Weekly Post-Partum thread, April 25-May 2 - Page 8

[smeisnotapirate]

rhi, that "getting stuff done" balance is SO hard. Honestly, I just started finding a rhythm when we had this baby. I think one of the wisest things anyone ever said to me was a friend who said "Will it be there when you get back? Yes? Then it's not worth stressing about." They're only so small for so long, and though it can get tiring, nursing and cuddling them is such an important thing that oftentimes, the dishes wait, the laundry waits, and (in my case) work waits.

I just learned 2 newborn carries in my woven wrap. I can't believe I didn't have one of these with DS!

Ginger, I think you're right - I started off on the right foot with an amazing, peaceful birth, so it set us up for success. I hope it continues.

[ivymae]

gah, when my milk lets down (3097636 times a day) it still hurts SO bad. It's a WHOOSH feeling, and then painpainpain and then 30 seconds later it's fine, but it's all the way from my armpits to my nipples. Youch, I don't remember it being this extreme with the older girls.

[sew_crafty_girl]

Yikes Ivory. I haven't experienced pain with letdown. I certainly feel it, but it's like mild pins and needles.

My hands are getting so dry from all the handwashing after diaper changes and hand dishwashing I'm actually getting accomplished each day.

[SuzieQ3417]

So I officially survived my first flight with the baby. He slept through the entire experience (which I consider to be a bonus for both myself and fellow passengers). Seriously...slept through the TSA screening (including lifting him out and putting him back into carseat), slept while waiting at the gate for 2 hours, woke briefly for a bottle during takeoff, woke briefly for a bottle upon landing, and then slept for the car ride home. I'd been terrified this entire week leading up to this experience, but he was a total champ!

I was worried he wouldn't sleep at night once we got to our destination, but nope...proved me wrong again by sleeping for 6 hours straight. Yes, you heard me right. Did I somehow have my baby swapped out with someone elses? He's been nothing but an angel the past few days, aside from wanting to be held a lot (but that seems pretty standard for a newborn and I am most happy to oblige!). I feel like he must be storing up for something big, and we will all suffer the consequences when it happens. haha

[crazyeight]

Originally Posted by ivymae

gah, when my milk lets down (3097636 times a day) it still hurts SO bad. It's a WHOOSH feeling, and then painpainpain and then 30 seconds later it's fine, but it's all the way from my armpits to my nipples. Youch, I don't remember it being this extreme with the older girls.

i have the pain too. also doesn't last a long time but still hurts! i try to hold myself tight if not in public and the counterpressure helps a TON. bf keeps looking at me weird when i'm holding myself

great job on the flight suzie. sure could have gone worse but glad you got through it unscathed

Reeve slept for 4 HOURS for his nap! and didn't need to be soothed ONCE! omg. i got so much done! cleaned kids room, folded the 394932 loads of laundry and did bf's laundry, vacumed and had time to eat lunch by myself!

[finn'smama]

ivy, my letdown definitely seems stronger this time, and sometimes it is almost painful.

as for getting things done, i forgot how hard that was with a newb, i forgot how much time is spent sitting on the couch nursing or holding a sleeping baby brcause they wake up two minutes after you set them down! made for an interesting day today because i had the bright idea to have a bday party for my 5yo so the house had to be cleaned...yikes! henry was not impressed with amount of times i tried to set him in his bouncy chair.

cloth dipes aren't happening here either, and you know what, i don't care! i will do it when u feel more organized...

[Dena]

Originally Posted by ivymae

Getting things.. done? What is this "done" you speak of?

Really, make peace with the chaos right now, because the guilt of not getting things done is killer if you let it in. After three kids, I am more efficient with my time (I can load the dishwasher in 15 seconds i think), but more often then not i walk away in the middle of cleaning the tub/folding laundry/making a sandwich, and by the time I come back I may as well just start over. This is where i am ridiculously lucky that my husband is able to ignore the mess, or will do the cleaning for me, because i can't imagine if he gave me grief for it.

This exactly. It used to bug me, but I am learning to live with the clutter and utter disorganization. It helps knowing I am not alone, though.

Rhi, if it helps, I have given up on cloth completely with the twins. And dd2 for that matter. I just spent a small fortune on Seventh Gen. diapers and training pants on Amazon. I just can't imagine adding the laundry of three diaper wearers to what we are already doing. I decided the stress would not be worth it, and the extra work would likely affect my breast milk supply - I have found my supply is easily influenced by stress and overwork - and that I would rather buy diapers than formula, given the choice.

Originally Posted by GreenTeaGinger61

My other dd is driving me crazy though. She has done nothing but sob since the baby got here. EVERY little thing becomes a huge drama issue where she ends up in her room sobbing.

This sounds a lot like my oldest right now. The least little thing causes a descent into tears and sobbing. I am not handling it well either, between sleep deprivation and the fact that I usually have a very low tolerance for drama. I think in our case part of the problem is that, as the oldest, she is also the easiest, and takes the least amount of attention right now - she doesn't need diaper changes, she can dress and bathe herself, etc. So the drama gets her some attention. I am trying to pay attention to her when she is NOT melting down. Hopefully it will help.

Originally Posted by ivymae

gah, when my milk lets down (3097636 times a day) it still hurts SO bad. It's a WHOOSH feeling, and then painpainpain and then 30 seconds later it's fine, but it's all the way from my armpits to my nipples. Youch, I don't remember it being this extreme with the older girls.

I am getting some pain with let down this time around too - I felt it with dd1 briefly, but none with dd2. Odd.

Originally Posted by SuzieQ3417

So I officially survived my first flight with the baby.

afm Maya had such gas last night. Poor thing - I think she screamed for almost an hour, with me trying to burp her, pump her legs, rub her tummy, etc. I would find something that worked for a minute, and then she would start up again. I felt so bad for her, because she was clearly in pain. She finally fell asleep around midnight. However, when I next opened my eyes to hungry babies, it was five a.m.! Yes, I got five straight hours of sleep. Nice. But boy were they hungry! In fact, they tanked up so much they did little more than snack all morning.

Today was errand day for us too - the neighborhood plant exchange in the morning, and Trader Joe's and Target in the afternoon. All while wearing the babies. I am totally sore, but it was fun to get out with the family.

Now we are having yummy gyros from the local Greek restaurant for dinner - courtesy of our friend who gave us a gc to the restaurant!

[Amandamanda]

Originally Posted by ivymae

gah, when my milk lets down (3097636 times a day) it still hurts SO bad. It's a WHOOSH feeling, and then painpainpain and then 30 seconds later it's fine, but it's all the way from my armpits to my nipples. Youch, I don't remember it being this extreme with the older girls.

UGH ME TOO, and I'm 2 months out! I keep waiting for it to get better but it doesn't.

Originally Posted by rhiOrion

Just went to Claire's thread in PAL, and her facebook friends say she's doing okay. Whew. I was worried.

oh good, i was wondering about her too.

Originally Posted by sehbub

I finally get to join this side!

CONGRATS!!!!!

Originally Posted by jenfl

Okay, so it's been a month, and breastfeeding is going badly enough that I finally decided that I'm willing to drive 2.5 hours to see a doctor who diagnoses and treats tongue tie.

s jen, i'm so sorry, and that sucks about that doc. was it his normal pediatrician or a completely different one? do you have to go to that one?


AFM, can somebody please remind me how long 2 month olds are supposed to sleep for? It seems like Adam still spends the majority of his day snoozing away. He has about 4-5 hours total during the day where he is awake (not counting nursing sessions), but otherwise he is asleep. We took him to his 2 month appointment (which was basically just nothing since we don't vax) and he appears to be perfectly healthy and is already at 11lbs 13oz (was 7lbs 4oz at birth) but of course I forget to ask if his sleepiness is normal! Other than that, he is a very calm and content little thing- he hardly ever cries at all. I feel very blessed for this, and I can sympathize with the mamas having a hard time, my dd2 was the most colicky baby you would have ever met, screamed her head off for 3-4 hours a night, didn't sleep through the night till close to 2 years old, etc. So I am feeling very lucky that at almost 9 weeks old we still have a very calm, albeit sleepy boy.

[justamama]

I've been gone since Wednesday and am far behind.

Jenfl- I can't believe they would charge a parent for coming to their newborn's appt! What is Sprout supposed to do, drive himself? :eyeroll

Rhi- Getting things done comes with time. You'll find your rhythm. We waiver between chaos and the house being spotless. It all depends on if Lucy is cranky, the big girls cooperative, my energy, etc. And if Dh has free time to help out!

Ivy- My letdowns are painful, too. And, apparently my breasts have psychic abilities. I letdown a minute or two before she even starts to stir.

Afm- After DH got home Wednesday morning, we decided on a whim to go to a cabin at a state park about 3.5 hrs away. It is in the middle of nowhere, and is so peaceful, so beautiful, and relaxing. Even with dd2 still getting over her tummy bug (which was likely mild roatvirus...today we have no puke! ), we had tons of fun. A looong hike on a converted railroad bridge over the river and marshy area. Playing games. Making s'mores. It was heavenly.

Lucy is doing well. Still battling overactive letdown. The past couple days I've made a conscious effort to take her off the breast and do nipple compression until the 'sprinkler effect' has passed. It's helped. She's getting bigger (I had to buy 0-3m onesies) but no clue on her weight. She's starting to give us smiles and respond to us. She's what you could call a fussy baby, but not horribly so. Of course dd1 was so fussy, teenagers should've been required to babysit her before deciding to have sex.

[justamama]

I've been gone since Wednesday and am far behind.

Jenfl- I can't believe they would charge a parent for coming to their newborn's appt! What is Sprout supposed to do, drive himself? :eyeroll

Rhi- Getting things done comes with time. You'll find your rhythm. We waiver between chaos and the house being spotless. It all depends on if Lucy is cranky, the big girls cooperative, my energy, etc. And if Dh has free time to help out!

Ivy- My letdowns are painful, too. And, apparently my breasts have psychic abilities. I letdown a minute or two before she even starts to stir.

Afm- After DH got home Wednesday morning, we decided on a whim to go to a cabin at a state park about 3.5 hrs away. It is in the middle of nowhere, and is so peaceful, so beautiful, and relaxing. Even with dd2 still getting over her tummy bug (which was likely mild roatvirus...today we have no puke! ), we had tons of fun. A looong hike on a converted railroad bridge over the river and marshy area. Playing games. Making s'mores. It was heavenly.

Lucy is doing well. Still battling overactive letdown. The past couple days I've made a conscious effort to take her off the breast and do nipple compression until the 'sprinkler effect' has passed. It's helped. She's getting bigger (I had to buy 0-3m onesies) but no clue on her weight. She's starting to give us smiles and respond to us. She's what you could call a fussy baby, but not horribly so. Of course dd1 was so fussy, teenagers should've been required to babysit her before deciding to have sex.

[jsh7809]

Seems like everyone is mostly getting into the swing of things to some extent, with lots of ups and downs - which is about how I feel about things here! We are doing well.. but I have lots and LOTS of moments throughout each day where I start going, "what on earth did I DO?! Our lives were great before and now I will never be able to read/ watch a movie/ sleep a solid 8 hours/ work/ think clearly again!!". But then the baby drifts off and I spend her naptime talking about her, reading the baby books (or mothering forums), looking at pictures or video of her (sick, I know!), or just gazing at her cuteness and being in love. So, right when I start worrying about myself and making it through one more second of this mama sh*t, I get to a point where it seems worth it again.
Or if not RIGHT then, pretty soon after
Last night I did have a sobbing freakout where I was like, I can't do this, I never know what she wants or needs, I am totally overwhelmed and I can never ever have a break! I usually get about one a day but this was a big one. Luckily DH was able to take her and soothe her (and me a bit) and I called yet another mom friend who was like, "yes, totally, this is normal and scary and overwhelming but totally totally normal and you are doing a good job." It's astounding how many times I need to hear every single day that I am not a failure and it is normal to feel this overwhelmed, that often even the babies don't know what they want so it's impossible for us to as well!
Every day gets a little better, though I still hit a wall of overwhelm and panic at having to do this forever (I know it won't be forever, she'll grow and change and I"ll adapt) a few times a day. I'm finding that I need to do some things for my sanity like let her fuss for a few minutes to see if she can settle down on her own and work it out (fuss, not scream and cry), whereas at first I was jumping up every time she made a sound. I am still holding and cuddling her a LOT but also taking lots of breaks when she'll go in her swing or bouncy chair or with DH. I am so blessed that she will sleep for a few long chunks of time a night (though that could change at any point!) and naps pretty well here and there... I'm still exhausted but most mornings and am able to wake up feeling happy to see her, and proud to be her mama.
It is totally overwhelming trying to integrate that realization a million times a day that as much as I can ask for a break here and there, no one else can give her the things she needs from her mother - milk and just cuddling and love - and right now that feels amazing and so powerful, but later in the day it feels exhausting and terrifying. All normal, or so they tell me
We are still struggling with my oversupply - someone else mentioned an overactive letdown and I think that may be what's going on! She wants to nurse all day long, which is tiring as it is, but because the milk sprinkler starts gushing all over herself and me, I have to use a cloth diaper tucked into my bra every single time and it is soaked within minutes. DD latches on but is instantly overwhelmed by my letdown, so I pop her off and try to catch a bunch of the milk in a storage bag! I've gotten up to 2 ounces this way, on the same boob that I'm feeding DD from, just by letting the milk dribble in in between her gulps. My hope is to get her to take a bottle here and there in the next few weeks since I will ultimately have to go back to work a few days here and there. Anyway, I think maybe I am getting better at letting a lot of the first milk dribble onto a cloth diaper (and into the storage bag!) and then letting DD suck on that same boob for as long as she wants - so that makes it a lot easier for me to pacify her with it, although we still both end up soaking wet and that is really frustrating. At least it's supposed to be hot this week! I'm hoping my supply and her needs will even out in the coming weeks.
She's 14 days old today (crazy!) but her umbilical cord stump is not quite off yet... it's so close and is driving me crazy!! DH and I are both resisting the urge to just noodge it off, but it's getting goop all over all her onesies (not seepage or pus, just regular old whatever-it-is from underneath the cord stump). I can't wait to get a little bathtime together when it's off. How long should we wait after it's come off (for the little belly button to heal)?
Hope everyone is getting some beautiful weather and chances to enjoy the outside world! DD and I went on our own (!) for our first trip out of the house yesterday, to whole foods. It was totally exhausting and I almost cried when they had no bacon at the hot bar but today I think we're going to go to a friend's "baby party" at the park and see some other moms and babies. I do find that getting out of the house seems to help.
DH goes back to work tomorrow, I am trying not to worry and be sad

[smeisnotapirate]

Jess, . So, so normal! Glad it seems like there are more ups than downs.

I'm dealing with oversupply as well - it was pretty crippling with DS, but DD seems to be doing fine. I've found that I'm much more successful with nurse, burp, nurse, burp, repeat ad nauseum. It's also good latch practice for DD.

Holy crap. DD. That's so cool.

The flood of pink has begun. DH is beside himself - he can't say no because they are all gifts and even HE has to admit the clothes are just darling, but he hate hate hates pink. Every time someone gets DD something that's purple or teal or green, he thanks the person profusely. It's almost embarassing.

[justamama]

Jess- I'm so glad you're finding your rhythm! Oversupply sucks. In the first few days my milk was in, I would hold a bottle to the breast we weren't nursing on...I would fill or almost fill a 4oz bottle! It's slowed quite a bit, but letdown still overwhelms her.

Sara- I'm not a pink fan either (darker pinks, yes, but baby pink is in small doses only!), so I totally.get where your DH is coming from! You'd think by the third girl people would remember that I'm pretty adament about baby pink making me nauseous. But noooo...so o graciously accept their gifts, and thank my lucky stars that our family buys just theory current size. Which means no matter what, they'll outgrow it soon enough!

Afm- I did go on a shopping spree today! I got new undies, a lens and adapter for my camera, 4 t-shirts, fabric to put under the neckline of the t-shirts so they aren't so low cut, a toaster, curtains for the kitchen, and other kitchen supplies. I'm moat excited about the t-shirts and undies.

Lucy has been so cuddly today! I needed that. I'm battling insomnia and by the time I get to sleep, I'm being woken up to latch LuLu on every 1-2 hrs. Then the girls get up early in the mornings. Yay.

Oh, I'm going to be working part-time probably starting in September...seasonal photographer at my old job. I'm also applying to start back to massage school then. That would be online except 2 days/month of hands on. Is there a point in introducing a bottle? Or should I wait and just do a silly when the time comes since she'll be 6 months?

[smeisnotapirate]

I'd do the sippy!