Why does minimalism scare people?

[Tradd]

As I'm peeling back another layer of the onion, I've been pondering this question. And I really can't come up with an answer. The people I've personally encountered who've encountered my minimalism (either by seeing my apartment or seeing pics I've posted online of my place) who are threatened by it are not packrats or hoarders. Just typical middle-class folks who have a typical amount of stuff.

One woman who saw my pics even told me I needed psychiatric help!

Hah! Less stuff means I can concentrate on what's important to me, plus I like seeing empty space!

Any ideas? For other minimalists, what have your experiences been?

[catscharm74]

Maybe they feel judged or guilty? I think most people just don't get the why's, which can be numerous and varied, depending on the person.

My family does not understand the way I live...they think I am too controlling or crazy when in fact I am quiet relaxed, VERY happy and able to do exactly what I want in life. I live in the now, not the past or prepping for the future that is uncertain at best. I work in a preppy mainstream job that has me surrounded by constant one upping and materialism. I have found being me, I don't get mucked down in the competition and have more genuine relationships.

[rere]

I am not a minimalist but have had strange reactions to other lifestyle choices.I had a woman get up and leave a conversation and then keep her kids away from my daughter because she doesn't go to school.I really struggled to understand her reaction.

I think sometimes when we make choices that are so different from others it can start to chip away at some peoples foundations.Especially if our choice is working.So we have to be "crazy"so their foundation can stay strong.

p.s.Can we see your minimalist home?I'd love some decluttering inspiration!

[crunchy_mommy]

Ditto to that, I would love to see pictures of your home if you're willing to share!!

I wonder if it's just empty space that scares people? I know when I see an empty corner in our house I feel compelled to put something there. Or maybe they wonder how you function, what you do with your time, etc. if you don't have 'things'?

[philomom]

For me.. I like things uncluttered. But that doesn't mean I don't have some books and some plants. I just don't have lots of knickknacks. I do have a lot of art on the walls.


When things are very minimal, I feel like I can't make a mess or put my feet up. I also start to think that the very minimal person is not "at home" much.

[EarthyMamaofDaisy]

I'm noticing it's so much easier to keep my house clean with less stuff. And the kids are having an easier time picking up their toys. And the laundry isn't getting all backed up the way it used to. As I've decluttered I've noticed that most of the stuff is items that people have gifted us. I'm wishing I could find a nice way to tell people to stop buying us stuff.

[mommajb]

The first thing I did after reading your post was look around to see if I could find a link to your blog. I photos of minimalism and am always decluttering but can't quite cut through to have a level of stuff I find peaceful.

[Tradd]

Originally Posted by mommajb

The first thing I did after reading your post was look around to see if I could find a link to your blog. I photos of minimalism and am always decluttering but can't quite cut through to have a level of stuff I find peaceful.

1. I don't have a blog.

2. I don't have any current pictures to share.

I do have color in my place, it's not stark white, and I've got seating for guests and a few pictures on the walls.

[Tradd]

Originally Posted by crunchy_mommy

Or maybe they wonder how you function, what you do with your time, etc. if you don't have 'things'?

Well, no TV, and that *really* confuses people. I read, write, listen to the radio and music, cook. I'm taking classes, have a heavy load of church involvement, including being president of two organizations, one regional and one in my congregation.

I have a Kindle, so a lot of books are on there! An eReader is a minimalist's dream!

[justmama]

well we have a tv but otherwise your house sounds lik emine. I don't get the "problem." Maybe it's that we don't try to "keep up with the joneses?" Maybe that makes us freaks? I don't know. But apparently anything you do out of the norm scares people. Homeschooling, breastfeeding, babywearing, not vaxing, etc. That is SCARY to some people. Not having debt is extremely frightening to some people. I don't understand why it's a bad thing but apparently it is.

[annethcz]

I don't find minimalism scary, but I will admit that sometimes when I see pics of minimalist homes, it looks too stark and cold and barren to me.

That said, I *know* I have too much stuff and I wish I had the energy and the fortitude to get rid of things I don't need or use.

[zoebird]

i think that for some people, minimalism reads as limitations rather than liberation. and those limitations, then, read as a "holier than thou" attitude from those who are minimalists.

this is not without reason--in our western consciousness, the process of giving up materiality for spirituality is deeply ingrained, and it is ingrained also with the idea that giving something up is a sacrifice, rather than an offering.

the reality is that for those who are actively choosing minimalism (or anything that seems to have a limit on materiality such as veganism, etc), I find that the process is actually liberating.

of course, there is minimalism--how an individual defines and utilizes that and the term 'simplicity' which also varies--and then there is also the issue of design-style minimalism.

design minimalism is often "stark" and "empty." not a lot of people respond to it because--as the above posters mentioned--there is a sense of not being able to relax in that space.

[HappilyEvrAfter]

Originally Posted by zoebird

i think that for some people, minimalism reads as limitations rather than liberation. and those limitations, then, read as a "holier than thou" attitude from those who are minimalists.

this is not without reason--in our western consciousness, the process of giving up materiality for spirituality is deeply ingrained, and it is ingrained also with the idea that giving something up is a sacrifice, rather than an offering.

I like the whole post from zoebird, but this seems to be the part I run into the most.

My walls are pretty much bare...except one or two that I strategically use to put up family pictures.
My living room has a couch, a TV stand and a TV. I have one bedroom that's empty. My dining room has a table with two chairs.
The bedroom has a bed and one night table.
My son's room is, by far, the fullest room in the house.

It feels freeing for me to be without all that "clutter" that others seem to feel obligated to have.

I like the empty wall space in my home becuase I feel overwhelmed when I look at a wall full of pictures. Those walls make me feel constantly outwardly engaged and the introvert in me likes to feel like I don't have to be constatnly pulled out.

Hmmm, I think that might be the key. Are you and introvert? I don't know many minimalist extroverts.
Decorating is used to first pull you out and then to pull you in. Since most of the world is extroverted, they want to be pulled "into" something.
Introverts seem to be ok with not having to engage...which minimalism seems to perpetuate. It screams "inner engagement".
That might be what scares people...it makes them feel like you don't want to pull them in.
Just a theory.

[wife&mommy]

Well maybe its not scary but just unknown, so different from what they know and live that they react to it that way.

[JamieCatheryn]

The wall space part really gets to people. I've had children ask me if I was about to move because all my pictures must be packed (most of my walls have one thing on each, many have nothing). For us not having knick knacks on every surface is more a childproofing thing but it's strange to people too.

[Tradd]

Originally Posted by HappilyEvrAfter

My walls are pretty much bare...except one or two that I strategically use to put up family pictures.
My living room has a couch, a TV stand and a TV. I have one bedroom that's empty. My dining room has a table with two chairs.
The bedroom has a bed and one night table.
My son's room is, by far, the fullest room in the house.

It feels freeing for me to be without all that "clutter" that others seem to feel obligated to have.

I like the empty wall space in my home becuase I feel overwhelmed when I look at a wall full of pictures. Those walls make me feel constantly outwardly engaged and the introvert in me likes to feel like I don't have to be constatnly pulled out.

Hmmm, I think that might be the key. Are you and introvert? I don't know many minimalist extroverts.
Decorating is used to first pull you out and then to pull you in. Since most of the world is extroverted, they want to be pulled "into" something.
Introverts seem to be ok with not having to engage...which minimalism seems to perpetuate. It screams "inner engagement".
That might be what scares people...it makes them feel like you don't want to pull them in.
Just a theory.

Extrovert in a major way. I have no problem talking to people I don't know at all. But I also like being by myself and know how to be alone sometimes. Maybe that's what drives people nuts.

[velochic]

We are minimalists and we have always had really positive reactions from people. My tables have nothing on them, my walls are mostly empty, we have no clutter. Our house is older (70 years old) but with the hardwood floors, white walls and minimal decor, most people make comments like "Nice house!". It's not large or particularly impressive, but I'm a neat freak and don't like clutter (plus I have an only child, who is also neat, and a dh that is the *ultimate* minimalist), so it makes the house look larger and brighter. This is the first I've ever heard of it "scaring" people.

[HappilyEvrAfter]

Originally Posted by Tradd

Extrovert in a major way. I have no problem talking to people I don't know at all. But I also like being by myself and know how to be alone sometimes. Maybe that's what drives people nuts.

Have you ever happened to take the Myers Briggs test? I can seem like an extrovert to people (no prob talking to new people, can be the life of the party, etc) but I'm 99% introvert.
Maybe you're on the border of each, but if you tend to like having time to recharge with quiet time and enjoy time to yourself more that others then I'd happenstance to say you have some introvert in ya.

And, really, it may just drive people nuts because it's such an extreme from who they think you are. Which is what I run into when people really start spending time with me and realize my extorvertism is really just my outside persona.

Sorry, to get all thereputical.

Or it could be none of my theory at all! LOL!!

[lmbjer]

My mother panics each time I tell her I have reduced even more!

She is a "collector" though.

I was admired by family and friends until I reduced my children's toys. They were in shock. How could I take toys from them?! They need them all!

I tried to explain how they actually played better without so many toys. They are more active and use their imagination and play with everything. But still I was treated like I was depriving them of life.

That infuriated me.

Grrrr.....too bad for them. But there is a reason I can clean my whole house in under an hour and they can't.

[zoebird]

fwiw, i haven't come across a lot of negativity for minimalism, but that's largely because people don't see what we are doing as minimalism. they see it as new people who have moved here and own nothing. so, it's not scary. it's common. LOL

i want an e-reader, but DH is all about the books themselves. i understand, i love books too, but i am a minimalist. i love having an IPod instead of CDs. before the time of ipods, i would just listen to the radio, rather than get cds. LOL i think i came to our relationship with less than 20 Cds total, and most of them were gifts from others. dh is against the E-reader. oh well. LOL