3yo wakes up ANGRY after nap

[aiea]

Hi everyone,

If DD wakes up from an accidental nap (like if she fell asleep in the car) she has always woken up mad... better said, she is absolutely irate! She also did this when she had a regular, daily nap, but would wake up before her usual time.

She screams and yells and thrashes and tries to talk, but she's so upset she cannot get real words out. This goes on for up to 1.5 hours. On a scale of 1 to 10, she is at a hair-raising 10.

I have tried talking to her, cuddling her (she wants no part of it), asking her what I can do for her, giving her options (one at a time, "would you like to...?"), and then ultimately I just have to be there and wait it out.

Does anybody else's child do this? Any helpful hints? Once in a while she will ask for water or milk, because she has an association with its helping calm her down. Sometimes it works.

[beccabus]

My son does this 7/10 daily naps....why??? He was a high needs baby, perhaps this is a high needs toddler?

[Tuesday]

Both my sons have been like this as well. Angry, cranky and just plain miserable after their naps. My eldest son is particularly high needs, incidentally - very explosive boy. I couldn't figure it out until I realized DH awakes cranky as well and many other adults I know say they prefer not to nap as they find it hard to wake up and feel pleasant. So, I figured if adults had trouble waking up - seems natural a small child with an intense personality would feel similarly.

I've no solutions other than try to minimize transitions etc. upon waking up and ignore the crankiness.

[gorgorita]

DD is the same way. she is very mad, irritated unhappy after her nap but as you mentioned only if she wakes up before her time. i could've written this post. really, she does not want any hugs though she is a very gentle and cuddly babe.
i tried many things, nothing seems to help. i hope she outgrows it before a new baby comes this summer. she is 26 mo and is doing that since about 20 mo
she usually wakes up 1 hour into her nap and cries. i go get her and take her to my office where she sleeps in my arms for the rest 1 hour. or i sleep with her. Believe me, i tried all and everything and am very frustrated and at days angry at her for doing this but as of today i have no other solutions but to do it her way. she is in my arms as i am writing
just wanted to acknowledge your post and say you're not alone!

[Katie T]

My DS did/does this as well. I think he just gets woke up when he is in too deep of a sleep when he wakes and this is what causes it. I just wait it out, he usually doesn't want me to hold him until he wakes up a bit and then he will come cuddle with me and things start to slowly get better from there.

It's tough to watch IMO

[nsmith27]

My son is the same way , he fights like crazy, it is like he sees me but does not recognize me, I think U have to let go , until they calm down , and when they are calm then cuddle. I think also it is becasue they are in a deep sleep and they get jolted

[jspring0308]

My oldest DD (now 7) woke up from every nap angry and upset starting right before she turned 3. I tried everything and it was just miserable and awful regardless. So I stopped putting her down for a nap and things went back to "normal". She was happy and fun and went to bed at 6pm for close to a year! There were days that her daddy only saw her in the a.m. but it was worth having her/us happy. Yes, she still "needed" the afternoon nap but it was so miserable after she woke up that I decided adjusting her schedule was a better alternative.

[sondacop]

Did you try helping her back to sleep? I bf DD back to sleep and she wakes up normal later. If she doesn't get back to sleep she will become distracted after a while.

[aiea]

At least I know I'm in good company!

FWIW DD does not normally nap anymore, though she used to do this angry wake-up during "regularly scheduled" naps a year ago too.

I think sometimes it is a waking during an odd part of the sleep cycle, maybe the deep part or jolting awake like others described.

I know I used to have this problem myself - I would be irate and would go to the fridge and snack to better my mood. I tie eating to emotions (that's my dysfunction!) so for better or worse, that's what I used to do. Don't have this problem any more though, probably because I've changed so much of my sleep and myself since the kids were born. I wish I had more insight into why, and what's going on though.

Also, yes, we did try going back to sleep but it's a miserable mess unless it's really bedtime anyway, and then she's tired enough to let go and zonk out.