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Still breastfeeding...planning to tandem?

post #1 of 35
Thread Starter 
So despite thinking my 15 mo DS would be weaning this spring, we're actually nursing a bit more than before (dry nursing, I think?). He only wants to nurse for about 5 minutes or less, and it's usually only before bed at night, and sometimes in the morning or before naps on the weekends when we're home together.

We've been supplementing with formula since I went back to work in August and couldn't pump enough, and he eats TONS of solids (more than any toddler I've ever met). So I think this is more about ritual than nutrients. So along those lines, I got the book "Adventures in Tandem Nursing" and read it, and I kind of think I'm going to be open to this. I'll follow his lead, and see how simultaneous nursing works out for us, but that's what I'm thinking. Especially if it's a connection/seek the source/re-centering/soothing thing, I wouldn't want to deny him that given the major upheaval coming (and given that I can't explain any of it ahead of time...he has no idea what's coming).

Who else is here? What are your plans? Thoughts? I'm HOPING my crazy nipple tenderness goes away with newbaby comes, though...jeez!
post #2 of 35
Yes, I'm planning on tandem nursing here too. DD just turned 2 and still nurses 3+ times a day. I feel kind of bad that there is no milk for her, though I am happy that she is getting a second serving of colostrum!

My nipples have been really painful when she first latches on, but that feeling goes away in the first 20-30 seconds. I've been wondering if she will help bring the milk in much more quickly once the baby is born and if I should reduce her nursing sessions the first few days once the babe is her so that the babe gets all the colostrum she needs?

I hope all goes well with tandem nursing and that I don't end up finding it really frustrating or something.

I'd love to hear any insight you've read in the book you are reading. Maybe I should see if our library has it or wants to buy it.
post #3 of 35
Emilash, and anyone else who is nursing while pregnant, is anyone experiencing contractions due to the breastfeeding?
post #4 of 35
I'm not going to tandem, but I've been told that colostrum can cause diarrhea in older nurslings. Don't know if it's true or not, just passing it along! I guess it makes sense since it's partially designed to help move the meconium out.
post #5 of 35
I am still nursing my 3 yo. We have cut down a lot but she still needs it. I thought she would wean but now I think she will still be nursing once the baby gets here. I know there are times when I have no milk. She tells me. And my nipples are sooooooo painful at times that I have to ask her to stop. She usually understands but sometimes it is very hard for her to stop. I want to read that book. I really didn't want to tandem but I feel like you that it is going to be such a huge change that we may be grateful for that connection. I am just going with the flow......
post #6 of 35
I'm with you mamas here. I was planning to wean dd2 completely and we have nightweaned, but she still definitely wants to nurse during the day (comfort, connection) and once before she goes to sleep at night in bed.

I wasn't planning on tandem nursing but I can't really see just cutting it off cold turkey, it doesn't seem right, she loves it sooooooo much, I can't do that to her.

Like others, I feel very sensitive and in pain when she first latches on, but then that goes away. I remember nursing my first two newborns and it was always painful at first for me. Not sure why it's so but it is.

I'm kind of looking forward to having dd2 around to help with plugged ducts or full breasts instead of having to pump.

I have a bit of colostrum now that comes. I can hear her swallowing at times. But she doesn't stay on much after that, I don't think she likes the flavour of it. That's okay.

I don't have the time, money or energy to read Adventures in Tandem Nursing right now. Would you pleeease care to share any bits from it? TIA
post #7 of 35
Thread Starter 
I haven't experienced contractions when nursing (more so than the usualy Braxton Hicks I get a lot).

As for the book, Adventures in Tandem Nursing, I did skim though all of it (had to buy it, my library doesn't have it), but I found it kind of disorganized. What I got out of it was a lot of anecdotes from people tandeming, the clarification that both simultaneously nursing two and not-simultaneously nursing but still nursing two are both considered tandem nursing. There were pics with some ways to position two babes, some nutrition info, some info about who to feed first (which basically gave a variety of options not saying one was better than the other) and I can't really remember the rest. There were a lot of reference pages with long works cited lists.

Overall, it just made me feel better about my choice. My little guy is only 15 months, and our midwife/FNP just told us at his last check-up that it's time to say goodbye to the bottle (we supplement with formula- but he should be taking it from a cup and she said once we get that transition down we should switch him to cows milk), but she was very supportive of the tandem idea. That was good, too.
post #8 of 35
I'm planning on tandem nursing if DS (almost 25 months) doesn't wean himself before then. I doubt he will... he's been dry nursing for the last few months and I just squeezed today and got some colostrum out. Like someone else mentioned, it does hurt quite a bit for the first 30 seconds or so, but it goes away... most of the time. If it doesn't go away I know it's because he's so lazy with his latch at times and he wiggles SO much! We only nurse before naptime and before bed, but sometimes he is still so restless and just won't hold still.

Someone asked if anybody that's nursing and pregnant has had any ctx.... I have had some BH. I might've had them before last week but I never noticed them... but then last week I was fighting off a potential kidney infection and was having some pain, plus that day I was really active and I think the combination of those two things, along with the fact that I was nursing when I felt them... was what made them VERY noticeable. I took a bath and they went away. Ever since then, I can feel them when I'm nursing. Not nearly as uncomfortable as last week, though. I never felt them with DS.
post #9 of 35
I'm tandeming for now, hope the big one will hang on until there's real milk again!

Something neat that happened: A few weeks ago, DS was sick. He gets febrile seizures so I have to keep an eye on him. With all of the worry for him, my milk came back! Literally, I could hear him swallowing, his diapers got more "nursing-baby", and I could even squirt a bit out! Unfortunately, it didn't stick, but I was so grateful while it lasted that I could help him feel better.
post #10 of 35
Quote:
Originally Posted by nudnik View Post
I'm tandeming for now, hope the big one will hang on until there's real milk again!

Something neat that happened: A few weeks ago, DS was sick. He gets febrile seizures so I have to keep an eye on him. With all of the worry for him, my milk came back! Literally, I could hear him swallowing, his diapers got more "nursing-baby", and I could even squirt a bit out! Unfortunately, it didn't stick, but I was so grateful while it lasted that I could help him feel better.
Just proves how amazing our bodies are!
post #11 of 35
Quote:
Originally Posted by nudnik View Post
Something neat that happened: A few weeks ago, DS was sick. He gets febrile seizures so I have to keep an eye on him. With all of the worry for him, my milk came back! Literally, I could hear him swallowing, his diapers got more "nursing-baby", and I could even squirt a bit out! Unfortunately, it didn't stick, but I was so grateful while it lasted that I could help him feel better.
So interesting! I've noticed some white stickies coming now that dd2 is sick with a tummy bug. I'm hoping it's colostrum-ish in the immune building properties. I love having medicine in my boobs.
post #12 of 35
DD is still nursing and I'm planning to tandem if she is still when the baby comes. I don't really see her stopping, though. She's really casual right now, and sometimes only asks once a day, sometimes a handful of times, and it lasts about 2 seconds usually. And that includes the time it takes to switch boobs Sometimes she actually nurses for a while, but not usually.

I'm not entirely sure why she still wants to nurse every day.. it doesn't seem to be a comfort thing, it just doesn't seem like it lasts long enough to be, and I have been dry for months now.

I kind of think she's checking to see if she can get anything and I think she will be back to her booby loving self as soon as my milk comes in

Around 25 weeks or so it stopped being quite so painful when she latched on, it's still tender, but not the knock-the-wind-out-of-you kind of tear inducing pain that I was having

As far as contractions, I have been having a lot, period, so I'm not sure if nursing induces any or if they just happen. I haven't had any that I thought should cause me concern, so I haven't worried about it.

That is super cool about getting more milk in when your LOs got sick! I wish mine had I've been getting sick every time DD does, though, so I'm sure that doesn't help. I'm still really sad about losing all of my milk, and feeling really guilty, too. She was such a little nursing fiend still
post #13 of 35
I just wanted to crash this thread and give you mamas a big and support for tandem nursing!

I think it's such a beautiful relationship to share between a mama and siblings! If we have another babe soon after this, then I hope to hang on long enough to tandem nurse.

My dd will be nearly seven when our babe arrives and has been weaned since nearly 3yo, so no tandem here!

But my props to all of you who are able and willing to do it!
post #14 of 35
Quote:
Originally Posted by craft_media_hero View Post
I think it's such a beautiful relationship to share between a mama and siblings!
A friend of mine had twins and she posted on FB that now, at 4 mos. old, they hold hands when they nurse.

HOW FREAKING CUTE IS THAT??????
post #15 of 35
Jumping in. I still nurse my 28 mon old. I believe it about the colostrum and diarrhea issue in older babies....my dh has runny poo all the time...I was going to start potty-training but don't want to deal w/ the mess of her runny poo....I can deal w/ pee but not poo ....My 4 1/2 yr old tandemed when I had my now 2 yr old and the transition went so smoothly for her, so I will do the same when this baby comes along w/ my 2 yr old....I just don't know if she will continue when the milk comes in....only time will tell. Good luck to everyone. I loved to tandem...to hold both my babies in my arms. It is such a blessing

PS....My 4 1/2 yr old just weaned a couple of months ago, so not sure how that would of been to nurse 3 at a time...kind of relieved though
post #16 of 35
I wasn't planning to tandem, but while I was able to nightwean & cut out almost all of the daytime nursing, DD still needs to nurse to nap. I was hoping to get her to nap w/o nursing, but nothing worked. So now I'm just going to roll with it. I think she will wean & drop her nap at the same time, so I'd like to prolong that as long as possible.

I am just not sure how logistically I will nurse DD for her nap & deal with my newborn, though. We snuggle under the covers while she nurses. Where does the newborn go? DD hated being put down...
post #17 of 35
I'm 99.9% sure at this point that we'll be tandeming. I don't see her stopping if she hasn't stopped yet!
post #18 of 35
Reviving this thread to see how it is going for everyone in the third trimester.

For a few days now I have been feeling so uncomfortable and annoyed when dd nurses! Its awful. I just want to crawl out of my skin. I try to stay still as long as I can stand it and then distract her with something. It is especially bad when I am lying down for some reason. I know we can't wean this late in the game but I have no idea how I will get through the next ten weeks if this persists! Anyone else?
post #19 of 35
I weaned last week, right before I hit 30 weeks. I just couldn't take it anymore and was never really committed to tandeming. She said goodbye to the meemees and got one nice last nurse, and now accepts it when I tell her that they are empty. I am so happy that it happened and that it went so well and that I now have about 10wks for her to "forget" so that she won't freak when she sees the new baby nursing.

We had to give up the nap as well, but that ended up being less of a big deal than I feared. Now our life will be so much easier!

Though I am emotional about saying goodbye to such a tender thing with her... it is sad to know that she is no longer nursing, and she seems so big to me all of a sudden! I do miss it but that would be the case no matter when I did it, KWIM?

All that to say--it's really not too late to wean if you really want to.
post #20 of 35
Thanks superfastreader. I guess I just have this feeling that weaning will be so traumatic for my dd. She is still so attached to the num-nums. But perhaps I am underestimating her. Glad it went so smoothly for your dd and you still have time for her to forget.
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