draws, etc to engage himself, and doesn't get into mischief.

So, I'll come home from work when DH has been at home with them to find my shampoo dumped out in the tub, the toothpaste tube squeezed out, pen mark in the sink, water dumped and re-dumped and spilled all over the carpet and left, crayon on the walls, puzzles pieces crammed into openings of the computer, etc etc I could go on and on.

To me this means he is bored and needs more stimulation, I'm trying to get him to think about this himself, so I say, "if you are bored, thing of something fun you'd like to do and try that, like a game, or dress up, or..." and get him to help me think of stuff. I've seen him do this ocassionally, but he gets bored with stuff pretty quick. I also see this as him wanted attention, so I try to make sure I (and DH) is spending good quality fun time throughout the day.

However, this still happens frequently, daily and I'm trying to figure out how to better deal with it. With the stuff that gets wasted, I've tried to explain how that is wasteful and how when he dumps all his bubble juice out to see it overflow the countainer, he then loses the oportunity to play with bubbles (for example).

The other piece to this is he is sneaking away, knows its "bad" and if we catch him in the act he jumps and says he isn't doing anything. Or if I ask him after the fact says "I didn't do it"

Any thoughts on this would be greatly appreciated!

[dkenagy]

I don't have a lot of advice for you, but I couldn't read and not respond; this post could have been about my (almost) 4 yo DD. She tells people, even strangers, that she's "sneaky"... even though I am doing my best to discourage her behavior, I am getting to the end of my rope on this issue... just over the past week, she took a brand-new eyeliner pencil and wrote all over my bathroom walls and cabinets, found some easter treats hidden and hid in my son's room to eat the entire package, took a blue crayon to her sister's favorite baby doll and wrote with a pen all over her own legs/feet/shoes/socks.

You aren't alone!! Hopefully someone will have some great advice for us!

[ssh]

Maybe he needs more permitted messy things he can do. My 4 year old DD can paint at the kitchen table, play in the bathroom sink or outside in a sand box. We've recently started letting her to stuff with glue and scissors (supervised though). It also sounds like he wants more attention.

[SeekingJoy]

DS has a tendency toward destruction if I don't watch him super closely. I think part of it is curiosity. Just how does that piece of electronic equipment work? How hard can I pull on that door knob before it will pop off? And part of it is boredom.

Things are still a work in progress here, but two things seem to help.

1) I gave him more appropriate options. Building toys (legos, knex, tinkertoys, etc), real tools to use outside, and things he could take apart with my full permission. Messy activities with paint, food coloring, sand and beading also helped.

2) I limited his access to trouble. Most of the time, this means I send him outside where I care a whole lot less about the sand being hauled around the yard while he builds levers than I do my canned goods being flung across the room with levers, or whatever he is exploring that day.

[BellinghamCrunchie]

DD is very similar. If its quiet, I had better go check on her.

Shampoo, toothpaste, bubbles... we've had issues with those, too.

Your DS sounds very sensory, in addition to having an active and curious mind. It will help if you can provide sensory activities a couple times a day to meet those needs.

At DiscountSchoolSupply.com we got foam paints, and tiny bottles of paint that squish out like toothpaste does, but are small enough that its expected that the child will squeeze the whole thing out in one sitting. Fingerpainting (which inevitably turns into body painting then a bath) is popular still, even though she is 5.

Foam soap is a favorite of DD's, as well. Once the foam soap container is empty, you can make more by adding water with a bit of dish soap; it foams just as well.

I buy shampoo for $1.00 a bottle at the dollar store, 4 at a time. I keep my own shampoo up high. If the cheap shampoo does get wasted, I remind myself that it was cheaper than a can of silly string and provided more fun.

Homemade playdoh is softer and more fun to play with than regular playdoh. DD particularly likes to to squish her foot into it.

Spray bottles with water and food coloring are "paint" and she'll go outside and "paint" the trees and rocks and stuff. And the window. And my car. Oh well, it washes off in the rain.

We buy bubbles in big containers and pour small amounts into a small container. She'll eventually dump it, and that's okay, cause it wasn't much.

Most stuff I don't want her to get into is still kept out of reach.

[NellieKatz]

A roasting pan full of flour or full of uncooked rice...those were our LIFESAVERS with our little guy, who I suspect has "sensory issues" (whatever that really means....but he always loves to push, punch, squeeze, sift, dig, kick, bite....you name it). He would sit there with his Matchbox-sized constructions vehicles (Siku is a great brand of these) for the LONGEST time, digging in it, playing, chattering, sifting it, squeezing it....it was the greatest. I'd let him do it at the kitchen table. For a while the flour DID get to be too messy and hard to clean up when it left the pan, but for the most part the mess was SO worth it!