Reluctant bedsharing

[jenfl]

With DD, DH and I wanted to try co-sleeping/bedsharing. But I was just so scared and nervous around a newborn that I couldn't do it. Even with various snuggle nests, I never slept well. DH didn't either, and would wake up sore. DD was a terrible sleeper, period, because of long-undiagnosed reflux, so she slept poorly in our bed or in her co-sleeper next to our bed. It took until nearly 18 months for her to sleep through the night in her own crib, but I was really happy and thrilled when she did.

Now we have #2 (less than a week old) and, I'm sorry to say, I don't want to bedshare (although I'm fine with a co-sleeper next to the bed). I like my space, I like my own time to myself in my bed.

We had a 3 day stay in the NICU, and while there, DS slept relatively well swaddled in their bassinet. Now that we're home, away from the constant lights-on and beeping, he's not sleeping well separately. For the last 2 nights, I've ended up bedsharing with him, him sleeping snuggled up next to me in the crook of my arm.

I'm ok with it for now because I want some sleep. I'm even ok with doing it for a month or two. But I'd like to set ourselves up for a smooth exit from bedsharing in the near future and back to the co-sleeper, with the eventual goal of his own crib.

Any suggestions? I'm not looking for posts on the joys of bedsharing -- it's just not pleasant for me. I'm looking for ways that I can gently encourage habits that will make moving out of our bed easy for everyone.

Thanks!

[belltree]

Not that I have much experience yet. But my thought was, that you might get an easier transertime, if you let your baby sleep on it's own mattrace in your room.

I also find, that our son slowly moved away from us and although he sleeps with us on the same mattress, he might as well sleep on his mattress. I guess what I am saying is that every child is different and things might work out differently this time around.

[pianojazzgirl]

Congratulations on your new arrival!

I had the same experience as you with my first child. Cosleeping just didn't work for any of us. For some reason it worked really well with ds though. Come to think of it it's probably because after a bit my dh decided to go sleep in the guest bed. So anyway, I want to say that I get where you're coming from (no flames from me!).

Do you have your ds swaddled in bed now? Have you tried swaddling him and putting him in the cosleeper? Dd did sleep with us in our bed for the first few weeks, but then we just started putting her in a basinette right next to the bed. She was a pretty good sleeper though. I could nurse her into a deep sleep and just put her in the basinette and she'd stay asleep. One thing I always used with her were those baby sleeping sacks. That way she never kicked the blankets off (and woke up from getting cold).

Not sure if that's any help at all. Sorry!