Babies who need more space/their own space? (To crib or not to crib, that is the question.)

[Beauchamp]

For a while now I've been trying to make cosleeping with a sidecar work. Lately I've been feeling like it's me that is making my DD wake up so often. I wonder of she'd sleep better in her own space. She wakes to nurse (crying) and often will resettle quickly. I can most times move her back into the sidecar. But she wakes so often.

The biggest thing for me is that she can sleep from 8pm or so until I come in the room, around 11~ish. She wakes anywhere from 5-15 minutes of me coming in and laying down. She's a light sleeper, and we have a rain/thunder CD playing at night. I think me being there wakes her up, and I wonder if she would sleep a longer stretch if I didn't come in.

Do you think she needs to be in the crib either further away from our bed, or in another room? I feel like I have to make cosleeping work, and I would feel like I was giving her less than the best to make her sleep away from me. But maybe it's ME that wants her close, rather than the other way around.

However, I don't want to nightwean or anything yet. If she needs me, I am there to nurse her. But if she doesn't *need* nursing, that's fine. I just wonder if *I* wake her up, and therefore she needs nursing to go back to sleep.

I don't know. I feel some guilt about the crib, since she obviously can't tell me what is best for her. I don't want to make her suffer, either way.

Thoughts or BTDT?

[alfabetsoup]

I'd try a detached crib in your room or in her own room. Some kids do need more space and quiet (my DD2 is one of them, loves her crib, won't sleep in our bed at all.) If you're there when she needs you then I think you're staying true to the AP ideal.

When cosleeping is working it means every body is sleeping reasonably well IMO. If you're waking your baby up when she doesn't want to be awake, then you both might benefit from trying something else.

[CherryBombMama]

we cosleep with a side carred crib, and although it works great for us, its more of my dh and i wanting to co sleep than my ds. he sleeps almost perfectly in a crib by himself, w/o waking at all (7ish to 6ish.) while cosleeping, he wakes maybe once in the night every other day or so. its mainy cuz of us talking, getting into a squeaky bed, etc.

i say try out the crib on the other side of your room for a bit.

just give lots of hugs and kisses all day long so you can get all those cuddles in

[LindsC]

That explains exactly how DS was. He needed his own space and would not cosleep after about 6 months old. He slept awesome in his crib and is now in the bottom bunk of a bunk bed and has very few nighttime sleep issues. The odd time that he does wake up crying, we always respond to his needs and he settles very quickly.