Question about doulas

[kitkatkaddoodle]

I'm not sure if this is supposed to be in this forum, the birth forum, or the birth professionals one, so if it needs to be moved, sorry about that!

Anyway, I am considering using a doula for this, my second birth, but I was wondering what happens if the doula is unable to attend the birth due to it being very quick or something. Do you get some of your money back? I do expect that they'd get to keep some of the prepaid amount since they are on call and meet with you before and after, but how is it handled if your birth doula doesn't actually get to come to the birth center/your home for the birth?

What other contingency things should I consider? I didn't get that far with the questions with the first doula I talked to, the one who is teaching my natural birth class. While she is very knowledgeable and obviously knows her stuff as she's been doing this for decades, I find her a little ... pushy? Forceful? I don't know, but it was a little off-putting.

However, another woman in the class recommended the doula she is planning to use, and we discussed why SHE didn't pick the class instructor; seems she feels the same way as me! If this new lady is a good fit, I just want to make sure I have all the right questions to ask.

Thanks!

[evjolin]

i think you have a few options....i found a group of doulas (not sure how common that is) so i am virtually guaranteed a doula for my birth--we meet with all 3 of them once a month, so i know all 3. the one who lives closest will attend the birth, pending any external circumstances that prevent her from being there.

as far as questions go, ask about if they have a back up doulas, if you will be able to meet with that back up. ask how many clients the doula take per month, as that will increase/decrease your chances of her missing the birth. i can't remember what other questions i asked, because for me it was much more about finding someone who felt like a friend and who both my dh and i were comfortable with than anything else. call a few, talk on the phone first, and then maybe meet with a few.

i spoke with several but these doulas were our first meeting and we knew right away they were the ones :-) good luck!

[organicpapayamama]

what happens if the doula is unable to attend the birth due to it being very quick or something. Do you get some of your money back? I do expect that they'd get to keep some of the prepaid amount since they are on call and meet with you before and after, but how is it handled if your birth doula doesn't actually get to come to the birth center/your home for the birth?

each doula has her own way of handling fees and preparing for the unexpected like missing the birth because its fast or because of some unforeseen occurrence. These are the questions you will want to ask when interviewing doulas.

I personally have it all disclosed on my website and contract and even provide a backup doula just in case. But each doula is different.

some other question you may want to ask are:

-how many births have you attended?
-how long have you been a doula?
-how did you become interested in being a doula?
-what is your philosophy on birth?
-where did she certify through?
-dose she have children? (for me its important that my doula know personally what I went through)
-ask about prenatal visits... does she do them? how many? what will be covered?
-of course the money question you asked above
-any postpartum visits?
-any breastfeeding support?
-will she come to your home? hospital?
-where has she supported? (birth center, hospital, home birth, water birth, c-sec)
-has she supported at your birth location? does she know your dr/hospital staff if she has?

those are just a few questions I can think of

[neonalee]

We had our first meeting with a doula recently (the one we will most likely go with in fact). She has a backup in case something happens with her (unlikely but possible) and she's happy to bring her to one of the 2 prenatal visits she provides. I didn't think to ask about what would happen if I gave birth that quickly. I don't really anticipate that happening, and for us it's mostly about having someone there in case DP ends up being out of town (also unlikely).

I didn't really go in with a list of questions. We just met at a local coffee place and sat and talked. But pretty much everything in the list above was covered. As was mentioned, it was more about seeing how we got along, how our personalities meshed then anything else. The rest is important too though. I wouldn't have wanted a pushy/forceful doula either, best of luck!

[rootzdawta]

Moved from I'm Pregnant.

[womenswisdom]

I do not offer a refund if I miss the birth for a reason beyond my control. If you have a super-fast birth, I am still not able to take another client for the time period for which you were booked so I would lose out on a significant amount of income. I don't charge more if you have a 3-day birth and don't refund if you have a precipitous labor either. Just my policy, which I detail in my contract.

[sanguine_speed]

My doulas have never offered refunds for missed births unless the births were missed due to their own issues (they didn't answer the phone, they couldn't come...).

I have no problem with this policy because it is very much like an insurance policy, IMO. You may end up needing her for several days, or you may birth without her. For a doula, I imagine it balances out in the end.

[SalmonBayDoula]

My contract states that if my reason for missing your birth is my fault, you get a full refund. If it is due to a precipitous labor, your failure to call me at all, etc, than full fee is due. I state in my contract, I need up to 90 minutes to get to you. Reality is, it is *very rare* to get a "the baby is coming now" call that did not have some heads up along the way.

I have attended more than 170 births and missed two...one woman went from 1 cm to baby out in 30 minutes, called me at 1 cm and the other called me and asked me to come , said labor was starting, and had a baby 45 minutes later. Those are the very rare situations.

I used to offer postpartum hours in addition to the two postpartum visits I normally do, but I no longer do that.

It is pretty unlikely that your labor will go so fast that your support team will not make it.

Good luck with your VBAC!
Sharon

[MegBoz]

Well, I recall my doula's contract saying that she couldn't refund your money for a fast birth, just like if your labor dragged on, she wouldn't demand more money for spending many hours with you. I thought that seemed fair.

Actually, she did NOT make it to my house for any of my labor - I felt the urge to push when she was still 10 min away. (not her fault at all, I was on the phone with her, but things just moved fast - especially as a 1st timer!) But still, it was useful having her around for the journey to the hospital & the pushing stage & for about an hour or so afterwards. Certainly, if she didn't make it for the birth, I'd consider asking her to come some other time to help & make up for it. (either right then, immediately after birth, or next day if you chose.)

[thefreckledmama]

I wouldn't expect any kind of refund unless the doula was absent through her own fault. I totally agree that a fast labor that she may miss (or almost miss) shouldn't be refunded, in the same way she wouldn't charge labor ended up lasting longer than usual.

[kitkatkaddoodle]

That's what I was thinking. I'm almost of a mind just to ditch the whole idea of a doula altogether now, actually. I know each labor is different, but while I liked the one I had my first delivery (I never asked her about refunds or such), I also didn't much feel her presence was all that necessary. My husband calls the hire "insurance," but at $500, I am not sure I have the funds or the incentive to go for it.

Thanks for the help!