Soothing the baby has taken over my life...what else can I try?

[lizsky]

My DD is 6 weeks old, and I feel like its getting harder, not easier...I guess its because she is not sleeping as much as she did at the very beginning, but she isn't able to be happily awake for very long. I don't think its true colic because she usually stops crying if I rock her or bounce her, but I feel like my entire day is spent rocking and bouncing as she'll nod off and then immediately wake back up again. (And I do always check that she's fed and has a dry diaper)

Babywearing hasn't worked as well as I had hoped... she doesn't mind the sling or our other carrier if she's already asleep, but she cries in them if I put her in them when she's drowsy but still awake. And she often wakes up if I rock her to sleep and then try to transition her to the sling

What am I missing? What else could I try?

[Right of Passage]

no advice right now babe in arms, but I couldn't leave this post without sharing love and s

[moonglowmama]

maybe try having a few activities you could go to when she's awake- bath time with you, a walk around the block in the sling, dancing together, etc.

more later.

[Plummeting]

I'm sorry, mama! My new DD is a lot fussier than DD1, although mostly just in the evenings. I don't know what you mean exactly when you say she cries when you put her in a sling or carrier, but I will say that my DD usually doesn't like it initially. It really doesn't matter how we put her in or what we put her in, she usually fusses a bit at first, then calms down after a few minutes and usually goes to sleep. So if your LO is fussing for a few minutes, maybe try waiting it out to see if it stops? I know that at first I was taking my DD out right away when she started fussing. Then one night at 1 am, when she'd been up fussing since about 6 pm and I was out of ideas, I just put her in and paced right through her being upset about it. 15 minutes later she was asleep. The first 8 of those minutes were really hard, but nothing else had worked and it wasn't like I was abandoning her or anything. I figured it was better than putting her down and walking off, which was my next option because I was so frustrated. Since then I've done that several times. I can tell within about 3 or 4 minutes whether she's going to calm down and stop crying about it or whether she really is MAD about it. Sometimes she's just fussy and she's crying just because she's fussy, but other times she really doesn't want to be in there. You might not be able to tell the difference immediately, but you will know after a few minutes.

Of course, you know your baby and maybe you've already tried walking through it. If you haven't though, it might be worth a try.

[Juvysen]

My kids generally fussed for the first couple minutes (you know, during the first few months or something) when i put them in a carrier... so my first few minutes is often spent bouncing w/babe in the carrier, then they usually calm down/fall asleep and then i can go about my business... can you try that? Babes sometimes don't handle transitions well, at least that's all I think it is... they need to be parented through it. i don't view it as CIO because I'm there, holding them... though if it's more than a couple minutes (or the crying goes extreme - like they're in pain) I will take himm back out and try again later...

[MrsBone]

are you breastfeeding? If so, she could be sensitive to something you are consuming. For me it was caffeine. Even a small amount made my baby restless, and sleep deprived because he couldn't stay asleep for more than 45 minutes at a time. Do you drink caffeine? Other culprits could be spicy foods, dairy, wheat, nuts, eggs..there are too many to name!

[treespeak]

Hey Mama, couldn't read and not respond. My now almost three-year-old DS was a high-needs baby who needed to be bounced, rocked, and held all day long. By the time he was six weeks old I had not only burned off the baby weight, but was way under my pre-pregnancy weight from walking him all day long (Not healthy for me at all) We tried elimination diet, chiropractic, homeopathics, massage, you name it. Nothing changed the reality. Now that I know my son better, I realize that he was just a really sensitive kid. It freaked him out to be in a body--the sounds, the smells, the lights--he just needed a lot of support and closeness to work through it all. He's still sensitive, but now it looks like a bright, intuitive, compassionate toddler. If I could go back in time and tell my stressed out worried self a message from the future it would be: you are doing perfectly. Don't beat yourself up if your baby cries in your arms. Nothing lasts forever. When a thought comes into your head that causes you stress ("I should do something" "I'm not a good mom") question the thought, not what you are doing. Lots of love.

Ooops, and sorry for crashing your DDC--I saw this in new posts and didn't check the forum.

[Deir]

Originally Posted by treespeak

Hey Mama, couldn't read and not respond. My now almost three-year-old DS was a high-needs baby who needed to be bounced, rocked, and held all day long. By the time he was six weeks old I had not only burned off the baby weight, but was way under my pre-pregnancy weight from walking him all day long (Not healthy for me at all) We tried elimination diet, chiropractic, homeopathics, massage, you name it. Nothing changed the reality. Now that I know my son better, I realize that he was just a really sensitive kid. It freaked him out to be in a body--the sounds, the smells, the lights--he just needed a lot of support and closeness to work through it all. He's still sensitive, but now it looks like a bright, intuitive, compassionate toddler. If I could go back in time and tell my stressed out worried self a message from the future it would be: you are doing perfectly. Don't beat yourself up if your baby cries in your arms. Nothing lasts forever. When a thought comes into your head that causes you stress ("I should do something" "I'm not a good mom") question the thought, not what you are doing. Lots of love.

Ooops, and sorry for crashing your DDC--I saw this in new posts and didn't check the forum.

[Plummeting]

I was also thinking about you saying that your babe is 6 weeks and it's getting worse instead of better. Don't worry - that's totally normal! They usually tend to get fussier and fussier until 6 weeks or so, then it slowly gets better. It would be totally within the range of normal for your baby to get worse for another week or two, then slowly start to get less fussy.

[lizsky]

Thanks for the ideas! I tried the sling again today and allowed her to fuss a little longer in it- one time she settled for a 30 min nap, but the other time her screaming escalated and I had to take her out. Although I'm realizing that part of the problem may be the sling, but thats a separate post.

I guess maybe 6 weeks is just a fussy age? I'm also realizing that it may feel even more challenging because my mom was helping a lot at the beginning and several friends were bringing meals but that has pretty much all fizzled out. But I have a friend coming by tomorrow, and I'm planning to take a long shower while she's here so that should be a boost to my morale!

[Right of Passage]

6 weeks is a growth spurt! So it's typical to fuss and want to nurse and your attention 24/7 hang in there maam!

[Deir]

Here's my tips- Put the vent fan on your oven on high when you are putting her in the carrier
Also- Nora FELL ASLEEP in her bouncy seat yesterday to the sound of the vacuum
white noise is our ticket!

[Juvysen]

can you nurse her *in* the sling? that way maybe she'll get the idea that this is a GOOD place to be...

I agree with the white noise - another white noise maker? your radio - put it on a station that doesn't have a broadcast (i.e. one that's just static) and turn it up as loud as she is crying, then as she gets settled down turn it down.... The hairdryer (not aimed at baby!!) is another good noisemaker. I also wanna recommend "the happiest baby on the block" video if you haven't seen it yet. It was such a lifesaver when DD hit her fussy stage! It's also pretty AP compatible, imo.

[Snapdragon]

omg my 5 wk old baby has become like this too- he is crying all the #$%$ time unless he is in the sling. sigh. And my body is still so sore from the c section and my back is seized up. this is not fun
Maybe it is something I am eating?

[Plummeting]

Okay, as someone who has now had two babies who are sensitive to foods in my diet, I am not at all one to poo-poo the idea that a baby might be sensitive to something mom is eating. However, I do think it's important to point out that babies are just fussy sometimes and it is not healthy to agonize over everything you eat wondering if maybe it's hurting your baby. Most babies do not require their moms to limit their diets much, if at all. It's easy to drive yourself absolutely crazy if, every time your baby gets fussy, you rack your brain trying to remember everything you've eaten in the last day or two and trying to pin the blame on some food or another. I know because I've done it!

If you want to try eliminating something, the first thing to cut out is always dairy, and you need to cut out ALL dairy, including "hidden" dairy. And it takes a few weeks. If that helps a little, but there still seems to be something wrong, then try cutting out soy as well, since quite a few babies sensitive to one are sensitive to the other. If doing that doesn't work, you can continue looking, but honestly, if your baby isn't having other symptoms - eczema, diaper rashes, reflux, consistently green or mucousy poo - it's probably not a reaction to something in your diet.

Babies fuss sometimes, and it's really, really hard on us when our babies are fussy and we want to make them feel better from whatever has them so upset. However, we can't always do that, and it's important to remember that! It's not our fault, and no matter how bad it makes us feel, it's STILL not our fault.

[Deir]

Originally Posted by Plummeting

Okay, as someone who has now had two babies who are sensitive to foods in my diet, I am not at all one to poo-poo the idea that a baby might be sensitive to something mom is eating. However, I do think it's important to point out that babies are just fussy sometimes and it is not healthy to agonize over everything you eat wondering if maybe it's hurting your baby. Most babies do not require their moms to limit their diets much, if at all. It's easy to drive yourself absolutely crazy if, every time your baby gets fussy, you rack your brain trying to remember everything you've eaten in the last day or two and trying to pin the blame on some food or another. I know because I've done it!

If you want to try eliminating something, the first thing to cut out is always dairy, and you need to cut out ALL dairy, including "hidden" dairy. And it takes a few weeks. If that helps a little, but there still seems to be something wrong, then try cutting out soy as well, since quite a few babies sensitive to one are sensitive to the other. If doing that doesn't work, you can continue looking, but honestly, if your baby isn't having other symptoms - eczema, diaper rashes, reflux, consistently green or mucousy poo - it's probably not a reaction to something in your diet.

Babies fuss sometimes, and it's really, really hard on us when our babies are fussy and we want to make them feel better from whatever has them so upset. However, we can't always do that, and it's important to remember that! It's not our fault, and no matter how bad it makes us feel, it's STILL not our fault.

I concur! It can driveyou crazy!!Also- some babies can't tolerate ANY dairy- most can tolerate some.

[Snapdragon]

so