I have resorted to declutter one thing at a time...& how I am solving the DH clutter

[Caneel]

So I am back on the decluttering wagon.

I got derailed do to lack of time and my DH.

Time, well there just isn't enough of it lately due to some family and work things.

DH, he is driving me nuts. I put a good sized pile together in anticipation of our town junk day and he was horrified. He started picking through it, questioning me on every single item.

Absolutely ridiculous. He even made a move toward openning a large trash bag that I had ready for the dumpster. I shut that down immediately. Step away from the trash bag buddy!

He isn't a hoarder or anywhere close to it. He operates under out of sight, out of mind. He can't wrap his head around that fact that we need to make our (huge) house more livable by making a place for what we need and getting rid of what we don't.

So, I have resorted to stealth decluttering a piece (or multiples of small items) at a time. I have taken grocery bags full of books and DVDs to the library and thrown out worn out clothing.

He won't say anything about things that are solely mine like clothing but anything that is considered household, he is having a fit about.

I haven't declared war on any of his stuff yet. I am thinking about getting huge plastic storage bins for the basment and putting his "treasures" in there.

I could care less what goes on in the basement as I never go down there. He can either clean them out or stack them up on shelves.

[sapphire_chan]

Keep moving his stuff down to the basement until he can't move down there and cleans it out himself?

[Ellien C]

That plan may not work. My basement is pretty immoveable, but it doesn't trouble DH.

When I ask him to bring something to the basement, he literally drops it in the first clear space he finds. Our canvas tent, which we use one a year was on top of my fabric, which I get into weekly. This was after the tent being in the living room for 6 months.

[HappyMommy2]

Filling up the basement doesn't sound like a great solution! It will probably drive you crazy and then cause marital strife.

If he agrees with "out of sight out of mind" then continue the stealth decluttering. He will like the results, and won't miss that ratty old t-shirt!!

When my dh is in a good mood, I can say something like "go pick 5 things from the closet to get rid of". The small goals help a lot!

[laohaire]

Do you have your own car? Can you stash stuff in the trunk? Will he notice?

I wouldn't declutter anything of his without his express permission.

I like to declutter but honestly I've gotten twinges too. When I see my DH has a big trash bag after cleaning out a room, I have to make sure I avoid seeing stuff in it. Usually he has it open (in anticipation of putting more stuff in it) and I have to sort of close it up without looking or I might see something!! I'm happy to have DH declutter it, I just don't want to know.

[Caneel]

I do have my own car but yeah, he would notice. It is an SUV and since we also work together, he walks past it a couple times a day. Piles in the back would catch his attention. It is also the family car that he drives when not at work

Stuff in the basement won't bother me at all. Our basement is large and almost empty. I could start a designated spot off to one side and forget about it.

I am going to ask him to address his coat situation. He has too many. My request this weekend is to lay out all the coats and point out which weren't worn this year and could they be donated?

[tinybutterfly]

Originally Posted by Caneel

Stuff in the basement won't bother me at all. Our basement is large and almost empty. I could start a designated spot off to one side and forget about it.

I just want to throw this out there...our basement looked fine when we first moved here ten years ago. We had some stuff stored down there, bought some new shelves, put more stuff down there and now ten years later and more shelves later it is a DISASTER down there, because once space to put more shelves wasn't avaible, "stuff" just landed everywhere.

Be careful.

My basement keeps me awake at nights.

P.S. And yes, I keep meaning to declutter down there, I have actually started decluttering down there a few times...but it is overwhelming.

[Fay]

My method was to get rid of one bag per week, and 3 years later, our clutter has significantly diminished. Keep up the good work!

[lolar2]

I'd suggest getting some utility shelves for the basement, lining the walls with the shelves, and getting some rubbermaid-type tubs. My parents did that when they moved and cleared out their storage locker, with the extra "non-urgent" boxes; now, they are going through the boxes one by one, but if they stopped for some reason, the basement would still look just fine.

[crunchy_mommy]

Have your DH go through his own stuff & the household stuff. He might be more willing to get rid of it if he has some control of what goes?? Or let him go through the pile of "discards" and pick ONE thing to keep? Or even go through it together & for each thing you get rid of, he gets rid of one thing...

[lolar2]

I keep reading this as "I have resorted to declutter one thing at a time... starting with DH."

[Caneel]

Originally Posted by lolar2

I keep reading this as "I have resorted to declutter one thing at a time... starting with DH."

HA!

No, he is definately a keeper.

We have a couple of sets of heavy duty commercial utility racking and that is where the tubs will go.

[lolar2]

Originally Posted by Caneel

HA!

No, he is definately a keeper.

We have a couple of sets of heavy duty commercial utility racking and that is where the tubs will go.

Perfect, on both counts.

[SleeplessMommy]

Originally Posted by Fay

My method was to get rid of one bag per week, and 3 years later, our clutter has significantly diminished. ...

You make it sound soooo easy!