Sensory issues and potty learning

[mkat]

Hi all,

This is my first post in this forum. I've got a 4 year old DS with sensory issues. He is the picture of tactile defensiveness. We are at a complete standstill with potty learning. He refuses to poop in the toilet. He is fully aware of his body signals and will ask for a diaper when he needs to go. I have tried many methods to encourage him to use the toilet or potty to poop, and they all have backfired. He says he's scared to poop on the toilet and it "hurts" when he poops. He has zero distress/discomfort around pooping in a diaper, by the way.

I'd be grateful to hear your stories and suggestions. Thanks!

[KimPM]

I have a few thoughts.

Are you trying to get him on the regular toilet, or does he have a smaller potty? Perhaps he prefers the other one? If you use the regular toilet, does he have a stool to put his feet on to push? Has he ever done any poo on a regular toilet? Do you think the "splash" got some water on him and now he's developed an aversion because of that?

My DS, who also has lots of sensory issues, still prefers to use his smaller potties at home.

Not saying you want to try this, but this is how it worked for us (my DS was a late trainer too). He resisted pooing on any potty and would ask for the pull-up. One day he had some bad constipation and was so backed up, so I used a glycerin suppository. At that point, somehow I got him to sit on the potty (quickly!). He didn't have much choice once he got on there - it just all came out. After that, he realized it was no big deal and has been pooing on the potty ever since.

Anyway - do you think you could get him to poo while wearing a diaper, but sitting on the potty? It may be a very gradual process of getting him on there, but it would be working toward a final goal. Then once he's on there regularly sitting for poo, with his diaper on, you can start working on the next step. Have a hole cut in the diaper. Each time you gradually cut the hole a little larger, and eventually he's just going right into the potty.

[mkat]

Hi Kim,
Thanks for your reply. DS does have a little potty he can use, and the handful of time he has pooped on the potty over the last couple of years, has been on his small potty. The few times he's actually done it have not convinced him it's actually not a big deal, unfortunately.

I like the idea of cutting a hole in the diaper, and gradually making the hole bigger. That could really work for him. The first step will be having him sit on the potty in a diaper. He stands to poop, so this would be a really big change for him. I can see how I will need to break this down into small steps. I think he will be very resistent to any changes in his routine, however, but I also feel like allowing him to continue to be anxious and fearful about this is not in his best interest, either. I appreciate your thoughts!

[~Boudicca~]

Wow!

OP, I think we have the same kid. dd2 (she'll be 3 next month) may have a SPD (she is on the waiting list to be evaluated) and she has aced every aspect of potty learning, she is even dry through the night for weeks now, but she will.not.poop. on the potty. She refuses to use a little potty seat, she only wants to use the toilet. But when she has to poop she will bring me a diaper and wait on the floor for me to put it on there, then she will go hide behind the couch, come out when she is done, and bring me the wipes so I can take care of it.

Kim, that diaper thing is a good idea! I'll have to try that!