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Still breastfeeding...planning to tandem? - Page 2

post #21 of 35
Originally Posted by sarmis35 View Post
Thanks superfastreader. I guess I just have this feeling that weaning will be so traumatic for my dd. She is still so attached to the num-nums. But perhaps I am underestimating her. Glad it went so smoothly for your dd and you still have time for her to forget.
My DD looooooooooved her meemee. I had the same fears that you did. But she gave it up so easily! We nightweaned her at 2 and then cut out all day nursing except for naptime and occasionally first thing in the morning. But that nap nursing--she would cry and cry and cry for meemee if I asked her to try to nap w/o nursing. At night she was just fine but for the nap I just couldn't imagine she would ever stop. So I gave up on the idea that she would nap and just said, "It's quiet time. You can do whatever you want but mommy's going to lay down. You can snuggle with me but you don't have to." She ran in and out of the bedroom for an hour doing god knows what in our (safe) living room, and I got a much-needed nap. She didn't seem to care that there was no meemee.

And then the last time she nursed it was first thing in the morning last week & I let her latch on, but said I would sing her favorite song to her and then it would be all done. She put her hand over my mouth b/c she didn't want me to stop, so I said, "You may have a chocolate chip when we're all done." She came off immediately begging for a chocolate chip. The next morning, the first words out of her mouth were, "I want a chocolate chip!" (I did not give her one LOL.)

I think that the key every step of weaning was to break certain associations. When we nightweaned, it was by having DH take over bedtime and nighttime comforting. When we mostly dayweaned, we had family in town and we spent a lot of time outside of home. And then for napweaning, it was all about letting go of the nap altogether.
post #22 of 35
Thank you for reviving this thread. Dd2 still asks to nurse a lot and I let her at bedtime, or when she is very, very upset (because it helps center her). But I dont have the nerves for extended nursing now that my boobs are feeling so sensitive all the time.

I kind of hope that she is not nursing when baby 3 comes, but I think I will play it by ear. If I have cracked, bleeding nipples in the beginning with baby 3, will I want my toddler latching on too when I finally get a break from nursing my newbornÉ Anybody have experience with thatÉ
post #23 of 35
Surfacing, I have no experience with cracked nipples. My only issue last time was engorgement which I think would be greatly helped by having a toddler nursing.

I don't think we will make it though. I just can't stand it anymore. When it was painful I could stand it, but this???? Its indescribable. We are down to just a minute of nursing when we do. I think we are giving up naps too.
post #24 of 35

Where are things at for you Mamas?
post #25 of 35
Thread Starter 
Still BF'ing my son (today he turns 1.5!)...I'm loving it more and more, so I'm definitely headed into tandem-land. I did get that book (Adventures in Tandem Nursing), and I probably need to re-read, because all sorts of practical questions are reoccuring to me: how do I make sure newbaby gets enough, should each kid get their own boob (DS likes to nurse on both sides right now)....that kind of thing.

How about you, Surfacing? Others?
post #26 of 35
Yes, we're still nursing here too. I am really looking forward to having milk again. It has been a bit of a challenge 'dry nursing'. I am sure the milk will feel much better. I look forward to nursing both my babes. I just have no real idea what I am getting myself into!

I have lots of questions too. Like, how do I make sure the baby gets all the milk she needs? How do I make sure the toddler doesn't become overly obsessed/jealous? How do I make sure to get some personal space when I have 2 babies and a husband all going for the same thing?!!

I havn't read adventures in tandem. If anyone wants to share the bits of wisdom with everyone, please feel free!!

Good luck everyone!
post #27 of 35
Also still nursing... though definitely less frequently. It looks like this one will be hanging on until there's milk again! I can't wait to see his face
post #28 of 35
Originally Posted by nudnik View Post
I can't wait to see his face
Same here! For the first time since my milk went away, dd told me yesterday: There's no milkies in there!?!
I look forward to giving her milk again. I feel bad she has not had real mama milk since she was only 20 or so months old.

I just can't wait to see what she says when there is an explosion of milk for her to have!!
post #29 of 35
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by mamakaikai View Post
How do I make sure to get some personal space when I have 2 babies and a husband all going for the same thing?!!

HA! Yes!
post #30 of 35
Thread Starter 
Here is some stuff I found on Kellymom:

Does my newborn always need to nurse first?

Although you may be advised to make sure the newborn always nurses first, this advice usually only holds for the first few days until your milk “comes in.” Prior to this point your breasts are making colostrum for the newborn (and it will transition into “mature milk” in the early weeks). This “liquid gold” is high in immune properties and agents that prepare the newborn’s gut for the milk to come. Because colostrum is in limited supply after birth, you will want to be sure that your newborn gets first dibs.

Often tandem nursing mothers find they have such abundant supplies after their milk comes in that little coordination is necessary. By monitoring your newborn’s pattern of nursing and signs of sufficient milk, you will know how best to coordinate your nurslings.

What positions are best for tandem nursing?

To find your best arrangement you will need to experiment and to try a variety of pillows (including a U-shaped nursing pillow). The positioning that works best is likely to change as your baby grows. Following are some options to consider:

* Initially, semi-reclining (with pillows behind your back) may be easier than sitting or lying flat.
* Double-cradle: both children in cradle position, with newborn’s legs resting on toddler.
* Double-football: toddler can have his/her head on a nursing pillow and body stretching away on the couch; alternatively, your toddler can be sitting next to you with knees away from you.
* Various combinations with one child in cradle position & one child in football hold.
* Try side-lying with the newborn on the bed; you can then have your toddler perch on your side, or kneel behind you and dip his head down (pop-over nursing position).
* Lying on your back: you can prop a child on each side with a pillow supporting their bodies.

Simultaneous nursing can be hard to coordinate at first, and for some women it triggers a strong agitation. It may get easier as your baby gets older and more used to nursing, and as your toddler gets used to the baby. Many mothers find that nursing each separately works well (and yes, this is still “tandem nursing”!).
post #31 of 35
Great thread! My 2yo (26mo) desperately wants her mama-milk to come back. I dried up VERY abruptly and early in the pregnancy, well before I was comfortable with her weaning-I think she was about 19 months? It was SO hard for her to not have it and she's never gotten over it. We've tried every weaning trick in the books and it just isn't going to happen. I have no doubt she'll be a happy nurser when her "tiny baby" arrives and brings the mama milk back

I can't wait to see her face either...she dry nurses now (unless I'm sore) and sadly pats 'her milks'...
post #32 of 35
My DS (27.5 months) is still nursing. Haven't been "dry" nursing for a while as I've had colostrum since 24 weeks, and that has made a difference in the pain level. Doesn't hurt nearly as bad as it did when I was truly dry. He's still nursing at naptime and at bedtime and shows no signs of being ready to wean. Also recently purchased "Adventures in Tandem Nursing" but haven't really been able to make much of a dent in it yet as I'm trying so hard to get our half-finished house put together enough for me to have a baby in the next few weeks! I am hoping that if I don't get time before the birth to read, that maybe in the first few quiet days afterwards I can just lay in bed and nurse and read and sleep while DH and my mom and my PP doula take care of everything else.

The one thing I am hoping goes away quickly is the agitation I feel sometimes when I nurse DS. It's that whole "touched out" feeling and the sensation of his latch and suckle is almost too much for me to handle and I just have the urge to swat at him like a fly to get him to go away. UGH! I always push through it but I just can't wait for that feeling to be gone.
post #33 of 35
Thank goodness to get so many updates here and see that we are not alone! Dd2 is still nursing and since colostrum has appeared a few weeks ago, nursing is FAR less uncomfortable. Karyn, I so hear you on the agitation thing... I find that I don't mind if a little baby is caressing and massaging my breast or my body, but to have my older toddler do it squeaks me out for some reason. So I don't let her - I take her travelling hand, kiss it and then hold it, or just hold my hand firmly over hers in a spot that I want her to stay, and she usually does. Sometimes she needs reminders.

I too am very curious to see how it's all going to work out with the NB needing to nurse frequently and dd2 will be testing all the boundaries she can to nurse as often as she can. Sometimes we would go a day without nursing, and then be back to 3-5x/day. Lately, she still likes a short nurse before sleep and sometimes will not fall asleep for her nap unless she's nursing (--when she knows I'm home, that is--).

I occassionally remind her that when baby comes, she will be sharing cici. She looks alarmed and emphatically claims ownership: "MY CICI!" I tell her, "No, MY cici. We have to share with baby."

I see her with her 8 wk old cousin and she adores him. But I have a feeling she is going to be jealous of the NB and have some difficulty adjusting to not being THE BABY anymore. She's still my little snuggle bunny and I don't know what we're going to do at night because she still likes to crawl into bed with me in the wee hours. I tried to tell dh that I can sleep in a bed with the NB on one side and dd2 on the other, but he's all paranoid about that. We'll see. I have a bassinet for the beginning but prefer to co-sleep so I can feel when baby stirs and needs to be fed.

I'm rambling on now. Thanks for sharing the info from Kellymom and yeah, if anyone has other tips, it would be helpful. I don't have time to read now either.
post #34 of 35
I weaned my 3yo at 32 weeks. I just couldn't take it anymore. Its been about 6 weeks now but sadly she still says "I need num-nums" more than once a day. Usually when she is very tired and wants to fall asleep. She has been learning to fall asleep without it though and that is a great thing. I am not sure what is going to happen once the baby is here and I have milk again. I would like to keep her weaned so I am going to see how it goes.
post #35 of 35
I'm still nursing my 23 month old and am 37 weeks. I am hoping that DD1 will share well! I think she'll be happy when my milk comes in! ( So will I! I hate spending so much money on hemp/coconut-milk for her when I can make stuff that's better!)
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