Toddler spitting

[organicpapayamama]

Idk if all toddlers go through this or if its just something my DS has picked up. At least he doesnt spit on people. But I find him playing with his spit more and more. Its so gross to me. I bought this little drawing board for him that you fill pens up with water and you draw on the fabric. Its a great toy but I find that even when the pen has water to dray he will start using spit to draw. So gross. Then when he doesnt have that toy he will start to drip spit on his regular toys like cars and stuff. He has started spitting on the couch as well. We have a fabric couch and pillow and I find wet spit stains (and dry ones as well) all over the fabric. I tell him that we dont spit. That spitting is yucky. And he always says sorry but then turns around and continues to do it. How do you deal with this? when do they get past this?

[laughymama]

Well, my son DOES spit at his friend but she thinks it's hilarious and spits back. Gross to us? Yeah. They think it's the best thing in the world. He spits on toys and plays with his saliva as well.

We're ignoring it. Anytime we've tried to tell him we don't spit he just cracks up and does it more. (This is typical behavior for him. ) So we act like it's no big deal and it eventually has tapered off and he doesn't do it nearly as much as he used it.

I'm lucky though. He's never spit at someone other than his friend and never out of anger or anything...so we've not ever had to really deal with it on any other level than the ick factor for us.

[LCBMAX]

We parents are making things worse at our house because we're so ambivalent about it.
On the one hand, yuck.
On the other hand, really not at all worse than the snot that flies around when he has a cold and rubs his nose on my shoulder.
On the one hand, yuck.
On the other hand, self exploration is cool and necessary so go ahead but only ... in the ....? toilet? - no, I don't want his face so close to that!
... in the....? sink? - meh, not excited for him to do that at daycare.
... in the.... ? trash? OK, I guess, but it sort of depends on what's already there!
... in the... ? dinner plate? Yeah, if he remembers which is HIS!

We are vaguely developing some consistency about redirecting to the nearest appropriate receptacle, or outdoors.

[twinergy]

I read about this in Becoming the Parent You Want to Be by Laura Davis and Janis Keyser and really liked their suggestions on talking to toddlers about it.

Give information: “I get really upset about spitting. It can hurt people’s feelings.”
“I don’t like spitting. You could give your friend your cold by spitting on her.”

Set limits and redirect the behavior: “I don’t want you to spit at your friend, but if you want to experiment with spitting you can do it outside, away from people.”
“You can do it in the bathroom sink when you brush your teeth.”
“We don’t allow spitting in our house. If you are angry, you can tell me ‘I’m mad!’”

[organicpapayamama]

thank you mamas for your input. I guess its not really spitting... its more that he is playing with his saliva. I just want to let him know thats gross and not acceptable. hes still little (2) so I guess I have to wait for him to actually get that its gross.

[Thalia]

Originally Posted by twinergy

I read about this in Becoming the Parent You Want to Be by Laura Davis and Janis Keyser and really liked their suggestions on talking to toddlers about it.

Set limits and redirect the behavior: “I don’t want you to spit at your friend, but if you want to experiment with spitting you can do it outside, away from people.”
“You can do it in the bathroom sink when you brush your teeth.”
“We don’t allow spitting in our house. If you are angry, you can tell me ‘I’m mad!’”

My daughter loves to experiment with spitting fluids she's drinking, and sometimes playing with spit. Both drive me crazy, so we do the above.

I tell her that we don't "make fountains" at the table, but she can do it later in the bathtub. As far as I'm concerned she can spit as much as she wants in the bath because 1) it's not going to get on me and 2) it's not going to make a mess that I'll have to clean up.

She still wants to spit other places, but usually reminding her as stated above really helps keep the behavior that drives me crazy to a minimum.