Reasons why co-sleeping is good...

[Channelle]

We have been co-sleeping with our 3 month old since day one. We both discussed this when she was newborn that neither one of us felt comfortable with her being in her bed in her room all alone, so it wasn't an issue for us. Fast forward to the last couple weeks or so, and I guess he told some ladies at work (we work together) and they are all telling him what a horrible idea that is and how we'll never get her out of our bed, etc. He also told his mom, and while she was in town last week, she gave me SO MUCH grief about her sleeping with us, lots of snarky comments about how her crib is just a toy box for stuffed animals since it's not being used and why did we even have a crib? (Two reasons, I wanted to make a cute nursery, and the crib was free!) And how we are going to spoil her, etc. (This is the same lady who coslept with DH until he was like 8! I don't get it!)

Anyway, now DH is second guessing everything and asking when we are going to move her to her crib and saying we don't want to make her spoiled or have her control us, etc! I just keep telling him, that I want her by me, and we'll discuss it again when I feel she's ready (maybe when she can turn over, sit up, crawl a bit...), and tell anyone who talks to him about it that it's not up for discussion and to shove it.

Can you give me any good reasons to give to him on why co-sleeping (sp. Bedsharing) is a good thing? (No breastfeeding advantages though, she has refused to latch from day one so those to work on him to persuade him) He's usually so open minded about crunchy parenting-he likes to wear her, bought me a pump to at least give her my milk, agrees about no circ and no vax...

[odoole]

I've never understood why so many people seem to confuse bonding with spoiling, as if love and affection and trust and stability are "treats" that we should only give to our children sparingly.

I understand the need to set boundaries eventually, but so much of what you're saying in your post just doesn't apply to an infant, and I don't think there is any credence to the "you'll never get her out of your bed" claim.

[Katie T]

Me and my 5 other siblings all shared a bed with my parents and we don't still sleep with them. I used to get those lines all the time when my first was a baby/toddler/preschooler from people and it drove me crazy!

My Dd1 is in her own bed in her own room now and has been for a couple years, so it will happen when your DD is ready.

As for why it is good, It reduced the chance of sids (as you follow the safe bedsharing "rules") It makes for a very well adjusted, secure, loved child.

Cribs are a "modern" thing they used to all sleep together and every one turned out great.

It is not bedsharing that will create a spoiled, controlling child, it is how the child is raised.

Dr. Sears is a well respected pediatrician who is for cosleeping and has lots of great info on his site. Just google him.

Good luck it sucks when every one has a opinion on YOUR child.