9 year old was looking up porn (and not the vanilla stuff) - Page 2

[EFmom]

We had the same issue with my nine year old dd. I had no doubt it was her and not dh as he's a much better speller. And it was done at a time when I was sitting watching TV with dh at my side.

She was looking for stuff specifically related to one pop singer, but in a most definitely sexual way that made my eyes bug out. I brought it up by talking in neutral terms about the singer at breakfast the following morning, and she almost immediately burst into tears.

We had a long talk about why searching for that stuff is a bad idea. I think she had gotten into one of those sites with all sorts of pop-ups and she had a hard time turning it all off. That was scary for her. We talked about how easy it is to get into stuff you really don't want to see (which I think happened), and viruses, and the fact that if you get certain inapropriate sites, even if you didn't mean to, you can be in trouble with the police. (underage porn).

We also talked about how she could come to us about questions, and we discussed the books that we have that deal with sexuality in an age-appropriate way. We are pretty open about sex and always are willing to discuss anything.

We haven't had a repeat of the problem.

[dhammamama]

Originally Posted by waiting2bemommy

totally putting myself out here with this but just wanted to say that at 11 or 12 i was googling some pretty hardcore porn....I won't detail it all but it definitely had a sexual component, I mean I wasn't just idly surfing and stumbled on it, and it was my way of proccessing sexual abuse that had happened much earlier. I had already had those inclinations/urges by the time I was 5 but obviously a 5 year old is not sophisticated enough to search for porn. If my 9 year old really was looking at those things it would be a HUGE gigantic red flag....more like a banner....that she was being or had been sexually abused. and fwiw my abuser did not show me porn....the interest in "not vanilla" stuff was my way of wroking out/coping with what I experienced. OP for your dd's sake I really really hope it wasn't her searching that stuff.

Safe hugs if ok, waiting2bemommy and thank you for saying this. My thoughts as well-- and I hope it's not the issue.