Nap challenges

[kgreenemama]

My DS will turn two in exactly two weeks, and for the past three days, he has not taken a nap at home. He spends 2 days with grandma and 3 at a day care each week, and goes down within 10 minutes for them - no problems most days. (He's never napped well and has yet to STTN - I had to hold him for the first 14 months through two naps per day. We bed share.) After he switched to one nap per day, I could lie next to him. Naps have always been short at home, also. At day care and at grandma's he'll go 90 min to 2 hours. I do the SAME thing that they do for the sleep routine, except he gets nummies at home. He sleeps from 8-8:30 at night to about 6 am. He used to go to be earlier, but lately it's been taking 90 minutes to get him to sleep. All of his teeth have been in for months.

I'm far more frustrated than I'm letting on here. Feeling like I'm doing things wrong or he's been put on this planet to torment me. I'm SICK SICK SICK of hearing about friends' kids who have slept easily from the start and at age 4 are still taking THREE HOUR NAPS, during which time mom gets to clean/cook/read/do hobbies/catch up with friends/exercise/spend time with DH. I either do none of those things or I have to do them when DS is awake, during which time, he becomes a holy terror b/c I'm not giving him my full attention.

I'm beginning to hate being a mom. Writing that makes me want to cry, but I'm so. very. tired. and frustrated. Any advice?

[kgreenemama]

Perhaps I'll try the Family Bed forum.

[marispel]

Where does he sleep at grandma's and daycare?

My first thought is he is probably excited to have you near him and so he isn't winding down well. Any chance you can let him lay down in his own bed - maybe change up the routine at home?

[kgreenemama]

That's a great suggestion, and I've wondered this myself. Honestly, it's me who's afraid to try. Too attached. I know, I know, I need to get over that and let him stretch his limits. Old habits die hard for me. THANKS for the advice.

[Mrs-Mama]

I agree with pp...change up the routine a bit. I use to snuggle my DS to sleep, but it started taking longer and longer until it just didn't work anymore. It took some time adjusting to the new routine, but he slept so much better (and fell asleep quicker) when he started falling asleep on his own. I recommend reading Sleepless in America and The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Pre-schoolers. Good luck! Napping issues are so frustrating

[LindsG]

Mama, i don't have any advice but if it makes you feel better you are so not alone. I could have literally written pretty much your entire post...cept my DS is only 15 months...but at the rate we are going, i can guarantee we'll still be there at 2 years. I, too, feel so envious that other moms get that break. I, too, get nothing done because DS tugs at my legs all day if i'm not giving him attention. I, too, am too scared and attached to try letting him nap away from me! And I, too, hate being a mom some days. I sure hope we both find answers somewhere because I sure understand your misery. Hang in there!