Is anyone else experiencing PRE partum depression?

[grainger]

I am 22 weeks pregnant with # 5 and have had a really tough pregnancy. For starters, the pregnancy was a bit of a surprise (I am 42) and came immediately after a terrible bout with the flu that landed me in the hospital for nearly 2 weeks. My first trimester was sheer hell (nonstop nausea and fatigue) which was also a surprise since I was never sick like that in any of my other pregnancies. I have several major life stressors at the moment, including a hella stressful job (a good job but tremendously stressful) and an 18 year old child struggling with some major problems. Last but not least, in the five years leading up to this pregnancy, I experienced multiple first trimester miscarriages, which have made it very hard for me to bond with my pregnancy/baby and to believe I am really going to leave the hospital with a healthy newborn.

Despite all these stressful things, I have a great husband and family, lots of good friends and excellent health overall. Generally speaking, life is good. Yet for the past four months I have felt a creeping depression coming over me. I have never experienced real depression in my life except as situationally appropriate (death in the family, etc). Depression does run in my family, so this had me feeling very nervous. I finally spoke to my wonderful OB about it at my visit this week because it was getting pretty bad - interfering with my ability to mother my other kids and do my job. He was great and helped me realize just how anxious I am about the outcome of this pregnancy. It doesn't help that I have an anterior placenta and am having trouble feeling any fetal movement at all. Anyway, as of five days ago, I am taking Zoloft. I am very hopeful that I will begin to feel some relief from the medication soon but so far, I actually think I feel MORE depressed. Today I am having to work from home because I just couldn't deal with being in the office, yet I am still getting far too little accomplished. This depression is definitely putting me behind at work and that just stresses me out even more.

I am hoping to hear from some other mamas who maybe went through a pre-partum depression like this and managed to kick it before the baby was born. Did you take medication? If so, how long did it take to start working? I wake up every day hoping that the Zoloft will kick in that day but instead I feel even worse.

Thanks to anyone who cares to share her own story with me. I am really struggling and this isn't like me at all.

[Amanda_Reyasmom]

I have suffered from depression in the past, at my 9 week appt, I broke down in my pcp's office and told her everything. She asked what had worked in the past and I'm back on wellbutrin and it's been a life saver for me. (Probably more literal than I'd like to admit) It took a full 2 weeks before I started feeling relief, and probably 3 before I really felt like I could function. In the past when I've started the same drug it only took about a week for it to kick in. I'm still stressed out, but at least now I can get out of bed and don't break down into tears 8 times a day.

I hope you get some relief soon.

[jdejong]

I'm so sorry to hear that you're dealing with this. I have no direct experience, but a dear friend just had her first baby a month ago, and really struggled with pre-partum depression. She started taking medication when she was about four months in, and it did help quite a bit - she's still on it, with no immediate plans to stop. I can't say how long it took her before the effects of the drug were apparent, but she was in much, much better shape after she started getting treatment. Good for you that you've seen your doctor, hopefully treatment now will stave off more problems after birth. Best of luck!

[norasmommy]

I also experienced pre-partum depression during all of my pregnancies. I have also had 2 pregnancy losses, so pregnancy after that has not be so easy for me with all the worries, etc. I do have a healthy 3 yo DD and another on the way but I have found with all of my pregnancies, I have felt very down/depressed, especially for about the 1st 4-5 months. I found that with time I felt better, and I tried my best just to make it through each day and of course be the best mom that I could despite my depressed feelings.

I find it interesting that not many people or books discuss pregnancy related depression, although obviously it affects many women. I wish you all the best and go easy on yourself, it is okay at times like this just to "maintain" as they say. Maybe treat yourself to something nice like a massage or even talk to a counselor/therapist about what you're experiencing, it may help.

Best wishes for your and your baby!

[october]

Right at 22 weeks I began getting some pretty intense anxiety from morning sickness coupled with severe insomnia. Sleeping every other night took me over the edge and right into the abyss of depression. I felt insane.

I ended up getting on Citalopram, which is generic Celexa. It focuses on anxiety in depression, and it started to really work for me after about a week. Thankfully, I only needed it for 8 weeks and weaned off of it without any problems, within 6 days. So baby has been weaned off of it now for a couple months (still pregnant and due today). I hear that Zoloft is one of the safest to continue using while breastfeeding though, so if you have to stay on it throughout the pregnancy it shouldn't be that big of a deal.

All I really wanted to say to you though, is you are doing the right thing and don't let any guilt creep in. Our babies receive the neurotransmitters that we are firing, and if they are of depression, baby is receiving that and not thriving. Even if we have to use synthetic neurotransmitters, it is definitely for the well being of both of you. Good for you for getting help and you have a very lucky baby.

[Surfacing]

Hugs to those who are struggling. I have struggled with depression, panic and anxiety throughout my life.

During my pregnancy with dd1 and after I experienced terrible problems but was too ashamed to get allopathic help. I did attend a PPD counselling group though which was great.

Then I got better for awhile and we conceived dd2. During that pregnancy I plunged down again. For the health of my family, as well as my self, I reached out and decided to try meds again -- I was desperate. They were literally a lifesaver for me. I got on Prozac during the 2nd tri of my pregnancy with dd2 and am still on it. We added Wellbutrin as well in the postpartum. Dd1 was born just great while I was on Prozac.

It took me usually a week or two to feel the effects of the meds evened out a little bit. Usually by a month it was doing it's thing. I think it's only wise, responsible and loving to ourselves to take care of ourselves. I hope you are feeling better soon OP.

[Plummeting]

I was fortunate not to experience it in this pregnancy, but with DD1 I developed the typical symptoms of PPD/OCD while I was still pregnant. I did not take medication (I had been on Zoloft when I got pregnant, but it was not my first try on an SSRI and I quit taking it. I don't tolerate them well at all. They actually CAUSE anxiety for me) and continued to have PPD/OCD after DD's birth. I did eventually tell my therapist about it - I had started seeing one while still pregnant, in order to have one at the ready - and I was able to deal with it that way.

It does take a few weeks to feel the effects of SSRI drugs, so don't lose hope if you still feel bad for a while. However, if after several weeks you haven't noticed any improvement or your symptoms seem worse, I would look for a therapist instead. Some people react to SSRI's with anxiety.

[JennTheMomma]

I had prenatal depression with my first. After he was born it stayed and I had PPD for a little over a year. I'm 37 weeks now and haven't had any depression.

[sarahdavida]

Originally Posted by october

Our babies receive the neurotransmitters that we are firing, and if they are of depression, baby is receiving that and not thriving. Even if we have to use synthetic neurotransmitters, it is definitely for the well being of both of you.

I absolutely agree with getting help for this and truly hope that you can find some relief ...

but I must say, I had a very difficult pregnancy and was very down and depressed a lot of the time - I have a tendency to get that way easily - and while I wouldn´t classify it as clinical depression, it was very unpleasant I felt very lonely, ill, helpless, confused, insecure, etc. for a variety of reasons...

My son, who is now 3, since day one, has been and is one of the most positive, happy human beings I have ever encountered - it takes a LOT for him to get down about anything - his interest and enthusiasm for anything and anyone is truly unbelievable and very contagious...i would have hated to think that my dark and depressive feelings throughout my pregnancy would have had a negative affect on him - that he would not have been thriving, physically and/or mentally (he was also born very healthy, thankfully).

I am not a professional expert on the matter, but I just had to share my experience and view here. I had a difficult and very unhappy pregnancy, but gave birth to a very healthy and extremely happy boy.