Would this upset you?

[peaceful_mama]

I've known for about two months that I had a choice of two dates for DS to go to a kindergarten-orientation morning at his new school. (half the 'new' kids go each day, they do some activities with this year's class while the parents go to a meeting. A chance for the kids to see kindergarten, get to know some of the other kids, and meet the teacher.)

I talked to his preschool teacher a few times, mentioned the two dates. She's never said anything about it other than that was fine that he miss school for that. (both my options were on preschool days.)

So fine, I tell 'new school' I don't care which day, just put us down for one. I could have stated an absolute preference anytime before probably last Wed. and gotten it honored, no questions asked.

I got my assignment in the mail last Friday, for next week.

I found out THIS MORNING that next Wed. DS's class is going on a field trip. Involving a BUS. (DS *begs* to ride the bus, so that alone would be fun to him.)
But the second point is I know full well if they were budgeting to use a bus and planning for that, they've known for probably at LEAST a few weeks there was at least *some* possibility this trip was going to be this particular day.

So WHY WHY did someone not say to me even "Hey we MIGHT be going on a field trip on the 28th..." so that I could choose the other day while I still had a chance?

(I did call the kindergarten school and ask them if there was *any* possibility I could switch and why, she said "Well, I will check..." but she didn't sound very hopeful that it would work. And I get it. Half the class is 13 kids and they are there with the full class of 26---plus 3 parent volunteers. But I get where it's already going to be a crazy, unusual day, it would be even more so if you ended up with even just a couple extra 'switchers'.)

Anyway, would it upset you that nobody could be bothered to mention even a *possible* conflict? Would you say something to the preschool? Because I know that they will be talking a lot about the trip in the classroom and it's to a garden center--they are going to bring back plants and do lots of stuff wiht planting. So he is going to be hearing all about it before and after.

[Tigerchild]

It would annoy me, but I would set aside the annoyance/anger quickly. It would have been nice to let you know, though I don't think it would be out of the realm of possibility that they didn't really know until recently either. Will this take up the entire day, or just part? Maybe you can take your kiddo to pick out a plant after the event, or if it's still going on you guys can meet up with the class.

I guess I would not sweat this one too much. What if your DS was sick that day? My kids have been disappointed at missing cool field trips because of illness or scheduling conflicts, they got over it quickly.

For me personally this type of thing is not what I spend much energy on. I could get myself all worked up about "unfair" or whatever--but all that does is make me feel bad, and it still doesn't change reality.

I do not think it's unreasonable for you to be annoyed, and it's frustration-eyeroll worthy, I agree. But I wouldn't let it ruin your day, and if you do something special with DS afterwards, maybe it will take away some of the disappointment, even if you can't ride the bus (which I get, is totally cool. Any chance you can park at a park-n-ride and go on a little city bus ride?)

[peaceful_mama]

possibly yeah. I just think it sucks that he is probably going to miss the field trip that they'll be talking about when they are doing their growing projects in class the rest of the year. (school ends the 14th of May)

I think it is especially annoying to me because I got a note *last week* about some "fun in the sun' day that I think the district is doing one evening to kind of celebrate the end of the school year and another event that is at his school the same week...the first week in May.
SO they can get notes out about this stuff 3 weeks in advance, but I get a week's notice of this trip?

yeah I agree in the end it's probably worth an eyeroll and honestly I think the less DS hears anyone make a big deal out of it, the less he will remember "missing" it because of "getting to go to the kindergarten school."

And if it was a one-day thing at his "new school" I would not be annoyed. They really can't schedule everything to be perfect for everyone.

[eepster]

If it were something you just mentioned really quickly when picking him up, I would not really be upset with the school, but if you went into the office or specifically pulled someone aside to ask I'd be pretty annoyed.

At DS's school they issue a calendar at the beginning of the year to all the parents. It has everything except snackdays on it. The calendars with snackdays are issued at the beginning of the month.

If the kindergarten can't switch your day, I would probably let him let im do the field trip while you go to the orientation. I doubt that spending a half day months before he actually will go to K is going to have a great impact on his future K experience, but missing the big field trip will be something he might remember for a long time.

[Kirsten]

Yes, it would annoy me. I agree with you that if you don't let him see you get upset over it, he will get over it quicker. Hopefully you can switch to the other kindergarten orientation but if not, he will have other chances to ride a bus. I do understand your annoyance about this for sure though!!

[Kirsten]

Originally Posted by eepster

If the kindergarten can't switch your day, I would probably let him let im do the field trip while you go to the orientation. I doubt that spending a half day months before he actually will go to K is going to have a great impact on his future K experience, but missing the big field trip will be something he might remember for a long time.

Oh I HEARTILY disagree!!!!!!!! The kindergarten orientation is a hundred times more important than one field trip (out of ten they take in a school year). YOU can take him on a bus. YOU can take him to the nursery. YOU can let him choose some new plants and put them in beds at your house. But this may be his only chance to participate in his future kindergarten class. This seemingly simple thing may be very important to his comfort level on that first day of school. And to me, the most important part of kindergarten is my child learning that elementary is FUN and a place they want to be! I wouldn't skip my child's chance at orientation for a field trip.

[peaceful_mama]

well actually his preschool has taken a grand total of 3 trips this year, including this upcoming one.

I agree with Kristen, for my child, I think it will be a big deal to meet his teacher and already know some of the kids before the first day. Also, this is a small school with high parent-involvement and when I was given the tour, I was also told it's common for parents to schedule summer playdates so that they'll know somebody a little better in K. I am going to go out on a limb here and say this happens with particular kids who sort of click on the play-day in the room.

He's a sort of slow-to-warm child (getting less so with age) who is going from being at the same school with the same teachers and many of the same classmates for two years to full-day kindergarten, with many more kids in his class. *And* the added change of going to separate classrooms and having different teachers for 'library time' art, PE, and music without his regular classroom teacher.
I think he needs the orientation. And I think 'getting to' do it will take a bit of the sting out of missing the trip if that is what happens.

I think I'm just especially ticked because the note that came home today said they'll be doing planting projects and stuff the rest of the year based on this trip. So....it's not like when they went to the apple orchard and they did maybe some talking about it before they went and some tasting of apples the next day and then it was pretty much done.

That said, I'm sure his teacher will get him a plant to grow. And that will help too. He's the type though who will probably be ticked about missing out--a couple of years ago, he wouldn't have cared. Now he will.

[eepster]

I didn't realize that this would be one of 4 field trips. I thought this was going to be the only field trip for the whole year. I'm surprised they organize so many field trips. I'm even more suprised by Kirsten's school doing 10.

[peaceful_mama]

Three, total.

One was to the science museum, which I went along to and he *loved* so we have been back for almost every "Free first Friday" since.

One was a walking trip to the fire station a few blocks away.

And this one. This is the only one they've done with an ongoing project attached. That's the main reason why I'm sad he might miss it, and I think it might be a bigger deal to him that he missed it, because it will be talked about more I think.

Oh and it's also his *last* trip with his class of 2 years...which might be a bigger issue to me than it is to him.

We can't meet up with them later or anything like that, they are literally happening at the same time.

And I don't think they'd let us tag along with the afternoon class or that the experience would be the same for him if they did....I thought about asking for that. And i still might I don't know it depends on just how much he cares about 'missing' it.

And I still don't know for sure that he *will* miss it...but the secretary at his tiny new school did not sound hopeful that they would switch his day at this point.

[Tigerle]

If it is such a tiny school community it would really impress me if the secretary were willing to send out an email or make a few phone calls to find someone who was willing to swap the date of the K orientation with you - there must be others who don't mind which day they'll come, like you wouldn't have minded until this morning. Or do you happen to know anyone? Who might then know someone else etc...
And to answer your question, yes, I'd be majorly ticked off.

[CarrieMF]

I wouldn't be bothered by it. Disappointed he was missing the field trip but other than that stuff happens.

There will only be 2.5 weeks of school left after this field trip, it isn't going to destroy him to have to miss the trip or to hear about the trip from the other kids. He'll get to tell them what he did in K that day.

I highly doubt he's the only kid missing it that day too.

[peaceful_mama]

It's not so much him missing it that bugs me as the REASON he might have missed it.

In the end, happy news! I called "new school" this PM and the K teacher had to make a couple other last minute changes anyway the secretary said and so she switched me too

Which is *fabulous* because DS said today "but I don't WANT TO miss riding the bus!"

So happy ending.

[Tigerle]

[ecoteat]

Great!

As far as notifying parents goes, when I send home permission slips to my students for field trips, I don't do it much earlier than a week before unless it's something really big because it actually gets harder to track down all the forms and it seems to help parents remember if they need to send their kid with anything special that day. If they go home too far in advance, families are more likely to forget important details or misplace the permission slip. For events that happen after school, though, we let families know about them as soon as they are on the calendar because we don't need anything from them in return. Once they know about it, whether they come or not and how they prepare for it is their own responsibility. But field trips are different.

[Kirsten]

Glad it works out for him to do both.

I'm surprised that some schools do only 1-3 field trips per year. I have three kids who have been in a variety of preschools, public schools and a private school. Every one of them did field trips once a month average. Maybe it is regional?

[ASusan]

Yay that it worked out.

I don't think our preschool/daycare does any trips. Preschool teachers walk the kids through the fields and town park that are attached to the building. That's a field trip. The toddlers get put in a buggy and wheeled 1/2 mile to an antique train engine that they can look at. And then wheeled back.

[peaceful_mama]

Well a big part of our "only" 2-3 per yr. trips is the winter---the weather here is pretty much too unpredictable from about mid-Nov. probably on through I'd say beginning of April to really schedule anything--especially for preschoolers, who I think we're all a little more protective of...

Also another reason DS's school had 3 was they could walk to one, the fire station just a few blocks from school. Other schools in town can't walk places, they just are not close enough.