picky eaters

[dachshund mom]

If DD (13mo) doesn't want to eat what I've made for dinner, should I get her an alternative that I know she likes? I'm not talking french fries or hot dogs, but healthy things. For example, last night I made a roast with potatoes and carrots. She doesn't like any of those, so after she pushed the food around a while, I cleared her tray and got her usual favorites - peas, beans, and ww pasta. This happens a lot with breakfast also, and I end up making her some cheese toast or french toast (no syrup/sugar) after she won't eat.

Is this the right approach? As long as the substituted food is equally healthy I thought it was fine. DH thinks she'll eat more if she learns there is no alternative coming, but we're not sure.

[Llyra]

I think you'll find there are a lot of different takes on this issue, with healthy, happy kids as examples that either way works just fine. Here's my point of view:

With my first, I did. It made sense to me to let her have what she wanted.

With the twins, I didn't.

What happened with DD1 was that gradually the list of things she was even willing to put in her mouth got smaller and smaller, until she was literally eating the same meal every single night. I wasn't going to go down that road again. Variety is necessary for good nutrition-- we need to eat a variety of foods in order to get all the vitamins, minerals, and essential fats that we need for optimal health. Plus, I came to believe that children should learn to eat the foods their family eats, rather than being given special "kid food," and it seemed to me with DD1 that over time the things she was willing to eat became more and more what we think of as "kid food"-- a lot of carbohydrates, and not much in the way of essential fats and fruits and vegetables.

So my approach, the second time around, was to plan a good meal with a few choices, and let them choose among the choices. If they elected not to eat, that was fine, and no comment was made, and I assumed they'd make up for it at the next meal, or with breastmilk.

[nsmith27]

I agree choices is good, Luckily I still breast feed Jr, Last night all he wanted was almond butter and the funny thing is that at first I was wanting to eat what I made, but he was eating something that was nutriouse , so I backed off. I think they are still figuring everything out still on what they like and dont like.

[just_lily]

I usually give DD a plate of whatever we are eating, and add a few extra things that I know she will eat, like some cheese and cut fruit. She seems to be more willing to try things when there is something on her plate that is familiar.

I am also hoping that she won't build up the expectation that if she refuses to eat something that Mum will get up and get her something else. Only time will tell if that will work though.