4 yr. old won't stay in bed and #2 on the way

[steph66]

DD has her bed set up in our room and she is great about going to bed in it and usually stays asleep most of the night. But majority of times she gets up in the early morning hours and gets into our bed. We have a full size bed that is literally not even two feet from her toddler bed and it is getting just wayyy too crowded in our bed. DP hardly gets any sleep when she's in bed with us because she has to be right up under you and on top of you at the same time and he is a light sleeper. She also has this security habit of touching and holding earlobes which also keeps DP awake. She has even been waking me up a lot and I'm a heavy sleeper. We plan to co sleep when the new baby comes and its just not going to work with her in the bed. We've talked and talked about her staying all night in her big girl bed and she seems to understand when we talk but the next morning she is in the bed with us again. If DP gets up and puts her back in her bed she starts crying and getting upset and will usually cry/pout her way back to sleep if at all. I feel bad for her b/c she has always slept with us and i know that is what she is used to, but she's had her 'big girl bed' for almost a yr now. Lately she has taken to waiting for DP to fall back asleep again and then "sneaks" into our bed as quietly as she can. I'm not sure what to do but I want to make this positive for her and have her stay in her bed all night before the baby comes. I'm just at a loss as to how to go about this. DP is all but losing his patience (and sleep) so I really want to help her the best way possible. Has anyone BTDT? Any tips?

[Hayeser]

You could get one of those toddler clocks that tells her when it's ok to get out of bed (link: http://www.onestepahead.com/catalog/...mSource=Search ) we never had to go that far with our 3yo, but I've heard that the clock works well for some parents. I laid out the rules ("we don't get out of bed until someone comes to get you") and she follows it. Plus, she knows if she breaks the rules that the teddy bear (or something she likes to keep in her bed at night) will have to go in time out. I think she's gotten out of bed twice in almost a yr.

good luck!!

[ms.shell]

can she have her own room?
my older son coslept exclusively until he was about 4. My baby however, has been moved to his own room much earlier, as this has worked better for us with this son. He was in our room for most of his first year, but now he sleeps in his big boy bed (crib mattress on the floor) in his room. There is a gate at his door. So he can play safely and freely in his room but is contained in there if we are sleeping or unavailable. I fought battles about staying in bed with my older son; i even had my nose broken by his head at 2 am when i was trying to keep him in bed and he had other ideas. We decided with our 2nd not to extend the family bed and it has worked out quite well for us. Little babies, yes, i will have to have right next to me, but no way could i see having baby and also a young child in my bed. Not knocking it for those who do it and love it! But i have found that my younger ds has been as happy as we are with having his own space. i do have to get out of bed at night which i dont love so much and was a big reason i coslept, but we are all happier this way. But we do only have a queen sized bed which is a main reason we couldnt work it. I really would think that 4yo would not be too early to consider giving her her own space if that is any possibility. I had a twin bed in my older son's room when he was 4 and i would lay down with him until he passed out and sometimes sleep there with him thru the night, especially during the transition from sleeping in my bed.
I hope ya'll find whatever solution works best for ya'll. Good luck!