Is anyone else ok with their kids eating MOSTLY healthy, MOSTof the time? - Page 3

[Shellie]

We are at least 90% organic and minimally processed; I will not bring anything into the house that has HFCS, hydrogenated fat or artificial flavors, colors, sweeteners, etc. *unless* it's a special treat such as the occasional mainstream birthday cake or Easter chocolate, etc.
We do eat out, maybe 2-4 times per month. 90% of the time it's "real" food at a decent restaurant but we do go to Chik-Fil-A, Rubio's and this other Mexican somewhat fast-food place (Someburros for the locals) about once a month. I'm OK with this--I think it's enough and it's certainly 90% better than we used to eat and 100's of times better than most Americans.

[alexsam]

Us too. I think the idea is balance. My kids eat balanced, nutritious meals and snacks. Hippe granola perfect? No. But basically whole foods, crap-free.

But the "balance" in food is also social. When the ice-cream truck tinkles down the road, I cringe a bit at the "junkiness" of their ice-cream, but really, the happy memories of sitting on the front step eating sloppy ice-cream from the truck in the summer time with the kids on the block is worth more than the worry about the ingredients. We are also cool with birthday parties, grandparent visit treats, snowy day brownies and a Friday night desert or even a "blue moon" chinese food night. Really, those encompass less than 5% of the food they eat, but the times we do eat them, we appreciate them as fun and social.

Also, my kids don't have any allergies or food issues. Obviously, those need to be evaluated differently.

[St. Margaret]

This is what we do. I don't like knowing what "food" is junk and putting it into my body, but sometimes at the ILs, or eating out with a bunch of people, etc, we just relax about it. Things regularly consumed are very important to me (ie organic dairy the majority of the time, but an occassional bottle of milk while out all day at Disneyland? Fine). Oh, and never anything artificial (like colors or flavors) or HFCS. I simply don't trust that to not be out and out poison, esp for DD's tiny body and mind. Even costco has kosher hot dogs if the ILs really need to do that "special" thing with us (they think that's some huge deal, to eat lunch at Costco). And when she was smaller I was MUCH pickier about what she ate, yes even down to not wanting MIL to feed her the pesticide-laden strawberries she eats. I just always brought DD's food, not a big deal as people expect baby food for babies anyway.

I sometimes wonder how easy it is to gauge how we eat vs the majority. I tend to think we don't eat all that different, at least not from other Californians, but then I realize my "healthy" ILs keep tons of soda and Hersey's "chocolate" in the house at all times, never buy anything organic or whole wheat (we try to only eat whole wheat), eat fast food almost every day... and I see the teenagers I teach with such garbage to eat! Much of it sent from home, not bought at school even. I've only seen one student with something like no artificial fruit leather (she has ADHD, but I think her parents switched up her diet and she is doing SO well). They talk about the food they like during passing period and they all drink soda and eat fried foods regularly and that sort of thing. Granted, they ARE teens but it's not like they are buying this, they're only 13-16.

Mostly our family eats natural and organic whole foods, but I consider the 5-10% of not-so-good to be when we bake organic cane juice brownies or have all natural ice cream or dip our veggies in ranch for every bite The point is, it's impossible to really know what people are eating all in all, and I'm fine with moderation. The point is to keep it truly moderate. But if DD is eating the good dark chocolate, I'm not so worried when she asks for a third chip, you know? Or when she has the neighbor's birthday cake or french fries or gold fish crackers, b/c her tastes for dark chocolate, broccoli, and cous cous are well established. It's all fine for her!

[FREEmom1120]

Yes, this is how we eat. My kids are going to grow up knowing what is healthy to eat, what is not, and that it's ok to not be perfect.

[peaceful_mama]

I was REALLY picky with DS1. I used to get mad at my parents for giving him candy and junk popsicles and stuff. (when he was around 18 months-ish, not old enough to know what it was or ask for it.)

Now? I'm really glad I backed off of that. My dad probably enjoyed his last 2 years with his grandson more because of it.

I still used to cringe when DH handed DS2 cookies at under a year old...not old enough to ask for them or be upset if he got handed, say, an apple slice.

BUT...for the most part, I have realized that *I* control what *I* buy and give them. Other than that, I can *try* to talk to DH and get him to see my way....but ultimately, I can't stop him from going to the store and buying utter crap.

And since I came to the conclusion that this is a battle I don't want to fight, I have noticed some TINY better changes---like he buys *less* candy. He's open to going to Subway over McD's. And I'm sure if I baked and we never ran out of cookies, he would quit buying. (this is one I need to work on.)

They do know what McD's, Subway, BK, and takeout pizza are. They also *love* to tell me what fruit to buy when they go to the grocery store with me. (It's REALLY HARD for me to say no to a child who is begging for watermelon or strawberries...)
They haven't met a fruit they don't like, and they consider homemade-sugarfree-banana-berry smoothies to be a treat on par with ice cream.

They also eat ice cream--I have a freezer, or I buy "real ingredient' ice cream like Breyers or Haagen Dazs or similar.

Though they have had 'junk' ice cream too--I'm not going to say no if all the other kids around are eating it, the ice cream truck came down the street, whatever.

We've actually been 'bad' about eating out lately and I am trying to get back to a commitment to home-cooked, less-preservative type stuff.

[BarnMomma]

Originally Posted by mamadelbosque

I'm with you. I just roll my eyes at the threads that go "OMG! My kid is going to like, die
! Grandma/grandpa/friend/stranger let my kid have choc milk/soda/ice cream/whatever" I don't have the time or energy to stress over 100% organic, 100% from-scratch 100% non-proccessed foods. I just don't. And besides, I have zero interest in being "that" family thats just so. freaking.wierd.about.food. I really don't. *I* was that kid/family in school, and I just have zero interest in subjecting my kids (or myself) to that.

30 years ago when I was child those same foods were not 1/2 as bad as they are now. Now everything is corn syrup, preservatives, fillers, and synthetic everything. Meat, chicken, fish- the majority of it it's not safe for consumption. Fast food? It's not food. So I'm quite happy to be THAT mother who feeds her family wholesome foods. And I don't find it any more difficult than if I were to feed them junk. (A cooler makes life easy.)

When my son is older he can have more say in what he chooses to put in his body. My hope is that since he's seen how food is produced(thgouh the use of our gardens, trips to the farm where we buy meat/dairy, farm markets, he'll have enough insight to make smart food choices.

[waiting2bemommy]

We have had times when we were eating food bank/donated food and couldn't choose so there have been times when we didn't eat so well, but generlly speaking we eat simple but healthy. Still sometimes I make what *I* think is a healthy meal and then I come on MDC and see almost everything that was in the meal ripped apart. Which leaves me wondering, what CAN those people eat? We eat lots of rice and beans, whole grain bread, fresh (or canned, because of the budget) fruits. Ds is sensitve to HFCS and food dyes so I avoid them as much as possible but on our food budget I can't afford to buy the substitutes for typical junk food. We do indulge in slurpees a lot....I LOVE them and there is usually one flavor at least that has no red 40 (ds's main sensitivity), and when we are completely broke, for $1 on our EBT card it is a treat/outing for ds to go get a slurpee.

We are considered "weird" around here because we won't let ds have things like kool aid, hawaian punch, fruit roll ups, etc. I keep fruit leather in the car to offer as a substitute, but sometimes if it doesn't have any food dyes I will just let him have whatever s being offered.

We cook from scratch at home so I know he is getting 3 healthy meals a day. So I don't need to lose my mind over doritos or twinkies or whatever he gets when we are out. That is just too much stress for me, plus I really am trying to learn to pick my battles, and I believe there are much bigger hills to die on, like vaccines, and people using racist terms around my child. In the big picture the chips just don't matter that much.

[meemee]

i am with you.

its interesting though where everyone draws the line.

i draw the line at McDonalds. dd didnt get any McD till she was 5 and then discovered she hated it.

i allowed her to have soda from 3 i think but she just liked taking a sip from me and not really drinking it.

one of the reasons too i allow junk is coz dd hates most things junk : except for candy and icecream. she loves trying it and then screwing up her face. i dont think she has ever had kool aid and i have explained to her why i dont like sunny D instead of telling her not to drink it and she made the decision of not drinking it.

its funny that she has the option of eating junk but doesnt. she hates all fast food. she hates all children's meals. however she loves trying new things.

[Trinitty]

We are very good about 95% of the time.

I have a few hard and fast rules for safety:

No factory beef
(due to Mad Cow disease, I worked in Agriculture, and cows should not be cannibals)

No aspartame
(We do not trust it)


No Trans fats
(This is an abomination of oils and fats. No matter how fit you are, this altered substance ruins your arteries, you cannot work it off)

I am trying to eliminate HFCS because of the effects on the liver and pancreas, it troubles me almost as much as transfat, but, glucose-fructose is in many things... I think I have avoided it pretty well though.

I also try very hard to avoid artifical colours and flavours.... but, I don't want to be a tyrant, she love candy.

All this being said, DD does get candy and chocolate (with just plain sugar! LOL) a few times a week, and she gets chicken fingers and french fries about once a month or so.... if you check the nutritional content they provide, you can make sure there are no transfats. She does love ketchup, and I am now planning on bringing out own with no HFCS.... sigh.

She gets some goldfish crackers, "sensible solutions" cookies, etc. I think we are fortunate that we can get alll of the ingredients and content nowaday.

All in all, she eats better than I did as a child. No hotdogs, cheese wiz, etc. Basically, I try to avoid fake foods and dangerous things.

I do my best! But, I don't want to restrict her so much that she rebels when she is older.

Trin.

[major_mama11]

We do the best we can, without completely stressing about it. DD is allowed to have candy on holidays and such, but no soda or candy on a daily basis. At least, not when I'm around- I can't control what DH feeds the kids when I'm at work. During Easter, she kept giving her candy to her cousin, so she must not feel too deprived.

The way we eat would probably horrify some, since we allow some sugar and some processed foods, but yet my in-laws think that I am an obsessive health nut just because I don't let them feed my infant M&M's , or give sugary drinks to my cavity-prone daughter (they always pretend to "forget" about her teeth, despite my explaining this issue over and over).

I think it would be easier to eat healthy all the time if we did not live next door to DH's family, who are all junk-food-aholics. I know that DH lets them feed DD junk food when I'm at work. However, I feel that the positive effects of interacting with these older relatives so often is worth my annoyance about her being fed crap food more than I would prefer. I know that these relatives will not likely be around when DD is older.

Eating healthy is important, but quality of life is about more than just the food we eat. That being said, I am working on improving our diet, and the foods that baby DS eats regularly are much healthier than what I fed DD at the same age.

[HeYunyi]

Trinnity, do you think it's possible to not allow any trans fat without becoming one of "those" parents? It's frustrating for me because it's a pretty rare family/social get together that the dessert does not contain transfats and often the side dishes do as well. Most of these are actually listed as being transfat free because there is less than .5 grams per serving. But when you have several side dishes and dessert with .49 grams of transfats per serving or something like that, that can add up to way more transfat than anyone should eat.

Right now my son is 18 months, so I am super strict about what he eats but I know I can't do that forever, unless I do want to be one of "those" parents.

[Trinitty]

Hello HeYuni,

Oh, I am already one of "those parents" but, I was one of "those people" before we even had DD... so, I am okay with it. I am used to being looked upon as a freak when it comes to many things... even if some of it is unwarranted.

I would be willing to put up with the family grumbling when it comes to transfat, for me, it is a safety issue, not a nutritional one... so, I would insist upon it.

I use the Earth Balance "shortening" and real butter and good oils for baking, and it works really really well. I even sent a box to my father who bakes pies all. of. the. time. and asked him to please use it for my DD's pie, and he did... he knows I am a spaz, but he also knows that I have good reasons. I am lucky because my mom and three sisters are all really vigilant about it too.

I would have a major problem if we went to my inlaws though.... as my mil uses ONLY the margarines that are loaded with transfats, factory beef, white everything, iceburg lettuce, factory eggs, diet pop, "punch" etc, etc. But, we have almost no contact with them at this point.... so it's not an issue.... but, again, my DH is onboard with me, and I know that while he may grumble about my refusals/obsessions for appearances sake, he would agree with me, fundamentally.

So, sorry to ramble, but I would just stand firm on transfats, and bring PLENTY of my own baked goodies that do not contain transfats for my child to eat. Who knows, maybe you would win a convert! LOL

Trin.

[mamazee]

The 5% of stuff my dd eats that isn't healthy could be laden with trans fats, HFCS, food dyes, whatever. It doesn't matter to me. So long as the basis of her diet is healthy, IMO a small amount of that stuff doesn't matter.

[sanguine_speed]

Originally Posted by Trinitty

I use the Earth Balance "shortening" and real butter and good oils for baking, and it works really really well.
Trin.

I must need tips. This stuff ruins all my baking!

[limabean]

It's interesting how some people are kind of rolling their eyes at "those" parents, while simultaneously saying that they are perceived as "those" parents by some people in their community. I guess it's all relative -- the people being classified as extreme on this thread are probably just doing what they think is right and best, just like we all are. I tend to be fairly relaxed about food, but if another family chooses to go vegan or all organic or GFCF or avoid HFCS and red 40 or whatever, I'm okay with that.

[Hoopin' Mama]

Hey, you know what I say?

Be one of THOSE parents if you wish.

All that means is that you are intentionally living up to your ideals. I don't see the harm. We can't parent within the parameters of someone else's comfort level, especially if it goes against our core values.

[Quinalla]

She isn't eating anything but breastmilk yet, but yes, I plan to feed her mostly healthy things most of the time, but yeah, eating out occasionally and easier snacks when out and whatnot I totally plan to do. That is how I was brought up and it worked great for me

[Super~Single~Mama]

Man, this thread made me feel really bad about our eating habits!

I'm a single mama law student, I don't get child support (yet - long story, don't ask), and things are TOUGH right now. Right now, I'm lucky to get food in my mouth before I go to sleep at night (DS is always well fed, but its not always the most healthy, organic, wonderful food that he should be getting). It's so hard for me to find the time to cook, and find the time to be the mother I strive to be. I put my mothering and patience above healthy foods on my list of priority's (DS eats pretty well, he's definitely not eating sugar at every meal - we try to balance out veggies/fruits/grains/meat but its tough some days).

I'm doing the best I can. It's not easy to eat healthy all the time! Or even most of the time for some of us...

[griffin2004]

I'm totally fine w/ a "healthy most of the time" diet for my DD. She's a kid, for god's sake, not a robot.

For me, life lived at the extremes is oppressive.

[mamadebug]

Originally Posted by Amila

Majority? Really? That is interesting, because I know that where I live, the vast majority of moms really feed their kids junk pretty much all the time. Kraft mac and cheese, hot dogs, pb&J, and pizza make up 90% of the food kids eat around here. The only fruits and veggies kids know about are bananas, apples, and oranges. Maybe carrots. I am usually the outcast for bringing healthy snacks for preschool. Maybe it is just my area?

We do lots of gardens, farmers markets, and eat 75% organic. I AM trying to cut back the juice consumption though- my kids looove juice. My goal is to get them to love water and tea more

And for the record, I definitely need to eat better. My kids eat waaaayy better than I do, lol.

Maybe the majority on MDC? I know in real life, the majority of people I know feed their kids kind of junky food or "kid friendly" food a lot of the time.

We eat mostly healthy, most of the time, too. Obviously, if you have a child with real food allergies, you have to feed and protect your child accordingly.

But, I have a friend who has become like the moms in the OP's first post. She was pretty healthy to start, but really has taken it to another level. Food is a major deal now, seriously impacts their day and activities with others (either they can't eat out or they have to leave to get home at a certain time in order to have time to prepare everything from scratch....). It ends up feeling like a real control issues in their family.

I think you have to eat healthy most of the time in order for your child to learn healthy eating habits. I also think it is important to indulge in not so great stuff sometimes so your child can learn to do that in a healthy way, too, and not go crazy with food/candy/etc once they are old enough to have more freedom around this issue.