How do I fix this? 3year old at night

[mamaD]

DD is three, and sleeps in her own bed. We coslept when she was an infant, it was great then, not so great as a toddler, and separate beds worked better for both of us. Now, at 3+ bedtime is a disaster. She refuses a 'routine', wants to change her pajamas 3 times (if she's wearing any at all), comes up with every excuse under the sun for getting out of bed (needs to use the bathroom, a drink, diff PJs, light on/off, etc). It takes over an hour to get her to sleep. I can't stay in there with her- after she goes to bed is my only downtime, and she spends the whole time kicking me besides. I've tried the if you are quiet I can leave your door open, but if you yell, I have to shut it. It doesn't work. Now she keeps 'falling' out of bed- no, she's climbing out. Door shutting with that doesn't work too well with that either.

I don't know where we went wrong, so I'm at a loss for how to fix it. Any thoughts would be appreciated.

tl,dr: Bedtime is a mess at our house

[momma_bear]

Do not tolerate the PJ changes or bedtime delay tactics. Get her set up with everything she needs (glass of water by the bed, etc.etc) and inform her that she does NOT leave the bed until morning. They KNOW when you really mean business. If she does get out of bed (which I'm sure she will at first) just calmly return her to her bed without any talking or giving in to requests and be firm. Repeat as many times as necessary...all evening if necess...until she gets the message. You'll have your evenings back soon

Good luck!

[MOTHEROFEIGHT]

As a mother of 8, no two went to bed the same way. One of the kids did not stay in bed however, the rule was that they must sleep on the floor if they came in our room...not our bed. As for the drama of not wanting to go to bed, eliminate all sugar after 5:00 that always made one of mine more difficult. My daughter and I decided that when she was little, she got dressed for the next day after her bath/shower...no pajama problems, fast start in the morning. Routine is best, even when on vacation.

[OkiMom]

We had this problem with DD1 a couple of weeks ago and ended up sitting down and talking to her about it. Ends up she missed Daddy (my DH has been working really long hours and not being home much) so she wanted to be up to be with him. A little extra Daddy TLC and it was solved.
Have you tried talking to her to see if theres a reason she is delaying? Maybe there isn't. If there isn't then I would limit the number of delays. Make sure she goes to the bathroom before going in bed, don't allow PJ changes (that in itself would drive me batty by the way), have a cup of water by the bed etc.

[newbymom05]

We've had good luck with a reward system for my DS1. We gave a yogurt raisin for every night he stayed in his bed. It only took a week or so for it to stick, and we stopped the reward (and he didn't seem to notice or care). My brother used a sticker chart and a trip to Sea World for his child's reward. My child was 4, my brother's 3 btw.

Now if I could just think of a solution for my 2 yr old!!!!!