Supporting a woman pregnant with twins.

[TheGirls]

So my DP is pregnant right now. We had an ultrasound today and learned that she is carrying twins! I'm simultaneously thrilled and terrified, lol. We also have an almost-2yo who I gave birth to. This is DP's first pregnancy. So I'm working on the shock and the panic first, but what can I do to help support her? I'd love resources on twin pregnancy, birth, and breastfeeding, particularly, since those are the first issues. I did tons of research for my pregnancy & birth with DD but it's all so different. Specific stuff:

Pregnancy & diet. DP feels ok so far, tired and hungry, but nothing awful. She has not gained any weight, and still fits in her "skinny pants". I did the Brewer diet when I was pregnant and it helped me get through the morning sickness. Is it well though of for twin pregnancies? I'd like to keep her as healthy & happy as possible, of course! DP has made it clear that she would be happy to eat it as long as I cook it.

Birth. DP's one wish for pregnancy was to not have a c-sectiion. She had planned for a natural birth. What are her odds of still avoiding c-section? What, if anything, can we do to improve those odds? Currently her OB has said he would consider a vaginal delivery as long as the twins are positioned ok. He has also said he would not induce her before 39wks, and that would be negotiable. We do have other options for providers (including a couple of midwives) so I'm wondering what we should be looking for in terms of policies...

[Gena 22]

Congrats and welcome! Check out my too lengthy response to the Dr. Luke question - in sum, keep up the good work feeding your partner well! Some women do swear by the Brewer diet for twin pregnancy. I was more casual - eat good, whole foods, plenty of fluids and protein.

Natural birth is totally possibly with twins, assuming all goes well. But it will depend on provider. What her OB says sounds good, but don't take her/his word for it. Ask around, what the hospital's twin c/s rate is, what the practice's is. My docs said they'd consider vaginal birth too, but then I found out the hospital has an 80% twin c/s rate. And as a first time birther, that's going to be an even harder battle. "Unproven pelvis."

I went with a midwife and had a HB, which I loved. Might be hard to find in NY though. I think you'd need to go under the radar. But if you're set on a natural birth, it's the way to go!

Best wishes!

[Intertwined]

to Gena (again-hey girl I'll just follow you around MDC all night saying , OK!? )

Lots of good info in the Dr. Luke thread!

Congrats to you both and how sweet of you to already be looking for ways to support her! That rocks!

[verycozy]

La Leche League has a book called Mothering Multiples, which is a good resource for breastfeeding twins.

The website naturallyparentingtwins.com is also a great resource. There's a yahoo group called AP multiples or something like that.

On facebook there's a page/group/whatever called Babywearing Twins (as a bonus, the twins have two mamas).

Totally not my business, but have you considered inducing lactation in yourself, like how adoptive mothers sometimes do? The only reason I ask (other than because I think that would be kind of awesome) is because breastfeeding twins can be exhausting and maybe two breastfeeding mamas to two breastfeeding babies is more manageable ratio...

[MamaChicken]

Oh my STARS! To have another nursing mama for the twins? If you do that, I would be eternally jealous.

[TheGirls]

Originally Posted by verycozy

Totally not my business, but have you considered inducing lactation in yourself, like how adoptive mothers sometimes do? The only reason I ask (other than because I think that would be kind of awesome) is because breastfeeding twins can be exhausting and maybe two breastfeeding mamas to two breastfeeding babies is more manageable ratio...

I shouldn't need to induce lactation, since I have a nursing toddler currently who I highly doubt will wean. I had planned on nursing a little bit even if it was a singleton, but now I definitely plan to take some steps to get my supply back up (fenugreek & pumping at a minimum) and am considering whether I'd be willing to take domperidone to bring back something resembling a full supply.

Though that will get us to two breastfeeding mamas, two breastfeeding babies, and one breastfeeding 2.5yo, but still, you do what you can.

Plus DP will need to go back to work at some point (she's our sole financial support) so me having some supply will help keep her from having to fully pump for two during the day.

Any tips on how to do this without compromising DP's supply? Mine is pretty bulletproof after 2 years but she'll be establishing a new supply, possibly after a less-than-ideal birth...

She's completely not interested in a homebirth, btw, so we're going to have to work with the hospitals.

Thanks so much for all the info!! Keep it coming, and I'll keep poking around here.

[lilysmama1124]

Originally Posted by MamaChicken

Oh my STARS! To have another nursing mama for the twins? If you do that, I would be eternally jealous.

I almost started crying at the thought of having someone else to murse the girls...that would be awesome!! There is lots of good practicle info already mentioned. I just want to add that cooking, cleaning, snuggling and massage are the best gifts to pg with twins mama Also there is a fine line to walk as far as supporting her in having a healthy pg and being critical. I know my mom was ALL OVER ME about my eating and rest and although I knew why it made me feel like I was under the microscope, not being trusted, and that if something didn't go perfectly it would be all my fault!!

[lilysmama1124]

Originally Posted by TheGirls

I shouldn't need to induce lactation, since I have a nursing toddler currently who I highly doubt will wean. I had planned on nursing a little bit even if it was a singleton, but now I definitely plan to take some steps to get my supply back up (fenugreek & pumping at a minimum) and am considering whether I'd be willing to take domperidone to bring back something resembling a full supply.

Though that will get us to two breastfeeding mamas, two breastfeeding babies, and one breastfeeding 2.5yo, but still, you do what you can.

Plus DP will need to go back to work at some point (she's our sole financial support) so me having some supply will help keep her from having to fully pump for two during the day.

Any tips on how to do this without compromising DP's supply? Mine is pretty bulletproof after 2 years but she'll be establishing a new supply, possibly after a less-than-ideal birth...

She's completely not interested in a homebirth, btw, so we're going to have to work with the hospitals.

Thanks so much for all the info!! Keep it coming, and I'll keep poking around here.

As tempting as it would be to have you nurse the tiwns right off the bat I would suggest waiting to do much nursing of the babies for several weeks until her supply is established, pumping and saving for when she goes back to work would help....that is a good question

[TheGirls]

Thanks everyone! It's great to hear some opinions from folks who aren't assuming we'll just do formula this time...

The food thing is actually going great. She feels a lot better on Brewer and she likes having the structure. I'm not nagging or pushing or anything, don't worry. I do all the cooking so it's just nice for me to have a guide to how MUCH food to pack for her during the day. I realized I had not adjusted sufficiently before and was sending her with normal lunches.

I'm also thinking of trying to wait a least a couple of weeks to nurse. I'll probably also be busy those first couple of weeks with taking care of everything house & toddler wise so she can recover & nurse. We'll have more help later because we have family who will be coming out to help (actually helpful family, my mom and sil, not interfering family) but they probably won't be able to come until a bit after the due date (hopefully not too long after the babies are born).... Anyhow, that might be a good time for me to spend some quality time with my pump once grandma and auntie can amuse the toddler and help with the house.

Stocking the freezer would probably be an excellent idea... I'm thinking that should be my next mission.