Help with the princess phase please!

[Pumpkin_Pie]

DS just turned 3 and is absolutely OBSESSED with everything "pretty" and "princess". He has been wearing a Disney Ariel mermaid nightgown obsessively for three days now. It is currently in the dryer because I snuck it into the wash last night and he won't go to school without it (at least not without being heartbroken).

I don't do any Disney AT ALL, or at least I didn't up until now.... Any ideas on anything else that he could wear for "princess" without being Disney? I HATE that dress. I bought it in a moment of weakness at a thrift store when he fell in love with it. I figured it would stay home and he could use it for dress up. Now strangers are coming up to him saying, "Who is that one your dress?" When he answers "A princess!" they try to correct him by saying "No, no, that is Ariel!" When he says, "No, it is a princess, they start to argue with him". It is driving me BATTY.....

Help!

[OTMomma]

So are you looking for princess type clothes without the disney theme? If so, a number of the natural type websites sell some beautiful silk playclothes- threesisterstoys.com has some nice stuff. You may also be able to find some on etsy, or I got my dd a used flowergirl dress cheap off e-bay years ago that she loved to play princess in.

Really, if you want to replace it, you probably should try to figure out exactly what about it your son likes most- colors, texture, style, or that it has a girl on it.

Peace,

[Lolafanana]

We have been through that stage as well and honestly, I would say don't fight it. You don't have to encourage it but also don't fight it. I tried fighting it with my daughter and it only made her want it more. So, we finally embraced the princess phase and now at 4, she is pretty much over it. I mean, she still likes it but has moved on to horses, which is such a welcome!

I do have a friend who also HATES Disney (I don't like Disney but wouldn't say HATE). Her daughter started getting into the princess thing. What she would do is simply explain why she doesn't like Disney and princesses but that her daughter could make her own decisions. While her daughter doesn't own anything Disney, her mom does buy her more medieval princess stuff (we tried that but my dd wouldn't go for it) and it somewhat appeases her. The only thing I would worry about telling her that she doesn't approve of princess stuff is that the child would feel that mom doesn't like what I like and then internalize that they are doing something wrong and then ultimately, that here is something wrong with the child. But that may be me projecting.

You could also just talk about the difference between real princesses and Disney princesses

Good luck !

[One_Girl]

My dd has several poofy dresses that she considers nice enough for a princess to wear. The thrift store tends to pull out their really nice dresses around the holidays so this may be a good time to get a spring colored one. If he doesn't know who the Disney princesses are then I think you should just let it go and let him believe what he wants about this dress without introducing the subject. I usually put on a rushed expression, tell the person that my dd chose a better name, and/or tell my dd to say good bye to someone (in a nice way) when I am annoyed by a complete stranger correcting her. That may help to cut down on the arguments. I remember them as very annoying also before we started watching the disney movies. I wanted to get through the store without my dd having to get furious at someone for telling her that the fairy on her dress did not go by the name she had chosen.

[Cascadian]

I believe that this same post regularly comes up once a month. Do a little google search in this section...lots of really great ideas and debate in the past.

[nextcommercial]

He probably likes it's sparkly prettiness. Not just the Disneyness.

They are obnoxiously attractive.... even I stop and say "ooooh" when I see the front of the Disney store.

I think that particular dress could get "ruined" in the washer. Or "lost".... and try to find or make something else all shiny and sparkly.

[claras_mom]

Originally Posted by nextcommercial

He probably likes it's sparkly prettiness. Not just the Disneyness.

:

I'm helping dd1's preK class with a big art project--quilted wall hanging. When I brought in examples for them to see, the one every single kid loved, boys and girls alike, was the one with the sparkly beads and the flowers.

[eclipse]

My dd (coming up on 7 yo) has always been into the princess thing. She has some Disney stuff (and has seen some of the movies) but they honestly aren't her favorite dresses. We have lots of other dresses picked up at thrift stores that are prettier and sparklier than the Disney stuff, and she prefers them. My four year old DS likes to dress up in the dresses too, for mostly the same reasons. One thing I did do to combat the Disney idea of a Princess was to buy some feminist fairy tale books. My kids' favorite princess stories are The Pincess Knight, Sleeping Ugly, The Paper Bag Princess, Cinder Edna, and Princess Smarty Pants.

[Pumpkin_Pie]

Originally Posted by eclipse

My dd (coming up on 7 yo) has always been into the princess thing. She has some Disney stuff (and has seen some of the movies) but they honestly aren't her favorite dresses. We have lots of other dresses picked up at thrift stores that are prettier and sparklier than the Disney stuff, and she prefers them. My four year old DS likes to dress up in the dresses too, for mostly the same reasons. One thing I did do to combat the Disney idea of a Princess was to buy some feminist fairy tale books. My kids' favorite princess stories are The Pincess Knight, Sleeping Ugly, The Paper Bag Princess, Cinder Edna, and Princess Smarty Pants.

Thanks for the book suggestions! He is dying for a princess story, but I haven't wanted to even start looking for any, for fear of finding the typical "poor weak beautiful woman is saved by the brave handsome strong man" storyline.

I will also keep an eye out at thrift stores. This particular one has a very large picture of Ariel on the front of it, so I am pretty sure that it is the picture that he is in love with, unfortunately. When I dropped him off at preschool today wearing it, I encouraged the teachers to let him paint in it, or use markers, or whatever without a smock. He has ruined so many clothes there, I thought that was a good way to make it "disappear", but the one teacher that didn't get my message took it off when they did painting today. *sigh*

I also might try making him something. We have tons of playsilks that haven't come out for play in a really long time. Maybe I could make a belt of somesort and tuck his silks in for a princess skirt or make a princessy cape.

Just hoping this isn't a super long phase, although I am enjoying reactions I get out in public just a tiny bit when they ask "her" name and "she" says "I'm Griffin!"

[eclipse]

Originally Posted by Pumpkin_Pie

Just hoping this isn't a super long phase, although I am enjoying reactions I get out in public just a tiny bit when they ask "her" name and "she" says "I'm Griffin!"

Everyone thinks my ds is a girl, too (might be the butt long hair ) and saying his name does nothing to clarify, since Aidan is an increasingly popular name for girls, and is also often heard by people as Ada or Ava . Good thing he doesn't care, right?

[dianna11]

DD has recently dove into the Princess Thing, and it was fairly intolerable, until we saw The Princess and the Frog. Get this, it's a Disney movie... with no evil women, and the heroine actually has real goals (to open a restaurant) and makes her own dreams come true! It's all about how rewards come from hard work and short cuts don't pay off. Finding a mate is nice, but not as important as your own goals.

The prince is cool too... he doesn't even care much about palace life, because they didn't teach him how to do anything for himself (so, that puts the mystique and longing to live in a palace in perspective for little ones).

I still can't believe it's a Disney Princess movie.

So good!

So, at least if your DS has to be all about princesses, this is one with a much better message than Ariel

[MusicianDad]

If it drives you batty, tell them to stop correcting your son. It's his dress, not theirs.