I'm not sure what to do. My 7 year old DD goes to a small school....there are only 5 other girls there her age. She is friends with all of them and has one "best friend". However, none of them seem very nice at all. From what she tells me, they frequently boss her around or won't let her play their games. She often sits alone at lunch. Her best friend seems the worst of all. Always engaging in blackmail (give me X or I won't like you), ignoring her, etc.
My daughter is very eager to please. She is an only child and friends seem very important to her. She makes little presents (pictures, etc) for the girls and puts lots of thought into it. It is really obvious that these friendships are much more important to her than to the other girls.
I've tried the usual things...playdates one-on-one with these girls, sending extra treats in her lunchbox, etc. They do have fun a lot, but it seems more cruelty than fun these days.
I was bullied a lot in non-violent ways, but it still completey affected my self esteem. It shaped me in a very negative way. I'm scared of that happening to her. I don't want her to lose confidence and self esteem. I already hate the fact that she is so eager to please these rather mean little people. She asks me what to do, and I honestly don't have a clue....nothing ever worked for me as a child. I feel like a mama-bear and I tell her not to let people talk to her that way/boss her around, and that obviously her best-friend isn't really much of a friend. But she says she wants to have a friend, so I feel so bad...it is slim pickings at that school. She says she tells the teacher, but nothing happens. Shouldn't there be a mediation program for such young children to work out problems?
Here's a wrench: we are at a really great school on full scholarship. This is our first year. I already feel like a bit of a loser surrounded by all these super-rich people, and I feel like I'm causing trouble by meeting with the teacher, but I am going to have to. Sometimes I feel like just homeschooling, and if it was an option for me I probably would. I know she needs to learn to deal with conflict, but I hate seeing her so innocent and sad, and these kids are just so MEAN.
My daughter is very eager to please. She is an only child and friends seem very important to her. She makes little presents (pictures, etc) for the girls and puts lots of thought into it. It is really obvious that these friendships are much more important to her than to the other girls.
I've tried the usual things...playdates one-on-one with these girls, sending extra treats in her lunchbox, etc. They do have fun a lot, but it seems more cruelty than fun these days.I was bullied a lot in non-violent ways, but it still completey affected my self esteem. It shaped me in a very negative way. I'm scared of that happening to her. I don't want her to lose confidence and self esteem. I already hate the fact that she is so eager to please these rather mean little people. She asks me what to do, and I honestly don't have a clue....nothing ever worked for me as a child. I feel like a mama-bear and I tell her not to let people talk to her that way/boss her around, and that obviously her best-friend isn't really much of a friend. But she says she wants to have a friend, so I feel so bad...it is slim pickings at that school. She says she tells the teacher, but nothing happens. Shouldn't there be a mediation program for such young children to work out problems?
Here's a wrench: we are at a really great school on full scholarship. This is our first year. I already feel like a bit of a loser surrounded by all these super-rich people, and I feel like I'm causing trouble by meeting with the teacher, but I am going to have to. Sometimes I feel like just homeschooling, and if it was an option for me I probably would. I know she needs to learn to deal with conflict, but I hate seeing her so innocent and sad, and these kids are just so MEAN.
