Constant, non-stop tantrum with 13 month old.

[skybluepink02]

My daughter has just been a pill lately. I hate to feel that way about her, but honestly!

She's started having tantrums. Full blown, go limp, throw herself on the ground and scream bloody murder tantrums! I'm a a loss. I'm pretty confident with older toddler tantrums, because you can eventually calm them down and talk with them. I'm not sure what to do about tantrums at this age.

Anything sets her off. If she's crawling and dragging her blanket, she screams if it gets stuck under her knee. If her twin brother strokes her head, if I pick her up, if I don't pick her up.

It's to the point where she's having tantrum approximately every 10 minutes while she's awake. I've got another baby (her twin) to tend to, so I can't be at her beck and call all the time. Is there any way I can help her deal with her frustration better?

[ainh]

Oh hugs. Is she walking well already? My guy threw terrible tantrums from age 12-14 months (he still hits his head hard enough on the floor that he has a constant bruise there...does it any time I say N-O to him). Mine seems to be a sensory seeker and I'm slowly finding ways to help him control his energy/anger. In any case, my heart goes out to you...I know how tough it is and I don't even have a twin to tend to!

[JessieBird]

We just went through 6 weeks of this. It was hell. The hardest time of my life I think. I'm pretty sure that in our case it was teething, could that be what's going on with your daughter? Three molars popped up after the first week of tantrums then a fourth four weeks later. We have nothing to show for the most recent week of tantrums but that doesn't mean that there aren't teeth down there causing misery beneath the surface. The tantrums stopped suddenly about 4 days ago and it's been like night and day (or devil and angel would be more accurate!!!). My happy baby is back though I know we probably have more of the rough stuff ahead.

As for what to do in the mean time, I never found anything that really helped us. Distraction and diversion helped for a moment or two. New toys helped a bit. I was much more permissive with things like eating crayons - if it made him happy for three minutes, I let him do it. I held him and carried him a lot. If I was too tired to carry him anymore (in the evenings), I'd do things like prepare all the dinner ingredients down on the kitchen floor so that he could help and make a mess. We went for lots of walks, especially in the evenings, and had lots of "emergency" baths to calm him down. He slept with me and I let him nurse all night long. We discovered that chocolate chip cookies can be a perfectly acceptable dinner.

Part of me was really worried that being this permissive was just going to make things worse in the long run, especially at times when I doubted the teething theory and wondered if we were into a nasty new stage. Thank goodness now that he is back to his old self, I've been able to get back to our old healthy, safe habits and "rules" with no trouble at all.

My DS also had a permanent forehead bruise, it broke my heart!

[skybluepink02]

Oh, man. I'm glad to hear it's not a permanent thing. She's not walking at all yet. She didn't crawl till 11 months, and they were two months early, so she's more of a 11 month old, developmentally. It's interesting that you said your son is a sensory seaker, Ainh. I was actually asking a question a few weeks ago about Emaline and sensory things. I wonder if the two are together, somehow.

As far as teeth, the poor bugger has all her teeth, including molars. She has 16 teeth!

I'm glad to hear your son reverted to normal habits, JessieBird. I worry too that I'm setting her up for bad habits if I keep giving in to her tantrums.

[twinergy]

Hi,
My experience is limited to my twins (now 2.5 yo), but the only time I saw something like the non-stop tantrums is when there was something physical going on, e.g. teething, flu, overtired, hungry. I notice in your signature that your twins were born at 33 weeks, did your DD have any complications? Aside from that and what PP mentioned the only other thing I can think of is an allergy or intolerance issue; maybe a newly introduced food. I hope you find what your DD needs.


--------------------
ETA:
I just thought it might be something like an ear infection.

[skybluepink02]

Maybe. I hadn't thought about that. She's always had problems with weak oral muscles. I pump for her because we had to thicken her milk until she was 9 months old so she didn't aspirate it. No other major complications. She hasn't really had anything new added to her diet, but I might look for food sensitivities. She's pretty close to walking. Maybe she's frustrated?

[lifeguard]

Ds went through a period of this which was shocking 'cause he's such a happy, easy going guy usually. I started to just simply say "I know you're frustrated" & hold him or stroke him until he felt better. Frankly, though he usually would push my hands away. He's pretty much completely stopped now unless it's something a bit bigger & now the tantrums are much shorter.

This to shall pass.

[Anna's Lovey]

"She's pretty close to walking. Maybe she's frustrated?"
My lo was a pill the weeks leading up to her learning to walk. And then after that... she was a completely different child.
Good luck to you!

[twinergy]

Originally Posted by skybluepink02

As far as teeth, the poor bugger has all her teeth, including molars. She has 16 teeth!

It just struck me that she should be getting 4 more teeth before she is done. Maybe this is her 2 year molars coming in.