Hi! I am going to *try* my best not to turn this into a novel... Please forgive any mistakes (NAK)
I will get to the facts. Dh has asked me twice to have my ds. 17 and dd 14 move in with their father. He lives in the same town as we do. I told him if they go then I go with the baby too. Now its getting ugly.
We have known eachother for over 10 years. We have been dating for 4. We decided to have a baby together and now we have dd 2 ( 2 years old) We have been living together for 3 years. Married for 1, Not once in this time has he done anything with my kids. He hates them for some unknown reason. They are never around and are always with their friends. In fact dd goes to boarding school and is only here every other weekend. So I don't know what his problem is anyway. They are NEVEr here!!
Whenever ds comes into a room dd doesn't even acknowledge the fact. Doesn't even look up or say hi.
Yesterday when ds was home for dinner dh didn't eat until he left the table.
DS hasn't noticed yet
No one in his family (clan) accepts us. They will call to wish the f'in dog happy birthday but no one called on my sons birthday. :-( His mother has more than once not introduced me to people. She has just flipped on past me like I am not there whild introducing others and dh thinks this is ok
He spends more time with his parents and doesn't go anywhere without telling them where (they live almost in our back yard) He has more to say to thim in 10 min. then he has to say to me in a week. another problem is that his mother doesn't respect any boundaries or private space and comes over every frickin day. Just shows up in our yard. She has even let herself in the house. DH thinks that this is fine
Over easter my kids were with their dad- It was his weekend. Saturday night we came home and lights were on in the basement. It was his dad petting the dogs.
Monday we came home from dinner and the tv was on and it was one of my kids. He said "they should at least call before coming over" and was really mad.dd just wanted to say happy easter 
The ils are another HUGE problem especially her. She has NO respect for my position as his wife or the mother of my dd. She even let herself in when my midwife was here and started telling her *she*wasn't going for a walk with the baby until the weather was nicer. What should *she* buy for formula she couldn't b-feed and I won't be able too either. ( 2 years later we are still b'fing
) Every time she gets the chance she keeps telling dd what a hard mean mama I am... No one says anything to her and I get in trouble when I defend myself. Everyone (sil, bil, dh ect ect) are mad at me because I won't leave dd alone with her... They think somehow it is her right to have her just because they live next to us. Whenever mil is around I have a HUGE instinct to protect my dd.. I have NEVER experienced this with my other two children.
dh is getting nasty to me.. last night when picking up poop in the yard he said to me next time whem you come out in the yard put other shoes on ( I had my shoes on that I wear in the house) Daily he says things like this to me...
I think his mother has a HUGE influence on how he treats me. I am also sure that all problems would be solved if I had a "time share" with the mil with dd. It seems everyone thought she would be raising dd.. Even if I did trust her she is 73!!! and my dd is a handful!
I know what I should do. leave but I am in a foreign country with no family here. I have about 10,000 dollars but its all tied up in a cd for another 2 years. If I left here my 2 older kids wouldn't go with... They are at home here.. I am feeling so trapped..
My kids aren't bad and I am not sure why dh hates them. He can't even say why. Just says he can't adjust...
Thanks for reading this til the end. I have no one here to talk to all my friends were his friends first and I am not sure I can trust them....
I will get to the facts. Dh has asked me twice to have my ds. 17 and dd 14 move in with their father. He lives in the same town as we do. I told him if they go then I go with the baby too. Now its getting ugly.
We have known eachother for over 10 years. We have been dating for 4. We decided to have a baby together and now we have dd 2 ( 2 years old) We have been living together for 3 years. Married for 1, Not once in this time has he done anything with my kids. He hates them for some unknown reason. They are never around and are always with their friends. In fact dd goes to boarding school and is only here every other weekend. So I don't know what his problem is anyway. They are NEVEr here!!
Whenever ds comes into a room dd doesn't even acknowledge the fact. Doesn't even look up or say hi.
Yesterday when ds was home for dinner dh didn't eat until he left the table.
DS hasn't noticed yet
No one in his family (clan) accepts us. They will call to wish the f'in dog happy birthday but no one called on my sons birthday. :-( His mother has more than once not introduced me to people. She has just flipped on past me like I am not there whild introducing others and dh thinks this is ok
He spends more time with his parents and doesn't go anywhere without telling them where (they live almost in our back yard) He has more to say to thim in 10 min. then he has to say to me in a week. another problem is that his mother doesn't respect any boundaries or private space and comes over every frickin day. Just shows up in our yard. She has even let herself in the house. DH thinks that this is fine
Over easter my kids were with their dad- It was his weekend. Saturday night we came home and lights were on in the basement. It was his dad petting the dogs.
Monday we came home from dinner and the tv was on and it was one of my kids. He said "they should at least call before coming over" and was really mad.dd just wanted to say happy easter The ils are another HUGE problem especially her. She has NO respect for my position as his wife or the mother of my dd. She even let herself in when my midwife was here and started telling her *she*wasn't going for a walk with the baby until the weather was nicer. What should *she* buy for formula she couldn't b-feed and I won't be able too either. ( 2 years later we are still b'fing
) Every time she gets the chance she keeps telling dd what a hard mean mama I am... No one says anything to her and I get in trouble when I defend myself. Everyone (sil, bil, dh ect ect) are mad at me because I won't leave dd alone with her... They think somehow it is her right to have her just because they live next to us. Whenever mil is around I have a HUGE instinct to protect my dd.. I have NEVER experienced this with my other two children.dh is getting nasty to me.. last night when picking up poop in the yard he said to me next time whem you come out in the yard put other shoes on ( I had my shoes on that I wear in the house) Daily he says things like this to me...
I think his mother has a HUGE influence on how he treats me. I am also sure that all problems would be solved if I had a "time share" with the mil with dd. It seems everyone thought she would be raising dd.. Even if I did trust her she is 73!!! and my dd is a handful!
I know what I should do. leave but I am in a foreign country with no family here. I have about 10,000 dollars but its all tied up in a cd for another 2 years. If I left here my 2 older kids wouldn't go with... They are at home here.. I am feeling so trapped..
My kids aren't bad and I am not sure why dh hates them. He can't even say why. Just says he can't adjust...
Thanks for reading this til the end. I have no one here to talk to all my friends were his friends first and I am not sure I can trust them....
