Make my boy sleep later in the morning--PLEASE!

[kevinsgirl]

I've read a ton of sleep books and nothing seems to help him sleep past 5:00/5:30. He goes to bed a little before 7 (and when he had a later bedtime he got up even earlier) and naps well (2ish hours). He's 21 months & doesn't nurse.

And lately, he's been waking up having a screaming fit at 3 or 4 in the morning. Which may or may not be a related issue.

Maybe you have some suggestions?

[lifeguard]

Ds wakes up most mornings around 5:30. I go & get him & bring him to my bed, he nurses & goes back to sleep, but if I were to get up with him at that time he would happily get up for the day. I honestly do not see anything before 7 as an acceptable time to start the day & just refuse to get out of bed with him. The odd day he feels he doesn't want to go back to sleep he is allowed to play on the bed beside me until it's a more acceptable hour (& even then he will usually eventually fall back asleep).

On the other hand ds goes to bed much later than yours does.

[corrieoseal]

I had this problem with DD around 21 months a few weeks after Daylight Saving started. I had to reluctantly push her bedtime back to about 8 so that I could start sleeping past 6 again. At first I thought that a later bedtime wasn't the answer, but I pushed it by about 10 minutes each night from 7:15-8 and it has helped. Now she sleeps in until about 6:15-7:30. My DD is still nursing, so I also taker her into bed with me if I'm just not ready to get started on our day. Another thing I do sometimes is go into her room, hold her and nurse her for a few minutes and then put her back in her crib with a couple of toys which can buy me another 20-30 minutes of sleep. Does he have a crib entertainer or a book or toy that you could put in with him that he might be willing to play with for 20-30 minutes?

Unfortunately, I can't get DD to go more than 10 hours at night so I have to compromise on bedtime or wake up. I know some kids sleep for 12, but I'm just not that lucky.

[Llyra]

My DS is like that. He always has been, since he was a baby. Everybody would tell me to just put him to bed later, and then he'd sleep later, but it doesn't work. He once stayed up until 1 am, on New Year's, and STILL was up by 5:45, and was hell on wheels for three days afterwards. If I try to ignore him and go back to sleep, he climbs on my head and pulls on my ears and screams in my ear and generally drives me bonkers until I wake up with him. I think some kids are really just "programmed" to be early risers, unfortunately. That said, there are ways to cope, and to edge them into sleeping a bit later.

Have you tried a blackout curtain? My kids have, behind the shades in their room, a thick heavy black curtain that blocks out every speck of light. That's helped us a lot. It also helps to keep them in the dark until roughly the hour when you'd LIKE them to get up, even if it means sitting in a darkened room for a few hours after waking. Also, if you can get away with it, you might try not feeding him until a more ideal waking time. The idea is that our bodies become naturally cued to wake up at a certain time if we're generally exposed to daylight and fed at that time.

If he's willing to entertain himself once he wakes, you could try confining him in a safe place, and letting him play with toys or even (heresy, I know!) watch TV until you wake. I didn't notice how old you said he was-- is he young enough for something like a pack-and-play or crib-- you could set him in there and go back to bed.

Doing these things, I did manage to convince DS to sleep until 6. Then I had to meet him halfway by moving my own accustomed bedtime to earlier, so that I could be functional for him once he did wake.

The good news is though that when he turned 3, and could start to understand a little better, I was able to teach him to stay in his bed until I came to get him, and now I leave him with a pile of books and a few toys and a cup of water next to his bed, and he most days can manage to entertain himself until even as late as 7. So I think it does get better as they get older, because even if they're awake early, they don't need you as much.

[elmh23]

He could just be a morning person. My MIL and DH are up at 6am no matter what time they go to sleep. My kids seem to have inherited this (though, they push it back to between 6:30 and 7.) I am not a morning person so this sucks for me.

That said, I stopped getting up with them when they were 2ish. I left the door to my room open (it opens right on to the living room/play space of our home) and they'd just play. Until recently, they'd get themselves a snack from the pantry but ds1 went through a stage of dumping the pantry contents on the floor and also climbing the shelves, so now there is a lock on the pantry and they're stuck with whatever is on the counter or in the lower half of the fridge (usually bread and fruit )

[Julbug]

My daughter (28 mo. old) is exactly the same way. She has an internal alarm clock that goes off around 5 a.m. (used to be closer to 4:30), even when it's still dark out, even if she's been up until midnight. Bringing her into our bed in the morning just made her giddy and alert.

After fighting and losing this battle for months, my husband and I just started putting ourselves to bed at 9 p.m. and waking up with her at 5. It was a pretty good solution.

Over the winter I got so sick of this that I caved and ordered a gadget that my SIL swears by. It's a night light that has a timer and switches from a moon to a sun at a time you set (www.goodnitelite.com). It took DD a few weeks to get used to it, but we have the thing set for 6 a.m. now and we pretty much all stay in bed until 6. DD still wakes up and calls for me between 5:15 and 5:30 most mornings but the difference is now I can point to the moon and she (usually) will quietly lie back down and stay alone in her room until the sun comes on. I don't think she actually falls back to sleep, but hey, I'll take what I can get.

[kevinsgirl]

Maybe posting a plea for help did the trick.

Last night he slept until 5:45 with no screaming in the night.

He sleeps in a crib in our room, which could be part of the problem--he knows we're right there. We do have black out curtains--our room is pitch black (because I like it that way).

We have our daughters in the adjoining room, and am afraid if we move him in with them (ages 3 & 5) they'll all start waking up early. The 3yo will sleep until 6:30 & the 5 even later...

Do any of your kids all share a room?

Thanks for all the help & ideas! Keep them rolling in

[DaisyMay]

Have you tried putting him to bed earlier in the evening? Sounds illogical, but we've definitely found that when ours are overtired/more tired they will wake earlier, and sometimes an earlier bedtime actually results in a later wake-up. I also found having the baby in a different room made her more likely to sleep longer/go back to sleep, and even now when we're on holiday and she's in with us she'll wake much earlier and not settle back down where she would were we at home. It may be worth trying him in with his sisters for a few nights - they may wake earlier but they may go back to sleep if he wakes them or he may take their lead - could be worth a try.

[LCBMAX]

We just got this clock, and I think it's helping at our house where we use it to signal then end of the no-milk-night and the beginning of mama-milk-morning.

[Llyra]

Do any of your kids all share a room?

All three of mine sleep in the same room-- they're 5, 3, and 3. They've been sharing since the twins were about a year old. What I've found is that they really don't wake each other up. Seriously, I've seen DS sitting IN DD2's bed, and she sleeps merrily through the whole thing. And this morning, the twins were having a riot and running around pulling stuff off shelves, and DD1 never even budged. I think it's because they're so used to each other's noises. They woke each other up a lot at first, though. It took time to get it to this point. And bedtime in the evening is sometimes VERY interesting.

[Centura]

OMG... I am so happy to see that I am not the only one battling this!! I have been feeling like THE WORST MOTHER IN THE WORLD for wanting to sleep an hour or two after the "rooster" wakes up.
I have been forcing myself to get up with them, but now and then I have let them play and entertain themselves for a while before I got up, but I always felt like it was completely irresponsible to be in bed when they are not.
Now I realize that maybe actually, it is not such a horrible thing!!! Oh what a relief!
Baby boy is 19 months and sleeps in a crib beside me, he cant get out of it by himself yet, so he stays there until I take him out, the girls are 4 and 5.

[elmh23]

Originally Posted by kevinsgirl

Do any of your kids all share a room?

They did up until December. We separated them partly because ds has a REALLY hard time going to sleep and is noisy. He was keeping her up or winding her up so she then had a hard time going to sleep. We separated them right before winter break and OMG, she slept SOOOO much better during break without her brother there to distract her. They have never woken each other up though.

[kevinsgirl]

Thanks again--Baby Boy at least hasn't been waking in the night. It's funny, if we get him to bed right at 6:30, he'll sleep until 6 or 6:30, but if we're even 20 minutes late on his bedtime, he's up at 5.

I've staggered my girls' bedtimes now too, so 3 yo is in bed at 7, asleep by 7:15 or earlier. 5 yo is in bed at 7:30 and falls asleep rather rapidly as well. It's heaven.

I'm seriously considering moving the 22 mo in there with them...because we'll have the baby in our bed in September...

and Centura--know you are not a bad mom!! My husband is usually up with them in the mornings, but I do lie in bed while they are up when he has to leave early. And at quiet time the girls don't nap, but if I need one, I assign them to their quiet time rooms not to come out on pain of death (jk) so I can sleep.

It is amazing how much better I feel with enough sleep!