Schedule help

[crunchy_mommy]

DS has never had anything even remotely resembling a schedule. A typical two-day span (he's 14mos btw):

Day 1:
wake at 9am
nap 11:30-1pm
nap 4-5:30pm
nap 8-9pm
bed 11:30pm

Day 2:
wake at 11am
nap 2-5pm
bed 11pm

I think some days he wakes up too early & tries to "catch up" throughout the day. My main issues with the lack of schedule are
1) I have to work minimum 20 hours/week, and I go through the week terrified he'll wake up too early in the morning or he'll fall asleep in the car & I won't be able to use his nap time to work.
2) He goes to bed sooo late & DH and I are too exhausted by that point. He's still waking up frequently at night so I try to get DH to stay up with him since I do the night wakings but DH falls asleep on me & I end up staying up.
3) A little consistency/predictability would be so nice for my sanity!!

The schedule I'd like to get him on is (obviously flexible):

wake 10:30am
nap 2-5pm
bed 10:30pm

But I have no clue how to get him on that schedule!! He only nurses to sleep & he'll only nap on me or in the car. He nurses a thousand times a day. Plus there are some days we want/need to get out of the house by 9:30/10 and how do we manage that if he's sleeping 'til 10:30? I'm just not sure how to proceed. I don't want him to wake earlier because he's happier when he sleeps in & I'm not a morning person, plus I can fit a lot of my work hours in then.

[mormontreehugger]

Have you read the No Cry Sleep Solution? I'm struggling a bit with a schedule myself, and I need to reread it. It has some good advice, even if you're not looking to nightwean.
One thing it does say is that the natural rhythm of a baby's sleep may not be too convenient for you--as in, he may need to go to bed at 7 or 8 because it's just nature putting him to bed...
I would recommend a couple days where you're not pressured for work that you can set aside to really focus on getting the schedule into place and figuring out some routines to gradually replace nursing to sleep (maybe get a lovey?)

Disclaimer: I'm still on my first kid, and we're having sleep issues too

[llwr]

The easiest way I've found to help get a good routine going is to wake dc at the same time every morning. Now I know no one wants to wake a sleeping baby, but it's easier to wake them up than to make them sleep, and then when they're tired x hours later, the nap will end up around the same time every day. If the nap ends too early, I'll usually try to keep things quiet and restful until the time that a good nap would end. Then the 2nd nap (if he still takes one) isn't thrown off as much. An early bedtime is a good way to catch up when the day just didn't go as planned. And generally, kids are much earlier to rise, earlier to bed, but if late works for you keep it.

[crunchy_mommy]

Yeah he's opposite what I would think (early bed times etc.) and really seems to be happier & sleep better with a late bedtime. Just hoping we can push it up A LITTLE earlier so I'm not getting only 6 (interrupted) hours of sleep!! I woke him up at 10 today because we had to go somewhere so I'll see how that works, maybe I can try that for a few days. I have read some of the NCSS methods but they don't seem to work well for us, but waking him up early might help!!

[Hannah'sMommy]

Our 7.5 month DD has been on a pretty good schedule since she was about 3-4 months old (thanks to having to work full time and a babysitter that is great with getting babies to nap). Our schedule looks like this:

Wake 6:30-7am ish
nap 9-9:30 ish
nap 1-3:30
Bed 7ish

I do have to wake her up in the morning about half the time, the other half she wakes on her own. And honestly, what helped a lot was getting her to fall asleep without nursing. I still nurse 2-3 times at night, but now she doesn't need to nurse in order to nap or go to bed. This is great because DH can help get her to bed so I get a break.

What if you didn't let him nap later than 5:00pm if you want him in bed by 10:30pm? That way he has a good stretch where he's awake before bed. I know, it's hard to keep a cranky and tired baby up, it takes some work to keep them busy in the evenings. Also, if you wake him up consistently at the same time, he'll probably get used to waking up at that time.

Oh, and doing a consistent bedtime routine (starting around the same time every night) helped. We do bath, book(s), bed. This helps her know the difference between a nap and bedtime.

Good luck!