Question about tandem nursing toddler and newborn...

[jodieanneanton]

We just brought home our second child from the hospital this week! Her older sister is 2 1/2 years old and by the end of my pregnancy was down to 1-2 nursing sessions a day. The plan was to continue to practice child led weaning even if it meant tandem nursing. Since the little one arrived, my toddler's requests for nursing has increased dramatically! Up to even more than baby nurses!!! Any suggestions on how to deal with this? I know that this is normal and that the older nursling often just wants to know that they CAN nurse if they want to. We are trying many things to keep my oldest occupied while baby is nursing, including special snacks, TV time and setting her up with an activity. Then, after baby is done nursing, big sister can take a turn. Sometimes, they nurse at the same time. My question is how did your older nursling respond to a new person on his/her "turf?" Did he/she increase requests for nursing? How did you respond? And finally, how long did that new behavior last?

[sarahtdubb]

Congrats on your new baby!

I have the same age difference with my two--my baby is now 8 weeks old. I DEFINITELY saw this big uptake in nursing in my toddler. I think part of it was seeing his sister nurse (which he thinks is great, he loves sharing "mama milk" with her); I think an even larger part was that for a couple weeks I was home all day sitting on the couch or in bed. Usually our routine is much more active, and I think being home more just made him think of nursing more.

That was fine when I had lots of support at home, because I could nurse him whenever he asked, and I did. I figured we were all going through a lot of changes, and I didn't want to start saying no to him too soon. But now that I am on my own with the 2 kids during the day, it is much harder to say yes-- often I have the baby in the sling, etc., and nursing just isn't an option.

I won't lie, this has been a point of stress lately. Whether he is just going through a stage independently, or it is a result of the baby (who knows!), he is relying on milk more as an emotional crutch, which he never did before. he was never a kid who wanted to nurse after he got hurt, etc.--now if he gets frustrated with a toy he comes running asking for mama milk.

I am working now at helping him establish more of a routine for milk (I tell him we have "special milk times"-- wake up, nap, and before bed (he doesnt nurse to sleep but has milk as part of his routine). When he asks for milk other times I offer him a cup of milk. He is starting to get used to is.

He is an active guy and has time calming down, and I think nursing offers him a way to zone out and relax--so I have also started offering movie time in lieu of nursing, and he readily accepts!

So, yes, I believe it's totally normal to see an upsurge in nursing. The week my milk came in with the new baby, my toddler ate virtually no solid foods. But as we are getting back into our normal routine of getting out and about, hes getting back to his formal nursing habits.

[PGTlatte]

Our DS1 was 2.5 when DS2 was born. I had stopped nursing him the last trimester of the pregnancy because I was having too many/too strong contractions. So when DS2 was here and I had milk again he was really excited about it and wanted to nurse a lot. After a couple of weeks I decided to limit him to once in the morning, once for his afternoon nap, and once in the evening. At first he protested but then settled into the new schedule and was quite happy with it, and we all had a happier day together. As he got older, he would forget some of his sessions as he moved toward weaning.

[pbjmama]

It is normal. I didn't like nursing both of my kiddos at the same time so I would have them take turns. When I nursed my older child I would often say something like 'baby, now it is big brothers turn for milk so you need to wait' to remind my older child that he was still very important to mama.

I don't remember how long it lasted. But having an older one nursing did help me out several times with plugged ducts, I was very thankful that my toddler could get those out in a minute or two when the baby was too full to nurse or sleepy!