Helping with going to school in the fall.

[p1gg1e]

Hi! I'm the mom to a 5.5yo DD she will be 6 in July. She is extremely shy. We have tried preschool when she was 4. She lasted one month with huge breakdowns and anger at me ( things we had never seen before from her) and DH. We tried a local home schooling co-op then later that spring. She would only stay in Gym class ( that was fine , I just asked her to try the other classes). Then we tried the homeschooling group again this last fall and she would not even stay in gym ( with me there in the room or out) we gave it one month and pulled her ( refused to go , tantrums , anger towards me.).

My DH is really shy he was voted the shyest in his class. I'm an introvert so she is allot like both of us.

Ive told DD that we are going to the school to meet the teachers and do some fun stuff to show them all the things she knows for Kindy. She has told me " well I'm just not looking foward to it ( school)." tonight she is crying to sleep saying she is scared to go because she is shy ( her words) .

Tips? tricks to help her settle in? Ive tried to show her where the school is , talk about art and playdoh ( she can't do that at home because of YDD) . making friends.

Does it have to be this hard? I feel bad pushing her for months if I have to to get her to stay in something she feels so scared about. I have asked her though that I want her to try ( mostly because DH will not let me homeschool.) just like I asked her when she went to the other groups.

ok sorry this was so long I just need to find some tools for this

[peaceful_mama]

Does she like one-on-one playdates? She might feel better with a friend or two she knows if you can arrange it.

I think once she gets into the routine and there's stuff she loves, she'll do fine. But there *will* be an adjustment. And if you're not committed to homeschooling, she will have to get used to it...I think she will. It might take even more than a month for "stress-related-change" behavior to go back to normal?
but I think she *will* adjust and learn to like it.

And your teacher is key...you've got to have someone who understands and is willing to work with her and help her find activities she likes and kids who may become her friends. Someone who will take the time to get to know her and help her adjust, not dismiss this as a "problem" caused by lack of socialization, a behavior she should outgrow, etc. etc.

I think with those things, she WILL adjust. good luck

[p1gg1e]

Originally Posted by peaceful_mama

Does she like one-on-one playdates? She might feel better with a friend or two she knows if you can arrange it.

I think once she gets into the routine and there's stuff she loves, she'll do fine. But there *will* be an adjustment. And if you're not committed to homeschooling, she will have to get used to it...I think she will. It might take even more than a month for "stress-related-change" behavior to go back to normal?
but I think she *will* adjust and learn to like it.

And your teacher is key...you've got to have someone who understands and is willing to work with her and help her find activities she likes and kids who may become her friends. Someone who will take the time to get to know her and help her adjust, not dismiss this as a "problem" caused by lack of socialization, a behavior she should outgrow, etc. etc.

I think with those things, she WILL adjust. good luck

She does play well with other kids. I'm having trouble finding kids that are not overbearing personalities..( not sure another way to put it) We tried another play group today none of the kids will be in her class but one will be in 1st at her school. She was upset about it later though. I will say though the little girl in the group was picking on her and I tried not to get to involved unless it was physical or she asked me too. This though tends to be a consistent issue. She gets pushed around easy because she is easy going and quiet.we do allot of talking through her fears.

Ugh Id actually prefer to homeschool and so would she but DH is 100% for public school and won't talk about it for the most part so here we are. I was thinking K-12 would be a good middle ground but he backed out of that.

We are still in negotiations...