I feel like I hate my older child. On a daily basis, I experience out-of-control anger directed triggered by her. For example, recently I wanted to take a nap. My husband refused to take the kids. I had just finished pottying the baby. I don't even remember exactly what I did, but newborn shit was on all of the walls, floor, etc... This is not like me. I regret having my new baby - it's just been too hard of an adjustment. I feel incredibly guilty about my less-than-gentle behavior towards my older child. I'm constantly yelling or threatening her. I feel overwhelmed by everything. I've made my husband stay home one day from work because I couldn't handle it. I don't know what to do. Is this PPD even though the worst of it is the rage and it's directed at my older child? Or something else? How do I get help?
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4/7/10 at 3:45pm